Children are like small saplings, in the process of his growth, need parents to take care of, do not let the roaring storm, first let the child bend the waist.
Source | Mom Handbook
01
Recently watched an issue of "Super Nursery", in which a mother and son made me feel very touched.
The 3-year-old son Hao Hao is sometimes unreasonable and likes to cry, while the mother, who has a very violent personality, likes to use yelling to solve problems.
Under such a personality relationship, their daily relationship is similar to this:
The son followed his mother to the vegetable market and kept crying and begging his mother, "I want to hug, I want to hug."
But my mother refused, "No, hold back, if you say no, you can't do it."
No matter how Haohao cried, her mother resolutely refused, and when she was angry, she would leave her child behind, no matter how dangerous the road was.
After coming to the market with his mother, Haohao's attention shifted to novel items and asked a lot of questions:
"Buy this line, what is this, this..."
We all know that for a 3-year-old child, Ben is in a period of cognitive explosion, naturally full of curiosity about new things.
However, the mother, on the other hand, has no patience and will only reject the child one by one: "Well, don't ask any more questions, I won't say it!" ”
Finally back at home, Hao Hao played with the car, thinking that the family atmosphere would be more relaxed, but his mother was dissatisfied with the sound of the car:
"You're arguing now, and my head hurts.... If I hear the voice again, I will tell you that I am not polite to you. ”
In the back, he even got started to block Haohao from playing with the car, and the scene was once very chaotic...
In fact, the mother, who had always hated her son's annoyance, did not realize that every time she clashed, her roar overshadowed the child.
And the biggest noise in the house is also made by herself.
But she only thinks that all this is due to the child's unreasonable teasing, so she will constantly stop and yell.
In order to let the mother perceive the daily roar of the child, the program specially prepared a sound experience venue for her to listen to her usual voice.
When her former "yelling" echoed in her ears, the mother went from the initial shock, to nervousness, to the pain of squatting on the ground with her head held, which showed the extent of her collapse.
Imagine that the mother herself can't face these yelling sounds, let alone her son who is only 3 years old?
"Do not do to others what you do not want to do", these roars have caused great harm to children and the whole family.
02
The book "No Yelling, No Screaming" says that the child is a 24h monitor in front of you.
This machine records many scenes similar to the relationship between Haohao's mother and son——
"From the morning has been grinding until now, you see what time it is now, late for school is not late";
"Why is it so difficult for you to take a bath, then you don't wash it in the future";
"They all said don't get the rice out of the meal, how can you not remember, are you a pig";
"Don't be bothered, where are you asking so many questions, they are all annoyed by your questions."
Undoubtedly, these roaring words hurt children's self-confidence and curiosity to varying degrees.
And many times, what parents say about yelling is to make children obedient, but it is not true.
03
04
Yelling isn't the only way to solve the problem, it's the worst kind of behavior.
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