Language is a skill, but also an art.
As the saying goes, a good word is warm in three winters, and a bad word hurts people in June. People who are good at talking will give people the feeling of a spring breeze. People who are not good at talking, the tone and wording of the speech can easily cause unnecessary misunderstandings.
Learning to communicate with people is an ability. Mastering the art of speaking will also bring blessings to this life.
When you say the wrong thing and do the wrong thing when you are young, you have the opportunity to correct it, and it is easy to get the understanding of others. And if a person can't control his mouth after becoming an adult, it is easy to provoke right and wrong, provoke the unhappiness of others, and add blockage to the rest of his life.
People live a lifetime, no matter at what age they must learn to speak well, but also should understand, manage their mouths, some words would rather rot into the stomach, do not easily say to the children, so as not to cause unnecessary disputes.
01 Secrets of my own past
Everyone has some secrets that are not known to outsiders to a greater or lesser extent, and even intimate partners and children cannot easily say them, especially at a certain age.
After all, it is not easy to have a harmonious and stable family, which is a blessing that has taken most of your life's efforts. If you accidentally reveal your secret because you don't choose your words, it will make the family uneasy.
Qin Wan, Zhou Shengchen's stepmother in "One Life and One Life", originally the person she liked was Zhou Shengchen's uncle Zhou Shengxing, but because of family reasons, she was forced to marry Zhou Shengchen's father in order to give Zhou Shengchen a name.
The marriage was unfortunate, and Zhou Shengchen's father did not have Qin Wan in his heart, she and Zhou Shengxing often met, the two could not help themselves, and gave birth to a pair of twins, that is, Zhou Wenchuan and Zhou Wenxing.
Originally, Zhou Shengchen did not mention these things, and the family got along peacefully, but Zhou Wenchuan moved the thoughts that should not be had.
He is not related to Zhou Shengchen by blood, and his own biological father is now in charge of the family, so he wants to replace Zhou Shengchen and be the future helmsman of the Zhou family.
Qin Wan also wanted to seek the welfare of her own son, and repeatedly connived at Zhou Wenchuan, acquiescing to all the actions he had done in time for Zhou Shengchen, including shooting, hijacking, poisoning and other incidents.
But I didn't want it to be her cover-up that eventually led to Zhou Wenchuan's death.
If These secrets of Qin Wan had never been known to Zhou Wenchuan, perhaps he would not have had delusions in his heart, let alone ended up with the point where his children had all died because of this.
Therefore, when parents must remember that there are some secrets that cannot be spoken, it is best to let them become secrets forever.
02 Things that can't be done
Some parents like to make empty promises to their children. Maybe when they drew bread for their children, they didn't think so much, just casually talked about it, but the child took it seriously.
One day, when the child asks for it from his parents, the parents can't get anything, and the result is a contradiction.
The friend's cousin fell out with his parents because when the cousin first went to college, his parents promised that when he graduated, he would pay a down payment to buy him a suite in his city, and said that the family's property would be his own.
Unexpectedly, my cousin took this to heart. However, when my cousin went to college, her mother accidentally became pregnant, and they also thought that one child was too lonely, and the two children could be just a companion, so they insisted on giving birth to a second child.
With the second eldest, the family's expenses have suddenly increased, and the economic burden has also become heavier. When the eldest son opened his mouth to buy a house after graduation, his parents hesitated.
Because the cost of raising a child is very high, it is impossible for the family to take all the money to buy a house for the eldest son, after all, the family's life will continue.
Moreover, after having two children, many things must be considered more, otherwise it is difficult to hold a bowl of water flat. If you buy a house for your eldest son, what will the younger son do in the future?
But having said that, his friend's cousin could not understand it, and he blindly emphasized that what his parents had said should count, and that everything in the family was his, but he did not care about the actual situation in the family today.
Later, because his parents did not buy a house for his cousin, his relationship with his brother was not good, and he was supposed to be a family that loved each other, but they always got together when they were sword-rattling.
Now my brothers are in their teens, and my cousin is married, but my relationship with my parents can never go back to before. For this reason, parents did not shed tears in the back, feeling that it was too hasty at the beginning, and the child's thoughts were biased.
03 Prejudice against child marriage
It is said that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law under the heavens is the most difficult, in fact, the relationship between Weng and son-in-law is the same.
Just as the mother-in-law always feels that her son is the best, no woman can be worthy of her son, and some fathers-in-law think that their daughters are their own hearts, and there is always prejudice against their son-in-law.
Parents love their children and always feel that their children are the best in their own family, which is also a normal phenomenon. But if parents do not know how to restrain their words and deeds, and always demean their marriage in front of their children, this is not a good phenomenon.
After all, children have established a family, their lives are their own, living well and badly, they are all adults, and they have the ability to take responsibility for their own lives.
No one can guarantee that what they say is right, and even parents may not be able to fully understand their children.
Therefore, in order not to attract the disgust of the children, maintain a harmonious relationship with each other, and as few as possible to fall into their marriages.
Only in this way can everyone maintain harmony and respect each other, and win the love of their children. When they have needs in their later years, their children will not prevaricate and refuse to contribute.
This life of a person is only a few decades.
Learn to control your own language, and understand that even if you are your own children, you can't speak too casually.
People often say that from falling to the ground to learning to speak, we only take a year or two, but learning to keep your mouth shut and not speak takes a lifetime.
And parents who can talk and those who can't talk must have different images in their children's hearts.
In this life, your fate with your children is finally drifting apart. If you want to maintain a good relationship, you need to understand which words can be said, which words would rather rot in the stomach, and do not spit them out easily.
END.