1. The hostess and I went on a business trip for a week and got pregnant when we came back. The boss suspected that it was me and fired me in a fit of rage. I went to work in an electronics factory, and the canteen meal in the factory

1. The hostess and I went on a business trip for a week and got pregnant when we came back. The boss suspected that it was me and fired me in a fit of rage. I went to work in an electronics factory, and the canteen food in the factory was difficult to eat. Colleagues didn't want to eat in the cafeteria anymore, so they agreed that everyone would bring a dish. After eating for a few days, I found that it was still someone else's dish that had a fresh feeling. But after a few days they wouldn't let me participate, forking the fact that I was a single dog and couldn't cook. Besides, how come the bagged squeezed vegetables bought in the supermarket are not dishes?

2. Last month, my brother-in-law changed to an Audi R8 and gave me The Magotan, which he had driven for three years. While driving, he found 300,000 yuan in the co-pilot's glove box. I think the brother-in-law must have forgotten to take it, and quickly called him, who knew that he told me: This money is also for me! The brother-in-law said: Brother, you gave me the money in front of my daughter-in-law, and I said that I sold you the old car for 300,000 yuan, so that she would not think that I gave you the old car for free. I was touched at that time, if it weren't for my brother-in-law playing games in my room now, I would really think that this dream was real!

3. Since the third year of junior high school, the pressure is getting bigger and bigger, and the parents are caring more and more. In order to make me a good high school, my parents really wanted me to do nothing but study. I was washing my hair on Saturday night when Dad heard a voice asking me, "What are you doing?" I said, "Wash your hair." Dad said with concern: "Go to sleep, put your head down and I will wash it for you!" ”

4. I have not touched the car for many years with my driver's license, and I have almost forgotten the operation. On that birthday, my husband gave me a red Honda Civic. The next day I drove a new car to find my girlfriend, to take her out for a walk, in the car girlfriend is very nervous, a face may crash at any time! Later, when I asked for a seat in the truck, I asked her to go down and help me direct. I didn't expect this two goods to shout when they got out of the car: Hurry up, the main car has reversed, run fast! To this day, I still can't forget the frightened eyes and dodgy figures of pedestrians on the side of the road. "

5. There is a beautiful woman in the company, I go up to ask for the name, ask the phone, and the beauty laughs! Then the colleague pretended to be a leader and asked: New here? Beauty: Hmm. Colleague: Take out the ID card and check the mobile phone number, I will check the information. Then the colleague knows the name and phone number!!

6. Watching a beautiful woman live, I couldn't help but brush her with a 50,000 yuan gift for a while. My wife went crazy after seeing the transfer records and began to argue with me. In the end, the wife became more and more noisy, and she wanted to punch. I was very agile and grabbed her arm. The wife was still angry: "Why did you grab my hand?" I said calmly, "Hold the hand of the son, and grow old with the son." ”

7. The sister-in-law was a flight attendant on the high-speed rail, and an old man in a suit and leather shoes came up this day and sat directly in the first class. The sister-in-law went to check the ticket and told him: Sir, your ticket is a hard seat, not a first-class seat. The man said in disbelief: I am a big money, some are money, I want to go to Shanghai. The sister-in-law couldn't explain anything to him, and called the conductor, who lay on the man's ear and said something, and then the man got up and left. The sister-in-law asked incomprehensibly what was said, and the conductor said: I told him that the first class could not get to Shanghai.

8. On Valentine's Day, I bought my wife a set of Chanel lipstick, and my wife washed all my clothes when she was happy. Wearing the clothes that my wife washed was different, the smell was fragrant, unfortunately it rained after work, I walked on the road and felt that my body was getting more and more sticky, I looked, there were a lot of bubbles on the top, and my daughter-in-law did not wash my clothes. "

9. My father-in-law and mother-in-law came to the house as a guest, and in order to please them, I went to RT-Mart to buy abalone. After the purchase, I lined up to pay the bill, and in front of me was a small couple. The girl was holding a bunch of things in her hand, and the boy said: You buy so many things, and when it comes to moving, you have to take them away little by little. The girl was stunned, put some household items back, and said: Then only keep the food, after eating, throw the bag away and it will be gone. The boy said: But after you finish eating, the long meat will be carried on your body for a lifetime. The girl immediately put the thing down and left empty-handed...

10. Fa Xiao is a rich second generation, driving an open-top version of the Magotan all day, 90 years have not been married now, I heard that this day he went on a blind date. When I saw him, I asked him, "How's it going, brother, have you taken a fancy to that woman?" Fa Xiao: "People didn't look at me, and they turned around and left before they could talk a few words!" Me: "And the woman who doesn't worship gold, when you were on a blind date, you didn't open your open-top Magotan?" Fa Xiao: "It's open, but it rained that day!" ”

11. On the hard seat of the train, the girl next to me brought a large bag of fruit to put on the luggage rack, I was looking down at my mobile phone, first a grapefruit hit me on the head, then an apple, a duck pear... Smashing me with all kinds of meat, my sister said to me while picking up fruit: "Brother! This grapefruit is so bad, actually took the lead in escaping, and then we will eat it and get angry for you! "#Funny Moment#Humor Funny Paragraph##搞笑幽默趣闻 #