1. When a prisoner is executed, the prison guard just said, "Execution! Just listening to the prisoner laughing all the time, the prison guard immediately asked the handmaiden to stop and asked, "You are going to die, why are you still laughing?"

1. When a prisoner is executed, the prison guard just said, "Execution! Just listening to the prisoner laughing all the time, the prison guard immediately stopped the handmaiden and asked, "You are going to die, why are you still laughing so happily?" The prisoner said: "The book says, laugh every day, and sure enough, you can live for a few more seconds." ”

2, upstairs a new widow, she dressed up every day brightly, there is a particularly good smell of perfume, let me intoxicated. I pursued her fiercely, but she always ignored me. Unconsciously, after three months, on this day I said to her: Honey, it has been three months, you have put on various tests for me, can we have further development now? She said to me calmly: Today I will put the last test on you, if you can stand it, we can be together, you are here to wait for me. After saying that, she went to the bathroom to wash her face, and the moment she walked out of the bathroom, I immediately bounced off the couch, turned around and grabbed the door and went out...?

3, and the wife are violent temper, when they first got married, there were often some small frictions. And every time I quarreled with my wife, my wife would give money to let the two brothers-in-law beat me! Later, I said to my wife: I hate you for taking money to hire someone to beat me, the next time you want to beat me and tell me, you give me the money, as long as the money is in place, I will do it myself! So I came up with a reason, that is, when I didn't have money, I had a fight with my wife.

4. After paying my salary today, I said to my daughter-in-law: "Daughter-in-law, if I don't spend more pocket money this month, I won't even have enough money to buy cigarettes." The daughter silently walked into the room, and when she came out, she was holding a piggy bank in her hand, which contained the pressed money saved during the New Year in recent years. I was moved to the point of snotting, and then I heard my daughter say, "Mom, the money is still entrusted to you for safekeeping, and the safety factor is high." ”?

5, the local tycoon drove a Bentley to catch a plane, the car broke down on the way, just a taxi drove over. The local tycoon went up with an arrow step, and there was a little boy carrying a school bag, and the local tycoon said: "Little boy, the uncle is going to be late for the high-speed train, will he send the uncle first?" The little boy said, "I'm going to be late for school." The local tycoon shouted to the driver: "I'm out of 50, send me first!" The little boy also shouted: "I am out of 200, send me first!" The local tycoon shouted again: "I'll give 1,000, send me first!" The little boy said calmly, "You win!" Dad, send him first! ”?

6. The pork that my aunt just bought was put on the table, and the two Erhas in the family stole it after seeing it. The aunt took the feather duster and asked them who had eaten it, and they all looked innocent. The aunt took the dog food and put it on the meal, and the small one's Erha Xing rushed over to eat, and the big one was indifferent. My aunt smoked a feather duster on the big erha's ass: You're full, right? You're stealing food, right? Why doesn't acting in the whole set?

7. After resigning, I went to work in a glass factory. There are three elderly young people in the factory, all of whom are in their 30s and have no girlfriends. Only one of them took a leave of absence, and the other two thought he was on a blind date. Today in the canteen to eat, one said to take leave in the afternoon, the other two eyes are straight, dead or alive must follow him, said not to waste the opportunity!

8. Today I saw several middle school students wearing school uniforms on the bus. It's not good to be happy with the giggles and the jokes. In an instant, I remembered when I was in school. On a whim, I sent greeting text messages to a few junior high school buddies. Waited for a long time. Some didn't reply, some texted me back to ask: Are you? What shocked me the most was that there was a direct reply to me: I was not convenient at hand lately. What do you mean by that? I didn't ask you to borrow money, did I?

9. The little nephew has just reached adulthood and is more curious about the affairs of men and women. That time, the little nephew asked his sister-in-law: Mother, can't close relatives get married? The sister-in-law nodded and said, "Yes, for example, your cousins can't marry you." The little nephew asked again: Can distant relatives get married? Sister-in-law: Except for the distant relatives of humans, apes, you can marry whoever you want to marry!

10. The brother-in-law has just been admitted to college and has found a girlfriend whose life is not simple. Just last week, his girlfriend became pregnant. The morning after he got the news, he was alone at home smoking a cigarette. I comforted him and said: Still fight, you are still in school, you can't affect your studies! The brother-in-law looked at me and said after a few minutes: I am not worried about this, I am thinking about giving

11, I told the nurse: pretending to be a girlfriend once thirty thousand, she agreed, and less than three months later she ran to me angrily and asked me, how long are you thirty thousand times, it will not be a lifetime. I asked her how long you thought it would be appropriate, and she smiled and said, "As long as you don't want the jewelry your parents gave me back, it will take as long as possible." It feels like it's a long-term plan!...

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #