1. Once on a train sleeper, the upper bunk was a young woman, a thief who looked beautiful. At night, there were only two of us in the whole train room, and the young woman seemed to be a little frightened, so she climbed down from above, and then said to me, you are a good person at first glance, you should not have any thoughts about me, right? I was surprised and said, good people also like beautiful women, you look so beautiful, I have ideas about you is a very normal thing. The beautiful woman said helplessly, then do you have a wife? I shook my head and said, I haven't married yet, and she asked again, do you have a girlfriend? I shook my head and said my first love was still there. She sighed and said, this is deep in the middle of the night, there are only two of us in the whole sleeper private room, you will definitely bully me, forget it, I will still be your girlfriend directly. I have a girlfriend for no reason, and I am quite dizzy, but this is also very good, and finally ended the single state. After getting off the train, I took her to a big meal, bought her jewelry bags and clothes, and her mood was obviously better, she smiled and said, I didn't expect you to be rich. I shook my head and said, I have worked for so many years, I have only saved tens of thousands of dollars, and today I spent all of it on you. She looked at me with a complicated look and said, You are really good to me, but your money has been spent, what should we do in the future? It's impossible to drink the northwest wind, right?
2. A few days ago, the school flower and the class teacher got married and invited me and a few classmates to be bridesmaids. Then the groom led the brotherhood to pick up the kiss, and when everyone was rushing to kiss, suddenly a handsome man came out with a bouquet of flowers and knelt in front of me. My mom, happiness came too suddenly and a little confused, and I was about to pick up the flowers. The handsome man opened his eyes and said: I'm sorry, I recognized the wrong person...
3. The rich merchant married an actress, and after the marriage, the two went to Bali for their honeymoon. Back at the door a month later, the rich merchant touched his pocket: "Oh, the key to the house is missing!" The actress said unhappily: "I know you are careless, this is not, I deliberately hid it when I went out." The rich merchant was instantly relieved: "Great, hurry up and open the door." The actress said sheepishly, "But I hid it in a drawer in the house." ”?
4. Take the 82-year-old xo that I have treasured for many years to the hospital to visit my father-in-law who has just finished chemotherapy. After drinking, the father-in-law was refreshed and started eating chicken. The mother-in-law told him to clean up, he did not move, the mother-in-law was angry, and ignored him for 3 days. The father-in-law really couldn't stand the cold violence, so he said to his mother-in-law: Can I help you empty your Taobao shopping cart? Don't get angry! The mother-in-law immediately agreed. My father-in-law and I looked at it, 100,000. The father-in-law said angrily: What do these losers buy a day! 100,000 pieces! Later, we took a closer look, and 49 of the 50 things were bought for me and my father-in-law: slippers, pajamas, eye masks and so on! The mother-in-law just bought her an 80,000 8 bag...?
5. The sister-in-law has just returned from xinjiang to support the teaching, and the mother-in-law is particularly distressed, and takes her to the vegetable market early in the morning to buy delicious food. Arriving at a young man's vegetable stall, the mother-in-law asked, "How do you sell this cabbage?" The young man said: "1 piece 6 a pound." Mother-in-law: "It's too expensive!" Don't sell for 1 piece 2! The young man looked at the little sister-in-law who looked like a flower and said, "I sell you this dish at a purchase price, if I earn you a little older money, I am your son!" At this time, the mother-in-law said: "Oh, the idea of beating my daughter?" No way! Go, change one..."?
6. Today I went with my wife to eat crazy grilled wings, because my wife was afraid of being spicy to her for the first time, so she ordered pretzel and salt roasted wings, and she had to eat them and didn't listen to anything. I told my wife that this eclipse was really fierce, and she was very excited to say that she wanted to order this taste. When the waiter brought the grilled wings up, I said to her: Wife, you take a small bite first! The wife did not listen, and took a big bite. In an instant, the wife suddenly began to wrap her head and keep shaking around, and I asked: What's wrong? The second wife replied: Stealing spicy hemp!?
7. I met a girl online, made an appointment to meet her a few days ago, and directly established a relationship. Happy that night, celebrating with friends over a drink, holding a photo is a show off. After drinking, several people staggered back, and suddenly a friend slapped me a few times: "That's not your girlfriend?" I was stunned, and took a closer look, holding a girl who was an old man of about fifty years old, and it was really her. I exploded at once, rushing over with a flying kick, and the old man directly lay on the ground and scratched out. Dashingly turned to leave, suddenly heard his girlfriend shouting: "Dad, are you okay?" "Am I running now, or am I going to turn around and say I'm sorry?"
8. The professor sits opposite the farmer on the train. When bored, the professor said: I have a problem, if you don't know, give me 5 yuan; If you come up with a question, if I don't know, I will give you 500 yuan, how? Farmers agree. PROFESSOR: How far is the Moon from Earth? The farmer did not say a word and handed the professor 5 yuan. The farmer asked: Three legs up the mountain, four legs down the mountain, what kind of animal? The professor was puzzled and had no choice but to give the farmer 500 yuan. The farmer took the money and prepared to sleep. The professor asked: What is the animal with three legs up the mountain and four legs down the mountain? The farmer didn't say a word, handed the professor 5 yuan, and went to sleep! Low education and high IQ, too terrible!
#Funny Moment#Funny Paragraph# #年度搞笑名场面 #
A wave of wonderful GIFs to !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
