1. The female secretary is pregnant, the boss lets her run away, and the female secretary insists on returning to her hometown in Gansu to give birth. Before leaving, the female secretary said to the boss: "How to notify you when something happened?" "Boss:"Zhang postcard to give

1. The female secretary is pregnant, the boss lets her run away, and the female secretary insists on returning to her hometown in Gansu to give birth. Before leaving, the female secretary said to the boss: "How to notify you when something happened?" "Boss:"Zhang postcard to me, written on, Lanzhou ramen. "A few months later, the boss got off work, his wife handed a postcard, the boss fainted after taking it, and was taken to the hospital. The doctor asked: What stimulated the shock past? The wife said: I looked at a postcard and fell down. The doctor took the postcard and read: Four bowls of Lanzhou ramen; two bowls with sausages, two bowls without...

2. I haven't found a boyfriend in a long time because I'm too fat, and I'm hungry and thirsty. So I made up my mind that every day I would lose weight and then from 200 pounds to 100 pounds. After losing weight successfully, I deliberately went downstairs to the male god company and had a chance encounter with him. He saw that my jaw was about to fall off in surprise, and said in shock: I always thought that if you lost weight, it would look a lot better, but I didn't expect that you were ugly than before, it seems that you are born ugly, and it really has nothing to do with obesity.

3. I went shopping with my girlfriend, and my girlfriend said to me: I recently lost 50 pounds of weight. I was surprised and said: No, I don't see how much weight you have lost? The girlfriend said: Since you don't believe it, I will show it to you. Then I walked quickly to the electronic scale of the pharmacy next to me, but found that the display screen light was not on after standing up, nor did it display numbers. After trying this several times, the girlfriend ran into the pharmacy angrily and said: Your scales are broken, why are they still placed at the door? The salesman said quietly: That's our induction cooker...

4. My husband stole my ID card and borrowed 1200 yuan and bought two soft Chinese. After I knew it, I was particularly angry and had a fight with my husband. By dinner the next morning, my husband and I ignored each other. My son immediately said to me, "Mom, did you quarrel with your father last night?" Don't be angry, I'm on your side, remember, my son is helping you, you can't learn from others like that to argue and not win the child out of anger! ”

5. Because I borrowed an online loan, I was forced to go to the electronics factory next to Foxconn to work, and the female team leader and I were all foreigners, and the huge dormitory building was where we both lived. At about 3:30 a.m. that day, I was sleeping soundly and was suddenly awakened by a knock at the door. When she opened the door, she saw the female group leader in her pajamas, and she said: Can I sleep here with you? Just came out to go to the toilet and locked the door. I nodded and said, "You sleep, I'll go to sleep in my workshop." The next day, when I saw the female team leader's gloomy eyes, I finally knew why I didn't have a girlfriend.

6. Go to the driving school to practice, the coach pointed to the pond and said: "A few years ago, there was a woman, who reported to the driving school, could not distinguish between the throttle and the brake, and directly led a car into the pond." The group below began to laugh, and at this moment, the coach pointed at me and said, "I didn't expect that this year she came again!" ”

7. Fa Xiao asked me to eat hot pot, saying that there were two bottles of Moutai wine, and we finished eating and played mahjong on the side of the stage. Having a good time, the wife suddenly video chats and checks the post!!!!!!!! I quickly went to the table where the hot pot was placed, picked up the spoon, and opened the video: "Wife, I am eating hot pot!!!!!!!! Wife: "You spoon the soup with a spoon!!!!!!!! "The soup is real, I'm not afraid of the stuffing, I scooped up a mouthful of soup and drank it." Wife: "You went to play mahjong, didn't you??" The boldness is getting bigger!!!!!!!! The spoons were all illuminated!!!!!!!! ”

8. Take your son to a restaurant near the community for dinner on weekends. As soon as he entered the door, his son whispered: Mom, there is only one person in this restaurant to eat, and there are many empty seats to sit on! Me: If you say that, the owner will be unhappy to hear it!! The son nodded and said loudly: Wow, Mom, there are a lot of people here, there are no seats... Before he could finish speaking, the only person who ate was so frightened that he ran away!!

9. Why are you men's cigarettes so expensive!? A pack of Zhonghua costs sixty or seventy yuan. I bought a cabbage for two and a half today, a handful of greens for two, a piece of meat for nine and eight, a bag of bamboo shoots for six yuan, two pineapples for six yuan, a hearty dinner only cost twenty or so, you send a circle of smoke a few times and it will be gone! #Funny##Funny Funny##Funny Humor Anecdotes#[666] Please leave your valuable likes, that's what motivates me to continue to be happy.