Text: Zheng Shaoyuan May my words warm you
-01-
Teacher Tu Lei, an emotional expert, once described marriage like this:
Marriage is not a matter of two people, it is a matter of two families. The older generation's talk of being right at home is not an unreasonable feudal idea. When you get married, you should have the belief that you only have one time in your life, so you don't have to be sloppy when choosing. In love, think of it as love. Get married, take your time.
In recent years, there has been a very classic saying circulating on the Internet: marry a wife without marrying Voldemort, and marrying someone without marrying a phoenix man. Why are these two types of people so criticized? One is because of their own reasons, and the other is because the door-to-door factor is inside.
In the past, when we talked about the phoenix man, many times it was still full of praise, because the phoenix man was after all a representative of hard work, and at that time, whether it was parents or many girls, they were happy to choose the phoenix man and fight for a good future with each other.
But now, the phoenix man has become just trying to use his own name and soar with the help of marriage. But in this marriage, these people are stingy and unwilling to give anything, and sometimes even hurt the girls, just to achieve their own goals, so that the woman's family can help themselves unconditionally.
But girls are not fools, and today's society is no longer like ancient times, and girls and women's families will most likely choose to quit marriage when they find the man's deception, and they also want to maintain the happiness of their daughters in the second half of their lives. And like these phoenix men who are full of calculation and very selfish, they can only lift a stone and drop their feet in the end, and people and money are empty.
-02-
Reader Ling Hui has a special respect for the door-to-door household, because she ate the door in her last marriage and did not lose money to this, so now she eats a long and wise.
Speaking of the last marriage, Ling Hui still has palpitations. Her ex-husband, Dong Liang, is an uncompromising phoenix man. The marriage between the two people lasted for nearly three years, and during these three years, Ling Hui lived a very painful life, and she felt that it was not a marriage, but that she was "helping the poor".
Women who marry phoenix men will more or less encounter this situation, that is, "poverty alleviation marriage". In this marriage model, the feelings between husband and wife will quickly fade or even deteriorate, and the marriage will be in jeopardy.
Ling Hui's family is well-off, her parents are civil servants, she is an only daughter, from childhood to adulthood is the pearl in the palm of the family, her parents are very fond of her, and do their best to give her the best. It is precisely because of the protection of her parents that Ling Hui's personality is relatively naïve.
Dong Liang, on the other hand, came from a poor family, and according to the current point of view, he was a phoenix man. He was born in a very poor rural area since he was a child, and he knew that only by studying hard could he get rid of his current life and make his parents and relatives live a good life.
-03-
So he worked very his studies since he was a child, and his parents also thought that he was very difficult, so they never let him drop out of school, but always provided him with college.
Because of his understanding of his family's conditions, Dong Liang also knows how much effort his parents need to make in order to provide for his own schooling, so when he was in school, he has always worked very hard, and almost every year in the school scholarship has his name.
And in order to be able to find a good job immediately after graduating from college, Dong Liang often uses his spare time to go out and work part-time when he is in college.
Although Dong Liang would go out to work part-time every time he put on a job, this did not make his studies fall because of this. Therefore, when Dong Liang graduated from college, he also quickly went to work in a good unit because of his excellence, under the recommendation of the school.
Compared with his peers, Dong Liang has a mature and stable personality, can bear hardships and stand hard work, has self-motivation, and has a more prominent work ability, and has been promoted and raised in just a few years.
But dongliang wants to take root in the city is still very difficult, because his original family is too poor, the high housing prices in the city have made him unaffordable. Most of his monthly salary is paid to his parents to pay off debts.
-04-
After being with Ling Hui, Dong Liang gained a foothold in the city by relying on Ling Hui's family.
When the two people got married, Dong Liang said that his family was poor, he couldn't afford to buy a house, and he couldn't afford to give a bride price, but he had a heart that loved Ling Hui. The simple Ling Hui believed Dong Liang's words, and even if there was no room and no bride price, she married Dong Liang.
Not only that, Ling Hui's parents could not bear to see their daughter and Dong Liang suffer together, so they married a house, but the name of the house was Ling Hui's parents. Moreover, he also married a sum of money, which was 200,000 yuan, which was a dowry for Ling Hui.
Ling Hui, who has just married, is full of confidence in the future, and she feels that as long as the two people work together, they will definitely live a prosperous life. Dong Liang also said that he would definitely work hard to make money and let Ling Hui live a good life.
But life has never been a two-sentence slogan, a poisonous oath can become good, it requires people's efforts, it may have a chance to get better.
The days after marriage were no different from before, Dong Liang was still busy working all day and had little time to accompany Ling Hui. All the housework in the family Dong Liang will not help, all rely on Ling Hui alone.
-05-
Sometimes Ling Hui wondered what the meaning of this married life was, she served him like Dong Liang's nanny, and he was a working machine that did nothing but work. Other men would be romantic, caring, and not seen in him at all.
Since the two people got married, Dong Liang's parents and siblings have called every three to five minutes to ask for money, and Jiang Li is irritable about this, but Dong Liang said to Jiang Li: "I am the hope of my whole family, I am living so well now, of course, I should help them unconditionally." ”
And less than a year after marriage, Dong Liang took his mother over. The arrival of the mother-in-law made this not rich family even worse.
In the following days, the mother-in-law watched Ling Hui never do housework, and always criticized Ling Hui in a yin and yang manner, and Dong Liang never spoke for Ling Hui, but only comforted her mother-in-law vigorously, and once even followed her mother-in-law's words and said that she wanted to clean up Ling Hui.
Ling Hui was furious on the spot, "Who are you going to take care of?" Isn't that all you promised me? Now that your mother has changed, do you really want to live with me? ”
As soon as Ling Hui finished speaking, her mother-in-law directly turned her head to scold Ling Hui, "That's how you talk to your man, do you know that you are a daughter-in-law?" Doing housework is what it should be. ”
-06-
Dong Liang blindly tolerates his mother, has always complained that Jiang Li does not respect his mother, and asked Jiang Li to honor her mother-in-law more in the future. However, the mother-in-law often deliberately made it difficult for Jiang Li, but Dong Liang ignored it.
Dong Liang's words that often hang on his lips are: That is my mother, you marry me is your mother, you have to be as filial to her as I am. Whatever she does you should be inclusive. In the face of this foolish filial piety man, Jiang Li was simply speechless.
Not only that, Dong Liang has also been coveting the property of the Ling Hui family, he feels that Ling Hui is an only child, that is, the family, and in the future, her family's property will be his own. So he tried everything to get Ling Hui to go back to her mother's house and ask for money.
But Ling Hui had lost hope in him, and his marriage was shaky, and he didn't listen to him at all. The two people often quarreled, and that time in the quarrel, Dong Liang even gave Ling Hui a slap: Your family's property is mine, hurry back to your mother's house to ask for money, otherwise I will kill you!
Looking at this phoenix man who ate soft rice and hard food, Ling Hui suddenly felt that she was too much of a failure, so she suddenly made up her mind that she wanted to divorce this phoenix man!
Ling Hui returned to her mother's house and told her parents about it. The parents were angry, so they found a lawyer and drafted the divorce agreement. Only wait for Dong Liang to come back and handle the divorce procedures.
-07-
Ling Hui's mother was overjoyed to hear that her daughter was going to divorce this phoenix man. Immediately contacted a blind date to ling hui to know.
Dong Liang was in his hometown these days, Ling Hui and this blind date met several times, and they felt that each other was not bad.
When Dong Liang came home, he found that his belongings had already been packed up by Ling Hui and placed at the door. A divorce contract awaits him. That day, Ling Hui's blind date helped her and was also present. So the scene was unusually awkward.
Dong Liang's mentality collapsed on the spot, he didn't expect that Ling Hui really wanted to divorce himself, and his daughter already had a new father!
He begged Ling Hui not to divorce him, but Ling Hui was already disgusted with him, insisted on divorcing him, and kicked him out of his house.
In fact, the door is really important for marriage, two people have similar family backgrounds, common hobbies and ideas will be the same, and there will be no contradictions caused by material things. Therefore, I would like to advise everyone here that when choosing a mate, we must pay attention to this factor.
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