1. At the end of last year, I bought a house, borrowed all my relatives and friends, there was a difference of 50,000, just when I was at a loss, the female colleague in the office lent me and promised to pay her back within a year. Today sent a bonus,

1.

At the end of last year, I bought a house, borrowed all my relatives and friends, and there was a difference of 50,000, just when I was at a loss, the female colleague in the office lent me and promised to pay her back within a year. Today sent a bonus, I added 5000 interest to pay her back, she insisted on no interest, Alipay turned back, said: "Interest does not charge you, you help me a favor, can you?" I was already embarrassed, and quickly agreed: "No problem, as long as I can do it, you can mention it." Female colleague: "You can absolutely do it, then you are not allowed to regret it." I only bought a station ticket for the New Year, and Chinese New Year's Eve you will drive me back to my hometown that day." "Oh my God, her request is a bit embarrassing to me, her hometown is 800 kilometers away from my home, send her back to that I can't Chinese New Year's Eve food, and then Chinese New Year's Eve that day my hometown also introduced a girl waiting for me to go back to the blind date." I thought about it: "This is a bit difficult, why don't you change it?" "She's angry now, saying I don't count what I say, what should I do?"

2. See a buddy late in the morning. So the teacher asked you what was the reason for this time? Traffic jam again? The dude shook his head and said neither. Going out in the morning was too foggy, passing by the school did not find, walked by...

3. One day he got together with his comrades-in-arms and texted me: Wife, it's too boring to be with these grandchildren! You called me back and gently turned me on hands-free. I hit the past: Husband, why haven't you come back? Just listen to the husband say: don't be bothered, remember the tube that should be managed in the future, and the less that should not be managed! Then the phone hung up... I'm a little bit... Don't bring such a pit daughter-in-law!

4. One day when the math exam paper was reviewed, there was a difficult problem, everyone could not do it, the math teacher used the method of setting the unknown number X to solve it, so he dropped the chalk and said to us: Students, do you know why I set (color)? Because I saw more than you did, the whole class was quiet for a few seconds and then burst into laughter, and the teacher also came out of the classroom with a red face...

5.

Brother took his girlfriend home for the first time today, brother's girlfriend is very beautiful and very diligent, dad is going to smoke, brother's girlfriend picked up a lighter and was busy lighting cigarettes for dad, and pouring wine for dad, of course, this is not gc.... gc is the father took out 1000 yuan, said the first meeting, give a meet and greet gift, the brother's girlfriend took the money, said thank you boss, boss, board...

6.

A little African lion is sad and depressed. Mom saw it and asked: "What, aunt deleted your Weibo?" The little lion shook his head: "Just ate a man, it may be Chinese." The lioness was furious: "You don't look at your passport when you eat people!" I told you earlier that their heavy metals exceed the standard, pesticide chemical toxins exceed the standard, as far as our body bones are concerned, can we compare with them? The lion father comforted on the side: "Don't be afraid, Chinese who can come to Africa to hunt, eat and drink are specially provided, and they must be green food." ”

7. "The confession of a long handsome man is called confession, and the confession of a long ugly man is called sexual harassment," said the girl next to him just now.

8. Tang Monk: It is not good for the four of us to spend the night here eating and living in vain, and we have to do something for the host's family. Goku: Master is right. ...... (After a while, Goku came in through the door) and said, "Master, now we have something to do, we don't have to eat and live in vain." Tang Monk: What? Goku: Their old man had just been killed by me, and he was just ready to do things.

9. In the past, when I was working, the overalls were light blue shirts.

　　One day I saw a colleague wearing a nice purple shirt. I said, this color is really beautiful, very suitable for you. This dress is not cheap at first glance.

　　The goods came back: It was the result of my overalls, washed with my red panties.

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