Children with "low emotional intelligence" can actually see at a glance from an early age that many parents do not care

After dinner, I received a message from Hao Hao's mother asking me to recommend some picture books that could improve her emotional intelligence. I was a little surprised by this and asked curiously what had happened.

Later, Hao hao's mother told me that when she went to school to pick up the baby today, she was stopped by the teacher alone, and the teacher told her that Hao Hao's performance in school today was not very good, and led other children to laugh at the appearance of the transfer students and call people "little fat". Although Hao Hao apologized under the guidance of the teacher afterwards, the teacher still hoped that parents could pay more attention to the cultivation of children's polite etiquette and emotional intelligence.

Haohao's mother's experience does reflect the educational "loopholes" of some parents in today's society, and many parents are usually more concerned about their children's intelligence and IQ level, and often ignore the cultivation of emotional intelligence.

According to modern research, the factors that determine the success of talents are not only IQ, but also emotional intelligence. Parents who have not yet paid attention to the cultivation of their children's emotional intelligence should pay attention to and want to know how their baby's emotional intelligence is, which can be seen from their daily life.

What do children with low emotional intelligence show? In fact, from an early age, you can see at a glance that parents should not think about it

1) Likes to complain

People who like to complain usually have more "negative energy" and like to pass the responsibility on others. If your child likes to make excuses for himself after making mistakes, then parents should be snacked, do not let the child continue to carry out such behavior. Learn to dare to take responsibility for yourself, blindly shirk and complain, will only make children lose a lot of friends.

2) Be self-centered

No one likes to be friends with selfish people, and a self-centered person who doesn't think about others is rarely liked. Usually only children will be more likely to be self-centered, because parents and elders will spoil the "only seedling" in the family. When children get used to this feeling of "the stars holding the moon", they will develop a self-centered habit of thinking only about themselves and ignoring the feelings of others.

3) Do not know how to respect others

American psychologist Maslow has a hierarchy of human needs theory, in his theory a person has a total of 5 layers of needs, the lowest and most basic is the physiological needs, including eating and drinking, and the need for respect ranks second, which shows the importance of respect for a person.

If children are not able to recognize the importance of respect from an early age and respect others, they are prone to problems in interpersonal communication. Everyone desires to be respected, and the premise of being respected is that we must first learn to respect others.

When implemented in specific situations, it is generally to respect the personality, point of view, appearance, etc. of others. The Haohao mentioned above did not respect the appearance of others, so he would be said by the kindergarten teacher that emotional intelligence lacked training.

How can parents improve their children's emotional intelligence? Teach you 3 tips to learn for new parents

1) Recognize emotions

The first thing we need to do is to lead the child to recognize their emotions, both positive and negative. Most children are aware of positive emotions and know when to be happy and when to get excited, but they pay little attention to negative emotions. At this point, we should also help them recognize their negative emotions.

For example, when a child loses his temper because his parents didn't buy him a toy, what we have to do is calmly communicate with them and tell them that they are now throwing a tantrum because their parents are not meeting their temporary needs, which is not right. Then communicate with them why they weren't given toys.

Maybe at the beginning the child can't listen to it at all, still noisy, it doesn't matter, high emotional intelligence is not achieved overnight, it needs long-term parents to cultivate.

2) Use emotional picture book guidance

For new parents, taking a baby is a very profound lesson. If you can use the tools around you, then the baby will be much more worry-free. In terms of improving emotional intelligence, we can also learn from emotional picture books for guidance.

3) Parents lead by example

If parents can lead by example, it will be the best template for children to learn. Take a closer look, do some of the child's bad habits learn from their parents?

If the parents are emotionally stable and have a good way of doing things for others, I believe that children can also learn the essence of it. Conversely, if the parents are emotionally unstable and often do nasty things, it is easy for the child to not make friends in life.

The famous writer Ke Yunlu said: Emotional intelligence determines a person's love, marriage, study, work, interpersonal relationships and the entire career to a greater extent than IQ. So moms and dads should not forget emotional intelligence while paying attention to IQ!

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