The daughter-in-law is the only daughter in the family and has never entered the kitchen since she was a child. The day after I got married, in order to show that I was very virtuous, I went to the market to buy a fish and sauerkraut and prepare to make a pot of water

The daughter-in-law is the only daughter in the family and has never entered the kitchen since she was a child. The day after I got married, in order to show that I was very virtuous, I went to the market to buy a fish and sauerkraut, prepared to make a pot of boiled fish, and called me at noon to let me go home for dinner. When I got home, my daughter-in-law brought up a pot and said: Husband, do you taste it, do you see if it is fresh? I burst into tears: You see the fish is still swimming in the pot, can it not be fresh?

2, working outside for several months did not come home, came home at night, full of food and drink and mom and dad in the living room to watch TV, dad suddenly asked: "Baby, what to eat tomorrow at noon?" I replied casually, "Boiled fish." My dad said lightly, "Come on, I'll ask your mom." ”

3, shortly after the new marriage, my wife and I went to my parents-in-law's house and found that my father-in-law also likes to play games! Therefore, we both often opened the black when we were idle. Tonight, I played games with my father-in-law. He was blind and wild, and I was on a crocodile order. As a result, I was blown up by the opposite single Rexton, the record was 0-7, and my father-in-law was angry and scolded me. Then I asked my father-in-law to help me catch a wave, and he came. As a result, I made a big move, and we both sent a wave of double kills. My father-in-law was so angry that he scolded me: You are an orphan!

4, yesterday with my wife played she screwed me, I gently twisted her. As a result, she pouted and said: You didn't fight back before you didn't love me! I teased her: It's like I'm fishing, and the fish are biting the hook. There is no need to play the nest and take the bait. As a result, this woman threw all my fishing gear downstairs! Then gave me a slap and shouted: tell you to fish, call you fish! Believe it or not, the old lady turned into a great white shark in seconds and ate you!

5, Jiaodong people when and where are indispensable to a variety of seafood, in the New Year, in addition to the refrigerator full of a variety of frozen seafood, especially Jiaodong people like mackerel, what sweet dried mackerel, smoked mackerel, are Chinese New Year's Eve in the rice of the regular customers. The production process of smoked mackerel is very laborious, but the smoked mackerel meat is fresh and sweet, the fish bones are crisp, and you will know that the year is coming again after eating it.

6, I remember when I was a child, new year's day, my family members came to my house to eat, as a chef Dad sat on a table of good dishes, especially the fish, everyone ate praise, on the five-year-old I clipped a piece of fish scales and said: Dad, you did not pick up this fish, next time pay attention to ah! Who said that when you are old, you can't be beaten, that's because you don't have the method. That night, my father beat me up because I drank too little water.

7, once with my cousin fishing in the river, my cousin smoked, he smoked a cigarette we chatted about the day, wait, wait! Suddenly the fish floated, and I rushed over to pull it decisively! What a big one! Pull on the surface of the water that the fish and the fishing rod are shaking! My cousin also hurried over to help me unravel the fish! Who knew that the fishing line just touched the cigarette in his mouth and broke it! We can only watch the fish fall directly into the water!

8, friends just called and cried, he spent 3,000 oceans on a whim to buy a koi, almost a pound and a half of it, the family fish tank has not been used for a long time, want to wait for the evening to go home to brush again and then put in the fish tank, first put the fish in the kitchen basin at night back home, ask the daughter-in-law what about the fish? The daughter-in-law said happily: Let's eat fish for dinner!

9. There is a passage in "The Count of Monte Cristo". Monte Cristo wants to show off his wealth, take two fish, an Italian one, and a Russian one, and bring it to the table at the same time, saying" Brother, I can gather these two strange fish. When others had questions, he said that I still had a living one in my kitchen. Why? "Because of the precaution to die." This is the typical "have money, buy two bottles of soda, drink one bottle, and see one bottle." "Waste? Excessive? That's what luxury really means. What everyone enjoys is the pleasure of this sin.

10. The Queen Mother is compassionate and often buys some fish to release by the human river. On this day, the Queen Mother came to release her life as usual. An uncle stepped forward and persuaded, "Big Lady, don't release this grass carp in the future!" You can release raw carp! The Queen Mother wondered, "Is there anything special about releasing raw fish?" The uncle said kindly: "Every time I eat grass carp, my daughter-in-law wants to change the taste!" ”

1 Early in the morning, my mother knocked on my door and asked me how I had sent red envelopes to myself. I said, "Mom, you can really play." Mom sighed and said: On my birthday, no one sent me a red envelope, I sent myself to entertain myself, uh, decisively sent a red envelope of two hundred yuan to my mother. When I just went to the toilet, I heard my mother ask my brother again: Son, how do I send red envelopes to myself...

12, it turns out that the melons in the entertainment industry recently are all out of a company, Chen Xiang is a Tianyu company, and Brilliance Chenyu debuted in a Tianyu company, including Zheng Shuang's debut in a Tianyu company. The boss of these people in the Sky Entertainment Company was Long Dani. Some netizens asked: Did Long Danni and Wang Feng have a contradiction?

13, for your behavior of buying crabs and throwing them into the pot, I always feel cruel and inhumane! At least you have to talk to them! For example, ask them, "Hey! I am a scout at Chelizi i Entertainment Co., Ltd., do you want to be popular? ”

14. A senior monk asked a Tianjin native: Which one do you choose, a fishing rod or a basket of fish? The Tianjin man replied: I want a basket of fish. The monk shook his head and smiled: "The benefactor is superficial, it is better to teach people to fish, it is better to teach people to fish, do you understand this truth?" The fish you eat is gone, the rod you can catch a lot of fish, you can use for a lifetime! The tianjin people said calmly and dismissively: After I want this basket of fish, I can sell it, and I can buy a few fishing rods and a pair of mahjong. Then rent the fishing rod to someone else, collect the rent, and then ask them to play mahjong while fishing, and you can also pump money...