When I went to the hospital for an injection, a nurse sister was stunned that she had not been pricked three times, and when she was ready to pierce the fourth time, she hesitated, and then put down the needle and said to me: You wait. And then went. I thought I was finally replaced, but after a while a nurse came in and said, "It was just an intern." Are you stupid when I am? Before the mask, Qi Bangs, now have to take the mask, Qi Bangs with a clip to the side, you think so I don't know you ah? Isn't the work permit still the same!!!
2, a good friend did a mother some time ago, very happy, the original friend said, said that after giving birth to a baby, in the circle of friends often send pictures. But it's been a few months, and I haven't seen her update, so I asked her: Why didn't I have a picture of a baby??? The friend replied: It's too ugly, I was going to show it to you when I was going to look better, but I didn't expect that he had been getting ugly, and he had always been so ugly.
3, today with a new acquaintance of the big mother to eat, the big mother for my various likes, the banquet to my various praise, I secretly proud, haha, I am indeed the best daughter-in-law candidate for middle-aged and elderly women! So I talked with my aunt about all kinds. At the end of the day, the big aunt took my hand and fell in love, and the big mother said: Girl, you are like my daughter, you are all square faces, five big and three thick, looking at it makes people like. Big Mom, how much you love your daughter!
4, last night walking the dog, because the fog was lost, called his wife, the wife said: Old nine, are you stupid? Our dog definitely knows the way, you spread the dog leash and follow it home! I thought it was right, so I shouted, Go to Pikachu! Don't say that this cargo is running really fast, and then I am the only one who gets lost...
5, I remember that I graduated last year when I just went to work only about 120 pounds, the weekend rest home, today there is no rice at home, my mother told me to go to the rice shop to get rice, saw the boss scale on the side, itchy heart so to the boss to call the rice scale on a battle, dizzy, 149 pounds! "Boss, you are really black, called fake, called 120 149 pounds!" Boss: "Wronged, my name is used to buy goods!" You're more than 149 pounds, come down! ”
6, a rich man to travel abroad, in order to show their wealth, specially chose a five-star hotel to live. But to his surprise, the people here didn't seem to care that he was a rich man. So, while having breakfast, he deliberately shouted, "Waiter, bring a breakfast of fifty francs for my pet." The waiter came over and said, "Sir, we don't sell half breakfast here." ”
7, the sister-in-law has offended many people because of her outspokenness, and each job is not long-lasting. That time, the sister-in-law went to a new company for an interview. Interviewer: "Sister, remember to dare to express your opinion at any time!" Sister-in-law: "Thank you for your encouragement!" Then I'll just say it..." Interviewer: "Yes, you can just say it boldly!" Sister-in-law: "Haha! Look at your big bald head! You look too much like a brine egg! ”
8. One day, the chairman was interviewed by the host of the financial program: You have been doing good silently all these years and have never preached it. Chairman: If there is anything to say about this, I also take it from the people, so I should use it for the people... Host: What a philanthropist with a sense of public morality! The chairman secretly laughed in his heart, his harsh subordinates' salaries, with these money donated, not only to establish a social image, but also to reduce part of the tax, it is really a double win!
9, no umbrella next to the person with an umbrella, no matter how close you can not hide from the rain, but more wet. It is better to hide far away, even if there is no umbrella, there are rainy days. Even if you don't get close, you can have your own sunny world. ——Zhang Ailing
10, the refrigerator at home was broken a few days ago, and today a new refrigerator was added to the home. After returning from work yesterday, I felt particularly hungry, habitually opened the refrigerator door to see, nothing! So I complained to my mother: Why don't you put anything in your refrigerator? Is this worthy of a refrigerator? What about its dignity? You make it impossible to lift its head in front of other refrigerators! My mother said without looking up: it can say that it is a big wardrobe.
1 Netizen: Once my girlfriend and I went out on a trip, because I was not married, so I had to take the car back to each other's homes at night. I walked over to the ticket office and asked: Is there any ticket to Shanghai? Conductor: Yes. So I ran over to my girlfriend and said, "No, what to do." The girlfriend didn't believe it, ran over and asked again. When I came back, I said to me: It's really gone, what to do.
12. When I was studying for graduate school at the Polytechnic University, there was a roommate who looked ugly, but especially liked to buy clothes. Yesterday, the housemate bought a floral long dress on the night of the fight, and the seller said that the above picture was praised and immediately cashed back five yuan, so the roommate put on the clothes and took five photos with confidence and beauty. Today the seller gave the roommate a cashback of ten yuan, let her delete the picture... (Source: Network) Comment: How to relieve worries, only paragraphs.
13, my wife got a worry after pregnancy, she worried that after giving birth, I would be cold and cold to her! I took her hand affectionately and said: My heart is not only stone, my heart is not only rolled, but love is rooted in the bottom of my heart, and I will not move in this life! She was so touched that she immediately hugged me. I asked: Honey, what do you want to eat, and see if your husband buys it for you! She said shyly: Baby, I want to eat sour these two days! After saying that, she held my head, nibbled lightly at my cheek, and smiled: Sure enough, it is a sour Xiucai who chews on the words, it is really sour!
14. That year, the matchmaker introduced a girl to Fa Xiao. After meeting, he did not look at the blind date woman, but he looked at the sister who accompanied the woman. Afterwards, Fa Xiao urinated on the crazy pursuit of the girl, and finally won it after twists and turns. At the betrothed feast, the blind date woman also came. Fa Xiao said to her with some embarrassment: Thank you for still coming to bless me, at first only blamed us for having no luck. The woman said: Originally it was your wife who was on a blind date, she had to let me play ugly and evil you...
![Westerners' beliefs are most often equated with a form of political correctness. No matter how ugly and sinful his words and deeds may be, as long as he says: I believe in God, I believe in God! It seemed like an instant he was[fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)