Raising children is indeed not an easy task, and everyone needs to continue to learn and achieve common growth with their children. ——I heard that the psychological counseling message as the child grows up slowly, especially the child will start to use "no" to fight against the parents, parents find that the way of disciplining the child, it seems that the child's growth rate can not keep up, the conflict between parents and children is increasing, and the parent-child relationship is becoming more and more tense.
Even many parents find that whether they are spoiled or strictly disciplined, the children do not seem to have changed much, and there are a lot of problems.
This is also one of the questions that many parents ask, why are today's children no longer as good as they used to be?
Some parents believe that it is the cause of family relations, caused by the doting of grandparents; Some parents believe that the current electronic products are too rich, and the flood of video games is caused.
In fact, there are deeper social reasons for the "difficulty of discipline" of children.
◎First, major social changes and development. Today's adults no longer set examples of obedience and obedience in their children.
In the past, the era of "three principles and five constants" and fathers' final says has passed, and with the progress of society, it is difficult for us to see anyone who is willing to play a role of inferiority and obedience, and everyone has begun to pay attention to equality and mutual respect for everyone. Therefore, children also follow the examples around them and also want to be equal and respected.
Some parents worry that if they give their children equality and respect, won't they let their children get the same rights as adults and be lawless?
In fact, equality does not mean exactly the same, two fifty cent coins are equivalent to a one-dollar note, but not exactly the same.
Children have no way to generalize with adults in terms of experience and life experience, so adults need to guide and guide children, but children should also receive equal dignity and respect, and they should have the opportunity to grow up in kindness and firmness rather than responsibility humiliation and pain, right?
Another important change is that today's children rarely have the opportunity to develop their own sense of responsibility and self-motivation.
Today's children do not need to work hard for the family's livelihood as they did in the past, on the contrary, today's children are given too much in the name of love, but do not need to put in any effort and investment of their own, and even take it for granted.
Many parents believe that good parents should protect their children from any setbacks and disappointments, so they help their children resolve all the difficulties encountered, or overprotect their children, but this also deprives children of the confidence and belief that they have the ability to face life.
There are also parents who are busy with their livelihood and pay attention to their children's intellectual development, but neglect to cultivate their children's independent ability and social ability.
We deprive our children of the opportunity to contribute responsibly in a responsible way, to have a sense of belonging and worth, and yet in turn blame the children and blame them for their lack of responsibility, which seems unfair to them.
These two social factors affect more and more family education, resulting in today's children not being as obedient as before, and being able to humbly accept the teaching and advice of parents and teachers.
At this time, positive discipline began to attract the attention of parents. In general, positive discipline is a method of discipline that neither punishes nor indulges, so that children develop self-discipline, responsibility, cooperation and the ability to solve problems on their own, learn social skills and life skills that will benefit them for life, and achieve good academic results.
However, there are also parents who have doubts about this and have a playful attitude, after all, raising children is indeed not an easy task, and everyone needs to continue to learn and achieve common growth with their children.
◎In the next issue, we will continue to learn the essence of positive discipline in depth to better lead the growth of children.