1． The professor sat opposite the peasant on the train. When bored, the professor said: I have a problem, if you don't know, give me 5 yuan; If you come up with a question, if I don't know, give you 500 yuan, such as

1． The professor sat opposite the peasant on the train. When bored, the professor said: I have a problem, if you don't know, give me 5 yuan; If you come up with a question, if I don't know, I will give you 500 yuan, how? Farmers agree. PROFESSOR: How far is the Moon from Earth? The farmer did not say a word and handed the professor 5 yuan. The farmer asked: Three legs up the mountain, four legs down the mountain, what kind of animal? The professor thought hard and helplessly gave the farmer 500 yuan. The farmer took the money and prepared to sleep. The professor asked: what is the animal with three legs up the mountain and four legs down the mountain The farmer did not say a word, handed the professor 5 yuan, and then slept with a low education and high IQ, which was terrible

2． The old man bought 2,000 acres of land with flowers, wanted to plant strawberries in the field, and let tourists pick them once for 80 yuan. But there were no strawberries growing in the field, and the old man was very upset, so he turned the soil over. It took a whole week to turn it over. It turned out that there wasn't even a single strawberry in the field. Ask the old man: How many seeds have you sown, how can you not have strawberries? The old man was shocked to hear this: Do you still want to plant strawberries and put seeds? Aren't there strawberries where there is soil?

3. I was bored wandering the streets on the weekend when I suddenly caught a glimpse of a new Bentley 4S store. So I walked in to see the car, and what I didn't expect was that the salespeople inside laughed at me. I asked her, "How much is this car?" The salesman rolled his eyes and said, "9.99 million !!!!!!!! Me: "Can I wholesale?"? The salesman immediately changed his face and smiled: "How many do you want to buy??" Me: "I want to give the company's senior management department a one, a hundred units are in stock? Salesman: "Not so much in stock." Me: "But what but, the spot is not enough I still buy to do??" "Then I walked out without turning my head back, and to be honest, the air conditioner inside was really cool!!!!!!!!

4. After dinner with the boss in the evening, I sent him back to the hotel, just in the hallway of the hotel, met a boy, I just got out of the elevator, he just happened to take the ringing mobile phone, came out of the room, answered first in a very small voice and said: "Mom, wait for me." Then he stood still for ten seconds, suddenly kicked at the door, and then put his voice on normal and said, "Mother, who was in the study room just now, is it out now??? ”

5. The company went bankrupt, the employees ran away with the barrel, and my years of hard work were destroyed! When my mother saw me like this, she said to me, "Child, even if everyone abandons you, you yourself feel that you can't give up on yourself, you know?" I replied movingly, "Got it!" Then my mom turned to my dad and said, "He knows, let's go." ”

6. Last night when I went to sleep, my husband suddenly turned over, hugged me tightly and said: Wife, this life is too short", I heard this sentence, shed tears of emotion, my husband continued: Buy a longer quilt tomorrow, I can't cover my feet, it's so cold

7. A: How can I live a long life? B: Quit drinking. A: I don't drink. B: Quit color. A: I don't like women. B: Vegetarian. A: I don't eat meat! B: So why do you want to live a long life?

8. The driver's license has been in hand for more than a year, and after hearing the news of the demolition of my hometown yesterday, I immediately found a buddy who knew how to drive me to accompany me to buy a car. After looking good, I paid for it, and when it came time to pick up the car, the buddies suddenly couldn't come. But I learned the manual gear, bought the automatic gear, and for more than a year has not wiped the car, pure white one, how to drive home This is a problem. Fortunately, the sales are more serious and responsible, when delivering the car, he introduced the general situation of the car in detail, how to hang the gear, how to start, how to park, how to shift gears, how to drive the near light, high beam and so on. Finally he sat in the co-pilot and walked around with me. On the drive home, the more I thought about it, the more wrong it became. I spent more than half a year in driving school, paid thousands of oceans, took the exam four times, and did not dare to go on the road... As a result, I went to the sales consultant and got it done in half an hour!

9. Last week I went to Sanya on a business trip, and my wife, who had just got my driver's license, actually drove my Maiten back to her mother's house. I told my wife to pay attention to safety when driving. As a result, the next day I was still dreaming, and I was woken up by my wife's urgent telephone ringing. Half dreaming and half awake, I heard her whisper: I just want to ask you, how to put away the airbag, and what is the insurance company phone number you bought? I'm no big deal compared to the car!

10. My husband has been working overtime regularly recently, and in order to treat my husband, I decided to make braised pork for my husband at night. After the ingredients were prepared, I was ready to start cutting the meat, only to accidentally cut my fingers. At this time, the daughter who was watching TV came to the kitchen, looked at the blood stuck on the meat and the board, and the daughter said solemnly: Are you coloring the braised meat, or are you dripping blood to recognize your relatives?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #