For children's problems, parents generally think of taking their children for psychological counseling when they have school weariness, rebellion, emotional disorders (fear, anxiety, depression, etc.), behavioral problems (Internet addiction, drug addiction, etc.), interpersonal problems (early love, bad friendship with teenagers, etc.).
For those children who are disciplined in behavior, have good academic performance, and have a moral character that meets the educational standards and requirements, many people will ignore their psychological problems. In fact, "good children" and "good students" will also have psychological problems, just because their external performance is not so obvious, and parents are difficult to detect.
Guangzhou child psychological consultation for you to interpret: the child has been studying very well, recently headache is difficult to go to school, hospital examination is no problem, what is going on?
01
Junjun (pseudonym) is the only son in the family, his father owns several companies, his mother is young and beautiful, Junjun's child has always been the pride of his family, he has learned well from childhood, is good at piano and painting, and is now in the third grade of primary school and serves as a captain in school.
For this child, teachers and parents have great expectations for him, and his mother is even ready to let this child go abroad to study in junior high school.
Recently, however, there have been some anomalies. According to Junjun's mother, not long ago, the child often complained of headaches, buzzing and dizziness in the head, and feeling unable to move. I took the child to the best hospital in Guangzhou and asked a specialist for examination, and no problems were found.
But the child still felt headache and dizziness, and the parents were afraid of misdiagnosis, so they took the child to a brain hospital in Shanghai for examination. During the time that the child was in Shanghai, he did not feel a headache and had a lot of fun. The mother felt that the child seemed to be fine, so she took the child back to Guangzhou so as not to delay the piano exam.
Unexpectedly, the situation became worse after returning home, and the child often woke up in the morning saying that he had a headache and dizziness, could not practice the piano, and fainted badly as soon as he practiced the piano. Parents are anxious, on the one hand, they are afraid that there is really something wrong with their child's body, on the other hand, the child's piano exam this time is very important, after the test can enter this very good school, miss it and have to delay a year, affecting the child's development.
There is no way, parents can only take their children to various hospitals to seek treatment, but there is no effect.
Because his parents felt that he could not miss the exam, Junjun also cared about the exam and insisted on taking the exam. After passing the exam on the spot, the child will be fine immediately, and he will no longer feel headache and dizziness.
After the careful grandmother knew about this, she insisted that the child's mother take the child to see a child counselor, and the mother was not happy, thinking that where the child would have psychological problems.
But grandma feels that this child is under a lot of pressure inside, this headache and dizziness are related to the child's psychological state, and I have also heard that some children will have dizziness, nausea, loss of appetite when they are under psychological pressure. This time the exam passed, the child's inner pressure was released, and the physical symptoms were immediately better, so what about the next time?
Do you have to wait until the child can't bear it, collapses, and something goes wrong before going to see it....
Although the mother is reluctant in her heart, she feels that her child is really okay, and usually gives the child a lot of freedom, and the child should have no pressure, but the grandmother's words are not unreasonable.
So, my grandmother brought the mother and son to the Guangzhou Hearing Bar Psychological Counseling Center and made an appointment with Teacher Huang Youwei.
02
In the consultation room, teacher Huang Youwei learned from her mother:
Junjun has always been a "good child" and "good student" in the eyes of his parents and teachers, very good and sensible, obeying rules and disciplines in behavior, and his parents can listen carefully when they are reasonable; Excellent academic performance, hobby of reading, painting, and good piano playing; Polite and generous, often enthusiastically helping children, and very filial and considerate to his mother...
According to his mother's account, Junjun began to learn bilingual and music in early education classes when he was two years old, began to practice piano at the age of four, and was able to play a lot of music and perform in front of everyone by the age of six.
Now in addition to daily study, I have to practice piano for an hour when I return home, and sometimes the children themselves ask for two hours of practice. I have half a day on weekends to learn to draw, and other times I hang out with my parents...
In the eyes of her grandmother, Junjun is a very good child, very sensible and well-behaved, "and sometimes I even feel that this child is not like a child," Grandma said. Yes, Junjun feels the same to Mr. Huang, smart and considerate, gentle, very "gentleman" in every move, even occasionally lively and "perfect", completely lacking some of the characteristics that an 8-year-old boy will have, such as self, childishness, rebellion, willfulness and so on.
For this headache and dizziness incident, Junjun is also confused, not knowing what happened to him and why he felt this way.
After relaxing, the imagery dialogue method is used to let Junjun return to the scene of headache and dizziness, and guide him to feel the real feelings in his heart, he feels that the air outside his head is very heavy (strong air pressure) and his head is about to crack, which is very painful and uncomfortable.
Let him imagine that there is a magical little man in his head, the villain has a magical gun in his hand, this gun can eliminate all obstacles and difficulties, let him use this gun to shoot the air pressing on his head, he feels a lot more relaxed.
Leading him to see what this cloud of air was, he vaguely saw his mother. Step by step to guide him to see what his mother looks like and what he is doing, in the picture, his mother stands on the side and looks at him with concern, her eyes are full of expectation, "You must pass this piano exam", this kind of concerned eyes are like a pair of big hands pinching his head, his head is very tight and painful.
During the consultation, he guided Junjun to use a gun to slowly loosen this big hand, making him feel a little freer. In a state where he feels slightly relaxed and free, guide him to talk to this "mother" in his head, let him freely express his inner thoughts and repressed emotions...
03
Psychological counselor Huang Youwei pointed out that Junjun is a typical good child, his words and deeds are very in line with his parents' expectations on the outside, and his requirements and expectations for himself are also very high, hoping that he can be a very good child, make his parents happy, and even choose to suppress his needs and "please" his parents in many aspects. This headache is actually a somatic resistance to excessive learning expectations.
Unlike ordinary children who are overly stressed to directly show annoyance, fear, and refusal to go to school, in "good students" like Junjun, they themselves do not admit that they want to temporarily avoid the pressure of exams and study pressures - because that is contrary to the image of "good children".
Therefore, physical discomfort such as headache, nausea, loss of appetite, insomnia, nightmares and so on has become one of the cathartic methods chosen by the subconscious.
For this piano exam, Junjun hopes to never live up to his mother's expectations of himself, "my mother is very good to me", parents also attach great importance to this exam, this exam makes Junjun feel "success or failure in this move", and his heart is very anxious. But because he has always been a "genius" and "excellent child" in the eyes of his parents and teachers, he does not allow himself to show negative emotions such as anxiety (sometimes these emotions actually have a positive effect), so the subconscious can only express these emotions through physical discomfort.
In fact, Junjun's piano level is enough to cope with this exam, but the absolute concept of "can only succeed, can not fail", too harsh self-evaluation standards and repressed emotional regulation (not allowed to express bad emotions) have affected his physical and mental health.
Through Mr. Huang's good practice and many relaxation exercises, Junjun's inner self-evaluation standards have been adjusted, and he is more and more able to express and release his psychological pressure, and no longer express it in this somatic form.
Grandma and mother are very happy that Junjun can go to school again happily and easily, face exams, and solve the problem that it is difficult to go to school due to headaches, and feel that their children are happier and more confident than before.