1, there is a young woman in the unit, divorced for two years, I thought about whether I could chase her in hand, one night I went directly to her house. She was having dinner alone, and when she saw me, she smiled and asked

1, there is a young woman in the unit, divorced for two years, I thought about whether I could chase her in hand, one night I went directly to her house. She was eating dinner alone, and when she saw me, she smiled and asked, can you have some wine? I said that I can drink a little, but it is the amount of three or two. She smiled and said, that's much better than me, and I'll have a drink. I smiled and said, then the two of us who can't drink well are drinking together, and it won't be long before we get drunk. She didn't care, she said, get drunk! As a result, before the bottle of liquor was finished, we couldn't do it. Two red clouds rose from her cheeks, and her eyes were confused, as if there were two pools of wine hidden inside. I also don't have the old reservedness and Sven, I looked at her directly and said, I like you for a long time, would you like to be my girlfriend? You give me a word. She shook her head and said, I don't want to be your girlfriend. I was extremely disappointed to hear that. Shaky ready to leave. But she grabbed me and said, I'm going to be your wife.?

2, I was working overtime at the company at night, my girlfriend suddenly called me and said: Let's break up. My mood instantly hit rock bottom, we talked for three years, and suddenly said we were going to break up. I was just about to call and ask why I wanted to break up, when my girlfriend called again and said that she had just made a mistake. I said well, we have been talking for three years, how can we say that the points are divided, it must be a mistake.

3. After dinner, I was driven out of the computer by my mother to lose weight. I walked around the downstairs of the community twice and felt that life was meaningless. Just passing by McDonald's discount, I went in and bought another burger. I said: Ask for a burger. Clerk: Do you want to come with a piece of fries? I remembered that I still had to lose weight, and I said: No, thank you. The clerk listened, and suddenly sighed: after taking off his clothes, his body was chopped up, and he struggled in the hot oil hell, even if he slowly became soft and collapsed, just to hear a sentence "very delicious" and gritted his teeth and insisted, but once he sold the remaining fries that would be dumped immediately, what kind of life did he have! I was stunned: there is no killing without buying and selling.

4, a girl at the entrance of the mall kneeling for two steamed buns and the way home cost 40 yuan, sister kindness dafa went to the supermarket to buy two steamed buns for the girl, the girl saw the steamed buns all kinds of moving gobble ah, a see this should really encounter difficulties, decisively give her 50 yuan, and then go shopping. After a while I went to another mall and saw her kneeling there asking for money, all kinds of anger, determined to retaliate, so I bought 20 steamed buns to follow her!

5, dad is a typical "wife management strict", my dad's salary will be handed over to my mother every month, my father wants to save a private money, and can only take advantage of the time to buy vegetables. On this day, when dad took out his mobile phone, he accidentally dropped the mobile phone on the ground, and the mobile phone case was also broken, and a lot of change was scattered from it. Mom looked at the change on the ground and said, "Yo, the phone bill has fallen out!" ”

6. When my mother-in-law put the family bracelet on my wrist, my heart was happy and worried... Hurriedly pulled the boyfriend aside and shook him hard! Holding his mobile phone and letting him see the WeChat he sent me in the morning, he wrote: "The first time you came to my house, my mother is ready to give you the ancestral table of our family. Then I whispered, "What should I do, your husband is still waiting downstairs in a van?" ”

7. A foreigner came to the village and got lost when he was ready to go back. At night, foreigners could not find the hotel, so they knocked on the door of a farmhouse. An old lady in the room asked aloud, "Who are you?" The foreigner said: "Ilichova Mopolov Kriravich!" The old lady said angrily, "No, there are too many of you!" Then "slammed" the door that had just opened!???

8. Tonight at the school reunion, I went with the high-imitation Hermès bag that my boyfriend bought for me. As a result, the waiter accidentally spilled red wine on my bag, the waiter shivered and sorted out for half a day to no avail, and the person in charge was ready to deal with the waiter and compensate me. I thought that the bag was high imitation, so I generously said: It's okay, he didn't mean it!! At that time, I felt that I was super faceless, and when I went home, I showed my boyfriend a little, and my boyfriend told me that the bag was real, not high imitation!!

9. When I played Shake a week ago, I met a girl and talked to her for a whole week. When I left work today, my wife asked me to buy a fish to go back to, saying that there were customers at home. When I got home, I found a little sister in the house, and my wife said that she had just moved in next door. At the time of dinner, the little sister looked at me and smiled, and then she opened the V letter and said to her wife: Sister, you see, this uncle who touched me on the V letter is like your husband!

10. The sister-in-law sold 10 cars in the 4S store, and the company gave a commission of 2 million yuan. After work, the sister-in-law generously invited colleagues to eat at a five-star hotel, but she did not expect that she was drunk when the amount of alcohol was not good. When she woke up the next morning, her sister-in-law found her mouth full of dirt. So she angrily called her colleague to ask about yesterday's situation, and the colleague told her: You have to say that you are a sheep, rush to the park and start nibbling grass, the 5 men in our company can't stop you.

11. I met a brother who lives in Inner Mongolia, he fell in love with a sister, and today he wants to have a romantic proposal. The young man rode to the edge of the cliff and said to his girlfriend, "Can you marry me, if you don't marry me, I don't have any point in living, just jump off this cliff." The girlfriend was touched and shouted at the young man, "Marry." Then the horse roared down the cliff...?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #