Hello everyone, I am a lucky pregnant sister ~
It is said that love is to find each other's advantages, marriage is to find each other's shortcomings, this point is placed on women, in fact, more applicable.
Data show that today's rising divorce rate has a lot to do with women's change of mind, because about 70% of divorces are initiated by women first.
Even if women are sweet when they are in love, and then they love their brains, no matter how they feel that they must be each other, they can slowly disappoint their husbands when they are married and encounter all kinds of trivial things in life.
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Then I couldn't help but ask myself, "How much water did I get in my head?" Just looking at such a person? ”
"If I could do it all over again, I would never marry my current husband"
When lovers are in love with each other, they always can't help but ask each other such a question: "If there is a next life, will you still be willing to be with me?" For couples in the period of hot love, this answer is undoubtedly yes.
But as long as women enter marriage and have children, you ask again, they will basically answer firmly: "If I can do it all over again, I will never marry my current husband." ”
@Methotrexate
"I really regret that at the best age, I married him despite my parents' objections, then gave birth to a second child in three years, became a full-time mother for five years, and then came out to work at the age of 29, didn't understand anything, started from the grassroots level, and took care of the children after returning home."
"And the husband is like using this home as a place of rest, only come back when he sleeps, usually do not know where, if it is not for the children, he will have left a long time ago."
@mayly
"Don't say it's him in the next life, I don't want to marry anyone, study well, work hard, honor my parents, and live a life of grace."
@Anonymous
"What is a husband?" After getting married, there was only one more giant baby, let the bowl be brushed, really only washed his own rice bowl, the garbage was thrown outside the garbage can, did not know to pick it up, every day is not to play games, or to pretend to be a grandfather. ”
Instead of women being disappointed in their husbands after marriage, many men do not regret marrying their current wives after marriage:
Some people thank the other half for taking good care of themselves; some people say that the wife has worked hard, she has not been allowed to live a good life in this life, and she must be able to leave work; and some people feel that the other party has given birth to a child and let her have a complete home.
Why are women more likely to be disappointed in marriage?
1) Influenced by traditional marriage ideas
The traditional idea of marriage believes that after a woman marries, she marries into the man's family, and needs to have children for the other party, take care of the housework, and honor the in-laws.
But this is very unfair to many women, the premise of the male and female protagonists is that the male side can support the family, but now it is not uncommon for the woman to take care of the child's family while going out to work and earn money.
Such a high-intensity effort, but also can not get understanding, care, naturally chill.
After the man marries his wife, he will be cared for and cared for in his future life, and the task of having children has also been completed, and he has made a lot of profits in marriage, and naturally he will not regret it.
As this saying goes: "When most men feel that their married life is very happy, what the wife thinks is that I am just the nanny of this family, and I only have to pay, not to gain." ”
2) Trapped in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Some women have been married for ten years and feel that they are outsiders to their husbands' families, as if their husbands and in-laws are a family, and she is a tool for other people's families to have children, plus a nanny who does housework.
But there are people who provoke everything:
"Today's dish is salty, today's dish is light."
"How did the child catch a cold again, how did you bring the baby?"
"What do you do with these things?" Spend money indiscriminately. ”
In the face of your mother-in-law's criticism, you can't refute it, otherwise it is not filial piety. Whenever the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is tense, no matter who is at fault with the husband, he will definitely favor the mother and let the wife be wronged.
Is it necessary for a woman to be unhappy in a marriage and need to transfer her feelings to her children?
Feeling that your husband is unreliable, disappointing them, and then transferring feelings to their children is the first choice for many women who are disappointed in their marriage.
But this can easily lead to many new problems in life:
▼ The relationship between husband and wife is worse
Since you have chosen to enter marriage, you must be prepared to face possible problems, and marriage is managed, and living habits must be run into each other.
The wife hides the dissatisfaction with the marriage in her heart and devotes her time to the children, but the husband does not know what is happening, and only feels that the other party seems to ignore him.
The result is that there are more and more misunderstandings between the two sides, and the feelings are getting weaker and weaker.
▼ It is easy to have a mental breakdown
After putting the focus of life into children, it is easy to expect from them, and their parenting pressure will increase, once the child's growth is not as expected, it is easy to be disappointed and tired, and may also have conflicts with children.
But once you choose to free-range, shift the focus of life to yourself, do not rush to raise children, expectations will be reduced, the future children are not as good as others, and will not be anxious.