Text | genial
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Many times, in the world of three people, no matter how you squeeze in, you can't squeeze in, because you are only an outsider after all, even if you nominally have the person on the tip of your heart.
Love, which runs in both directions, will give you special treatment, will be willing to give up excessive care for the other sex for you, and will always pay attention to your emotions and your needs.
However, there is a kind of self-deception, probably to deeply understand that in the world of three people, they are the outsiders, but again and again they comfort themselves not to think blindly, they are just good friends.
A hot heart will eventually be poured with cold water again and again, making you have to succumb to the reality that he doesn't love you.
After reading such a story: Xiaoxue is hard to be with the male god Liaofeng, who has a heart and mind, but before she has begun to fall into the sweetness and joy of love, she finds that there is still a girl between her and Liaofeng.
Xin Xin is Liaofeng's hair small, and the intimacy of the two of them makes Xiao Xue a little jealous.
Xiaoxue and Liaofeng dated, Xinxin would go with them, originally a date for two people, it became a party of three people.
Looking at liaofeng and Xinxin's familiarity without talking, sometimes she thought that the two of them were a couple.
At first, Xiaoxue told Liaofeng that she minded Xinxin's existence, and Liaofeng would spoil her and say, "Even my small vinegar eats Ah? Shin Shin and I are friends. ”
Later, as Liaofeng often snubbed Xiaoxue because of Xinxin, Xiaoxue was in a bad mood and got into trouble with Liaofeng, and gradually Liaofeng lost his previous thoughtfulness, but blamed Xiaoxue for his willfulness.
On Xiaoxue's birthday, Liaofeng was worried that the company's power outage Xinxin would be afraid, so he left Xiaoxue halfway down. Xiao Xue had a fever in the middle of the night, and when he hoped that Liaofeng would accompany him, he was busy comforting Xinxin, who had lost love. Xiao Xue didn't know Liaofeng's payment passwords, but Xinxin knew all the passwords of Liaofeng.
When the light snow is needed, Liaofeng is often absent. In the midst of disappointment again and again, Xiao Xue finally saw the truth clearly, Liaofeng did not love her, he loved the Hair Xiaoxin that he had in mind.
On the day xiaoxue mentioned that they broke up, Liaofeng still blamed Xiaoxue and fooled around, but Xiaoxue said every pile of the past, blocking Liaofeng dumb.
There must be pure friendships in this world, but if friends of the opposite sex have shared these things, the relationship is mostly impure.
First, share time, on call
True friends of the opposite sex must have boundaries and distances.
When men and women are only friends with each other, then they will tacitly reduce contact when they know that the other party already has an object, avoid causing trouble to each other, and avoid interfering in each other's emotional life.
Because whoever it is, they will mind that their object has too close friends of the opposite sex.
The so-called friendship above the lovers are not enough, mostly refers to ambiguous relationships, at least one of the two sides likes the other, but one party pretends not to know.
Between a pair of friends of the opposite sex, you can be on call for the sake of each other, you can ignore your own object because of each other, then the so-called opposite sex friend in his mouth is not really a pure friendship relationship.
If your object ignores you many times for the sake of his friends of the opposite sex, then it means that he doesn't like you that much at all. You are no more important to him than his good friend.
Many times, when a person will not care about the object of his most care and attention for the sake of another member of the opposite sex, it is fully explained who is the most important in his heart.
Perhaps, for some people, the loved one is too precious, too afraid of loss, or the loved one has a heart to belong to, dare not confess, afraid of no excuse to continue to accompany, so they use the so-called good friend to hide their sincerity, or even with a person they do not love at all, so as to take care of the people he really cares about.
Second, share money
Good friends are able to solve problems generously if you are in trouble, but it is difficult to share money because we are all individuals.
In most cases, sharing money is rare between family and love, and even sometimes it is the brothers who settle accounts.
Sharing money means I give you the right to spend my money anytime, anywhere.
Most of this right exists only between couples or couples who really intend to marry.
Therefore, when friends of the opposite sex can share money, it means that this so-called friendship is not pure at all, either the two sides like each other but dare not say it, or one party is willing to pay and the other side is at ease.
Xiao Ran has been a male girlfriend of Wei Wei for five years, he will always appear when Wei Wei needs it, Slightly lost love with him, Wei Wei was anxious to pay for tuition, he did not say a word to give his bank card and password to Wei Wei, his intention for Wei Wei is visible to people.
He had long been accustomed to Thinking of Wei Wei only when he needed him, and he also knew that he and Wei Wei could not be at all, but because he liked it too much, he felt that he was also satisfied to be Wei Wei's friend.
Others laugh and be silly, and every month's salary is taken out to raise "good friends", but Xiaoran feels very happy, and her salary can slightly reduce the financial burden.
Later, Xiao Ran finally failed to achieve his wish. After meeting a very favorite boyfriend, Wei Wei resolutely broke off contact with Xiao Ran.
"Xiaoran, thank you for being so good to me, but my boyfriend minds your presence, we don't want to contact you in the future, the money I owe you will be returned to you." 」
Whether there is pure friendship between men and women, the parties are more clear than the bystanders, but they are all pretending to be confused.
Third, share "secrets" and talk about everything
Secrets don't just refer to one thing, it has many meanings, it can be something or its own emotions.
If both men and women already have objects, but still share "secrets" and confide in each other about the pressure given to them by their respective partners, then it means that two people are often not a friendship relationship that warms up to the group, but an ambiguous relationship that is likely to be wanted by both parties to shift the focus of love.
Friends of the opposite sex can share secrets between each other, often to show that they have nothing to talk about with each other, can chat every day, and are willing to spend time and energy on each other.
Friends of the opposite sex can share secrets, share beauty, share emotions, and often the relationship is not simple, especially if one or both parties have already been in love.
There must be pure heterosexual friendship in the world, but when men and women have shared these three "things", the relationship is mostly impure, perhaps mutual liking is just using the name of friends to continue to be ambiguous, or perhaps want to call the name of friendship to seek the qualification to continue to love.
If you can, don't love an impossible person in the name of friendship; if you can, don't use the name of friendship to hurt someone who has you in your heart; if you can, don't use the name of friendship to disguise altruism and selfishness.
Regardless of whether men and women are really just friends, if heterosexual friendship crosses the line and hurts others, then this pure friendship is not necessarily desirable.
END
I am Hexu, a creator of the emotional field of warmth and happiness in my heart, writing emotional texts, I hope that my words can help you, thank you for reading.