1, the cousin was just newly married yesterday, and today he was admitted to the hospital. I went to see him with a gift, and my sister-in-law was standing in front of the hospital bed, with a shy face. While my sister-in-law was out, I asked, "You."

1, the cousin was just newly married yesterday, and today he was admitted to the hospital. I went to see him with a gift, and my sister-in-law was standing in front of the hospital bed, with a shy face. While my sister-in-law was out, I asked, "What are you doing?" Cave flower candle night fight? Cousin: "When I woke up this morning, your sister-in-law found that there was one more person in the bed, and she kicked me out without even thinking about it!" ”?

2. A boss plays with Xiao San, and Xiao San is forced to marry and asks for tens of millions of compensation. The boss thought hard and calculated. He spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to get her into a high-end business school on the pretext of improving her cultural level. The class was as powerful as a cloud, and within two months, Xiao San was looking for a new love and ignored the boss. In order to maintain a pure image, Xiao San gave the boss a sealing fee of 1 million.

3, my girlfriend broke up with me, today I cheekily want to get back together, send her a message: can you go back, give each other a chance. Accidentally sent to the landlady, she: know wrong? I found out that it was the female boss, who was about to tell her that she had sent the wrong one, and her message came again: the salary card returned to you, the monthly salary increased by 5000, and we will be fine later. Serendipity, I replied: Okay. Landlady: Sorry, I made a mistake. I was overjoyed, so I had to answer with a sigh of relief: I was also wrong. And she said, me? Are you sure you still want your pay card? Brothers, how do I get back, can the card still come back?

4, the cousin drove the Bentley in line at the gas station to refuel, a hot girl to talk to the cousin: "Excuse me, I don't have enough cash, can I help you exchange Alipay for 100 yuan with you?" The cousin didn't think much of sweeping his cousin's Alipay with his mobile phone: "I'm sorry, my Alipay has no money." The hot girl blushed shyly and said, and then looked up at her cousin intently: "Is it okay to add your WeChat transfer to you?" ”?

5. Working in a Ferrari factory, one day a new beautiful designer arrived. When she drew the design on the blackboard, it may be a mistake to draw the wrong one. The beautiful designer hurriedly said: I'm sorry, the painting was wrong, and my brother was a little nervous about going to work one day. A 1+1 colleague stood up and said loudly: It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter if you draw wrong, we are all watching you, where is the time to look at the blackboard!!

6. When the abbot gave a speech at Tsinghua University, a college student became angry when he listened. The student asked the abbot: The head of what you are talking about here is the Tao, I am skipping class every day now, in addition to sleeping on the Internet, can you have a way to make me have fighting spirit? The abbot took out a mirror from the bag he had brought, handed it to the student, and said: Young man, look in the mirror when you have no fighting spirit, just like you bird, what reason is there not to struggle? student:......

7, and ex-girlfriend because of cold feelings broke up, for a long time no contact, today she suddenly sent me a message. She said she had just witnessed a car accident, and the couple who had been hit were still clasping their hands tightly until they died. I said: What do you mean by this message? Want me to change my mind? Let me cherish our previous feelings? She said: You think too much, I just want to tell you, today I got a driver's license, after going out with your girlfriend to give me a little more careful!

8. Today, my wife bought a latest Apple mobile phone for me to use. I was very happy inside, but I couldn't show it on my face. I said: Spend money indiscriminately, my mobile phone can still be used, this is too wasteful! But I was afraid that my wife would return the mobile phone, so I pretended to say: No, you can use it? Who knew that the wife smiled slightly and said: I know that my husband hurts me, then I will use it!

9. On weekends, my brother and sister-in-law visited the mall in a women's clothing store, and my brother sat and waited for my sister-in-law to try on clothes. After 15 minutes, the sister-in-law tried on a total of 5 sets of clothes. When the sister-in-law came out of the dressing room again, the brother looked up and down at the sister-in-law and said, "Very good, very good, this dress fits very well, just buy this!" My sister-in-law said, "Honey, when we went out today, I was wearing this one." ”

10. Our company has been suspended for 2 months, and today it finally resumed work. Early this morning, the boss came in with a smile: cough, I tell you a good news, our company's coffee machine will be free of charge from tomorrow onwards! I scoffed: Oh? After a long time, the coffee beans are tide! The boss glanced at me and continued: If the response is good, it will be free for a long time! I laughed: it seems that there are still a lot of damp coffee beans. Then the boss said angrily: You a lot, you give me out!?

11, a flower idiot sister in my dormitory, recently looked at a freshman small milk dog, but I have not known which department it is. Until one day, after many days of observation, she staged a magnificent porcelain bumping on the way the little milk dog rode by. The little puppy kept apologizing. She glared at him angrily and said, "Is it useful to say sorry?" Unless you give me my phone number.

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #