At the end of last year, I bought a house, borrowed all my relatives and friends, and there was a difference of 50,000, just when I was at a loss, the female colleague in the office lent me and promised to pay her back within a year. Today sent a bonus, I will

At the end of last year, I bought a house, borrowed all my relatives and friends, and there was a difference of 50,000, just when I was at a loss, the female colleague in the office lent me and promised to pay her back within a year. Today sent a bonus, I added 5000 interest to pay her back, she insisted on no interest, Alipay turned back, said: "Interest does not charge you, you help me a favor, can you?" I was already embarrassed, and quickly agreed: "No problem, as long as I can do it, you can mention it." Female colleague: "You can absolutely do it, then you are not allowed to regret it." I only bought a station ticket for the New Year, and Chinese New Year's Eve you will drive me back to my hometown that day." "Oh my God, her request is a bit embarrassing to me, her hometown is 800 kilometers away from my home, send her back to that I can't Chinese New Year's Eve food, and then Chinese New Year's Eve that day my hometown also introduced a girl waiting for me to go back to the blind date." I thought about it: "This is a bit difficult, why don't you change it?" "She's angry now, saying I don't count what I say, what should I do?"

2. I'm a project manager at an IT company that makes over $20,000 a month, but this morning I went through something that made me start to doubt myself. Passing by a breakfast shop this morning on my way to work, I saw a young man arguing with the owner of the hand-cuffed cake seller. He said, "You said you would add three eggs to me, why do you only add two?" The boss said helplessly: "I am adding three to you!" Man: "You're a fool, a black-hearted vendor, an egg has to be pitted, and you should sell hand-grabbed cakes for the rest of your life!" Boss: "I make thirty or forty thousand a month and will lie to you about an egg?" Go away, this pie is for you! "After listening, I don't want to be a manager, I am still suitable for buying hand-grabbed cakes."

3. My wife kept complaining that I hadn't taken off the floor and said that I couldn't even drag the floor. I feel that anger in my heart, this stinky woman knows to play mobile phones all day, she doesn't dare to work herself, and dares to pick bones in eggs! I threw the pot decisively and said, "I'll let you eat!" Whoever goes to buy the pot is the puppy! The wife also said angrily: Ok! You're talking about that! I roared: That's what I said! To say that this mother-in-law is really cruel, call my father in the afternoon to let my father buy a new pot...

4. I have been married to my husband for four years, and we also have the crystallization of love for our precious girlfriend. The girl is three years old this year, and today is the first time my brother taught her how to use chopsticks. The girl is very serious about learning, she uses chopsticks to clip the dumplings in the plate, the dumplings slip around, and they can't always be clamped. Worried that she was discouraged, and was trying to encourage two sentences, her eyes were shining, and her face was full of surnames and she said to me: Mom, look, dumplings are skating! We don't understand the world of children.

5. The brother-in-law has not found a partner because of his stupid mouth, and the old man has introduced him to a flight attendant blind date. The two had a very happy chat, and the brother-in-law was very excited, and he wanted to light a cigarette to calm his mood. He picked up bentley's key on the table and lit a cigarette. The flight attendant immediately turned her head and left, swearing and grinning as she left! The brother-in-law was very surprised, thinking that she might not like men who smoke...

6. After the collapse of Regal Corporation, he went insane and was sent to a psychiatric hospital. After ten years of meticulous planning, the rich man finally took advantage of the dark wind and high night of a month to escape. As a result, the next day, the rich man found the dean and confessed everything truthfully. The dean was very strange and asked him: You have already gone out, why do you want to come back? The rich man said: I had a hard time returning home, and my wife said to me: Death Gem! It's been 1 hour since you got out of the mental hospital, where have you been during this time...

7. A brother has been a school grass level figure since he was a child, because he divorced his ex-wife because of drinking, but my sister-in-law was fascinated by his appearance, and he did not marry! After the two got married, I didn't know what method my sister-in-law used to make my brothers obedient, and I went home after work every day without drinking. One day we drank wine together and ate crayfish, peeling shrimp by hand. The sister-in-law called, and the buddy only pressed the speakerphone. I heard my sister-in-law say on the phone: "You only know how to drink, and the lights at home are broken again." "My brother stood up and left as soon as he heard that, not knowing why.

8. My girlfriend's school is next door, and I don't stop playing with her after the military training. Who knew that she thought I was too tanned, afraid that her friends would laugh and be too lazy to accompany me! A man stood lost on the community square, leaning against the bronze statue next to him and looking ahead. My heart could not be calmed for a long time: Am I really that dark? A guy looked at me, looked around at no one, and "snapped" a small advertisement on the door of my head.

  #Funny# #搞笑段子 #