01
There has always been a saying in the folklore: "People are old and annoying." ”
When people reach a certain age, they will naturally face such a dilemma - being rejected. In fact, this is a particularly helpless thing.
Because everyone will have old times, everyone will have times when they are rejected, this is a reality that human beings cannot change.
We all know that it is not good to dislike the elderly, and we also know that we will face the result of being rejected in our later years, so why can't we do a better job and tolerate elderly parents?
In the words of Du Mu: "Future generations mourn and do not learn from them, and they also make future generations mourn later generations." ”
Everyone will grieve for those unfortunate things, but we will all leave them behind after sighing and sighing. Therefore, unfortunate things will happen one after another.
A famous person once said that nothing new has been done in the ages.
From ancient times to the present, there is not much new. There are many things that will be repeated. Because history will continue to reincarnate, old problems will also arise. This is nothing new.
Take the matter of "people are annoying when they are old", in fact, it has always existed, and it has basically become an unsolvable problem.
After people reach their old age, perhaps the following types of elderly people will eventually be "abandoned" by their children.
02
The elderly who are sick in bed will face the dilemma of no filial piety in front of the bed for a long time.
There is a saying that "there is no filial piety in front of the bed for a long time, and there is no virtuous wife in the long poor family." ”
An old man is seriously ill and can only lie in bed and cannot move, believing that his children will become unfilial. It is not that children want filial piety, but that life forces them to be filial.
There was once such a family, the relationship between the old man and his children was very good. However, when the old man was sick in bed, the relationship between the old man and his children became tense.
Especially after the old man was sick in bed for three years, the children actually blamed each other, played tai chi with each other, played leather ball, and no one wanted to take care of the old man and let himself spend money and energy.
For such children, we can only evaluate them as unfilial. As everyone knows, this is true human nature. In the face of responsibility, no one wants to suffer. In this way, the last person to suffer losses can only be the old man lying on the hospital bed.
Therefore, when the old man is sick in bed, the true side of the children will be revealed.
03
Old people who have little money will be rejected by some children.
Money, after all, is a person's talisman. You have money, you don't have money, in fact, the attitude of your children to you is different.
When you are rich and powerful, believe that your children will respect you very much, and even all your relatives will surround you and treat you as a family member.
On the other hand, when you have no money and no power, don't say that your relatives will dislike you, and even your children will not be too good to you. In the face of money, family affection is likely to lose.
Of course, this is not absolute, but relative. If children are particularly filial, then naturally they will not look at their parents' money and be human.
However, the vast majority of people in this world are "bustling" profit-seeking people. This determines that most people will look at the interests of money to behave.
Is this the right thing to do? In the face of money, people can still die for money, how can they care about so-called morality? This is particularly chilling.
For children, it is better to attach importance to family affection. At least, the money can be earned again, and the parents can become parents and children with us, which is the fate cultivated for many lifetimes. Cherish it.
04
Overly contrived old people will be rejected by their children.
What is an overly contrived old man? These two examples, I believe we are very clear - Xie Guangkun and Su Daqiang.
When an old man is overly contrived and sacrifices the interests of his children for himself, then they will be disgusted by their children and even stimulate the contradictions of the family.
Uncle Yang in the village was an extremely selfish person when he was young, and he once did the work of abandoning his wife and children in order to escape debts. Now that he is old, he also needs his children to take care of.
The children and their wives also feel that although Uncle Yang has done such a bad thing, he is a relative after all and is worth cherishing. However, Uncle Yang still exerted his selfish nature to the extreme.
He always squeezed the child's money and always forced the child to do what he did not want. If the child goes against his will, then he will say that the child is not filial, so as to restrain the child.
In the end, the family was still full of contradictions.
In fact, as an old man in the family, it is better to lead by example and keep your own principles. You know, over-contrived, that's the beginning of being rejected.
05
The elderly who are estranged from their children will be rejected.
Why is there such a great contradiction between children and parents? Because of the estrangement, but also because of the problem of ideology and concept.
When there is a conflict between the parent's thoughts and the children's thoughts, it is believed that there will be irresolvable contradictions between them. In this way, parents will hate their children, and children will dislike their parents.
At the same time, because parents and children are too close, the "hedgehog effect" in psychology will appear.
So, what should parents and children do to avoid huge conflicts?
As an old man, you should be less contrived and not too selfish, but you need to think from the perspective of a child. At the same time, it is also necessary to maintain a certain distance from the child and avoid mutual harm.
And the children? It is not easy to be considerate of parents. Just imagine, we also have the day of aging, so why can't we stand in the perspective of our parents and think more for our parents?
Disgust, that's a matter of human nature. And cherishing the existing family affection is a matter of responsibility and morality. People still need to overcome certain human weaknesses in order to assume their own responsibilities.
Wen/Shushan has deer