Summary: Already very skilled in eating with a spoon,
But after a while, you have to use your hands to grab rice.
Parents are puzzled by their child's "regressive" behavior, are nervous, and don't know what's going on
In the growth of children, at a certain time, parents may find that children have learned one thing, but then they can't do it well.
For example, children who originally learned to go to the toilet by themselves suddenly will not be in the near future, all pulled in their pants;
I was already very skilled in eating with a spoon, but after a while, I had to use my hands to catch the rice.
Parents are puzzled by their children's "regressive" behavior, they are very nervous, and they don't know what's going on, how did this "regressive" behavior of their children come about?
Interpretation of parent-child education consultation.
First, I want to get attention
When parents are busy with work or other things, it is easy to snub their children.
Children demand adult attention not only for their physical and safety needs, but also for their indispensable psychological and emotional needs.
In general, children will use positive self-expression to attract the attention of adults, eager for adults to recognize and praise his behavior, so as to gain a sense of self-worth.
But once they find themselves unnoticed, they will have negative feelings such as inferiority or insignificance, and thus make some retrogressive behaviors.
The goal is to signal to adults: I don't want to be left out.
If parents find that they have indeed snubbed their children, they should give them proper attention and let them grow up healthily under the bath of love.
Second, the birth of a younger brother or sister makes the child afraid to grow up
Due to the birth of the second baby, parents will focus on the newborn baby and accidentally ignore or forget to take care of the eldest.
Many older children are lost, restless, jealous, and their minds are more sensitive and fragile, if their parents do not pay attention to them, or are impatient, they directly reprimand:
"You are a sister/brother, you should be sensible."
Such words that hide status changes often make children worry that their parents will not love him if they have younger siblings, and of course they will be very repulsive, thus "inducing" the child's behavior to regress.
At this time, parents should let their children understand that parents always love themselves, no matter what problems they encounter, as long as they turn around, they can return to their parents' arms.
This will make the child feel safe and make him feel that he is being cared for, so that he can regain his confidence and slowly adapt to his current life.
Third, it is normal for children to have some behaviors "degenerate"
In healthy children aged 3-6 years, "regression of behavioral capacity" is a very normal and common phenomenon.
For example, if a three-year-old child who could have defecated freely suddenly "incontinent" and often pulled into his pants, this made parents very dissatisfied, and loud and whispered persuasion did not help.
In fact, three-year-olds are experiencing desire period, and contraction and relaxation of the anus and urethral sphincter can bring sexual experience to the child.
Some children get sexual pleasure from holding urine, and some children get sexual pleasure from holding stool.
At this time, parents must not show impatience, it is best to calmly and gently change the child into clean pants, do not humiliate, laugh, scold the child.
Do not talk about it in front of your child, and you should not use your child's wet pants as a talking point for your family.
As long as the family does not make a fuss and is strictly harsh, the child can successfully pass the period in one or two months.
Similar degenerative behaviors include, for example, some 1-year-olds already using a spoon to deliver food to their mouths.
But when he turned 2 years old, the child suddenly had to grab it with his hand and put it in his mouth, and the rice was scattered all over the table, and the parents felt very anxious.
In fact, this is also the normal stage of the child's development, and this change reflects that the child's hand movements begin to transition to more refined finger movements, and he can already use his fingers to pinch rice grains.
For this change of children, parents do not need to be anxious, should recognize that this is a tendency for children to explore.
At the same time, parents can play some finger pinching games with their children to better develop their children's new abilities.
Fourth, the child is helpless and does not adapt
Some older children will reappear to bite their fingers.
In general, nail biting is a habitual behavior when children feel nervous, stressed, hungry, or bored, and sometimes it is a symptom of loss of mental or emotional control.
When this happens to a child, parents need to pay attention to whether the child is not adapted to changes in the environment.
For example, if the child has just started kindergarten, he is not gregarious enough in kindergarten.
The child is anxious about something; Changed to a new residence, children do not fit in, etc.
If it is caused by environmental changes, parents should guide them and find ways to help their children adapt to the new environment.
If the child feels stressed, then parents should also communicate with the child patiently and gently, find the cause of the child's anxiety, and help the child find a way to solve it.
When the events affecting the child's behavior are resolved, the child no longer feels helpless, and the external degenerative behavior disappears.