One day five years ago, my sister was beaten by my brother-in-law, and my sister went back to her mother's house crying. When my dad found out, he got up and said to my mom: You comfort your daughter, I'll go out. Then my father went to my brother-in-law's house with red eyes and said to my brother-in-law: If my daughter does anything wrong in the future, you will beat me, because I did not educate her well. After saying that he was ready to kneel, he was pulled up by my brother-in-law, and he slapped himself with tears and said: Dad, I'm sorry, I was wrong. Until now, I had never heard of my brother-in-law beating my sister.
2. The son broke the teacher's glasses in class and was punished with the word "sheep" copied 10,000 times. I think it's a good thing to have my son practice calligraphy. I didn't expect my son to write that the sheep was big and small, and it was very unsightly. I told my son about this, and he wondered: The five sheep raised by Grandpa's family are all different from the same size, some are large and some are small, and the big one is bigger than the three small ones. Although my son is very reasonable, how can I have the urge to hit him?
3, after a year of work, the contract foreman finally settled all the project funds a few days ago. So he happily invited him to eat with a dozen of his migrant workers. Came to a hotel with a good grade, looking for a place to sit, the contractor saw that many people wanted a private room. The waiter looked at their dress and said contemptuously: The minimum consumption of private rooms is 2000. The foreman was a little upset, looked at the eye menu, and said: Come 2,000 yuan of ravioli, it will be coming soon! Can you take us to the private room now?
4, go to a grilled fish shop to eat grilled fish, the owner said that the fish are wild. I expressed my disbelief with contemptuous eyes. An hour later in the hospital, the boss said to me, "Do you believe it now?" Believe my grilled fish is wild fish! "I was lying on the hospital bed looking pale. hum! Wait until I take the fish hook from my stomach and see if I don't kill you!"
5, last night asked the girl to go for a walk, I confessed, the girl actually agreed.
I excitedly picked up the girl and spun her around, dropped her into the lake with a misstep, and after sending the girl home, she didn't answer my phone all night.
Just when I lamented that happiness came too suddenly and too short, my mother came home after dancing square dance,
When he entered the door, he said, You know no, just now, a confessed to the girl, and after being rejected, he threw people into the lake, which is also too cruel! ”
I......
6. When the evening self-study was over, my roommate and I saw a very beautiful schoolgirl on the playground. I was moved, and I wanted to come forward and talk. As a result, the roommate's eyes were fast and he went up first. He said, "Little sister, is it okay to ask the way?" Xue Jie was obviously a little wary: "What road?" The roommate smiled and said, "The road to your heart." Xuejie rolled her eyes and replied, "Don't ask, your appearance blocks the road." "Then, my roommate quickly dragged me away...
7. When I was in junior high school, I once secretly went to an Internet café to pack the night and was caught by my father, and I tugged at my ears and dragged my back home.
Dad: "Last night, look at the smell on your body, hurry to the shower, wash more, I will give you hot food." ”
I didn't expect my father to be so gentle in his heart, so I immediately ran to the bathroom, took off my clothes and prepared to start washing.
At this time, the father kicked open the door and took the skin and took it in: "Stripped naked, huh?" This time I have to beat you up for a long time. ”
8, smoking a cigarette recalled a few years ago a mess, when I just bought a house to pay a down payment, the funds in hand are tight, so I asked a female colleague to borrow five thousand yuan, wrote an IOU to her, and promised to the female colleague: When I have money, I will pay you back immediately. As a result, a slip of the tongue was said: When I have money, I will marry you immediately. Who knew that the female colleague laughed when she heard the poof, and was just ready to explain that she was wrong, who expected that she actually agreed, and said that the gentleman said a word, and the horse was difficult to chase.
Alas, I regret not being able to do it at the beginning, now every time I argue with her, she will take out an IOU and put it in front of me to let me pay back. Looking at the three and a half cents in my pocket, I wondered why she could find my private money everywhere, and one of her IOUs I had been looking for for years and still hadn't found it.
9, my boyfriend likes to play World of Warcraft, every time he watches him play games and ignores me, I am very angry and quarrel with him. Every time there was a fight, he would touch his head to comfort me, and I naturally obeyed, always thinking that it was a way for him to love me, so I didn't ask much. One day I didn't hold back, so I asked him: Why is it that when I am so angry, you touch my head and I am not angry? Those two goods pointed to the world of Warcraft on the screen: Look, this skill, appease the beast... Don't stop me, tonight there is me without him, there is him without me...
10, colleagues asked me to play her boyfriend, to cope with the family blind date, after dinner, her father took me alone to a room, took out a 1 million cash.
I immediately said, "Uncle, I understand what you mean, I will leave your daughter, but don't tell her, I think she will accept it better." ”
The uncle said: "No, young man, you think too much, I want to say that you are married, this 1 million is the dowry, provided that you cherish her." ”
After saying that I was immediately asked to put the money away, I looked at 1 million, thinking about his 189 pound daughter, a little confused.
![A slightly familiar shadow, the heavy friction under his feet getting closer and closer, finally stopping at the sound of "popping" the door shut. I knew it was he who had come, a man who dwelt in the devil. His name[fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)