1. The husband's pension is more than 10,000 a month, and he has saved for three years. Yesterday, the old man took 3 passbooks to the bank and said: The password 991206, and I will get 3 million funds. cabinet

1. The husband's pension is more than 10,000 a month, and he has saved for three years. Yesterday, the old man took 3 passbooks to the bank and said: The password 991206, and I will get 3 million funds. The teller was very happy and immediately took out 3 million yuan and bought the fund. After 10 minutes, the teller said: Sir, I have bought you 3 million funds. The old man was dumbfounded on the spot: What fund? I'm asking you to withdraw your money and buy a house for my son!

2. When I was in junior high school, the classroom was still very simple, and there was no fan in it, so it was like a sauna in the summer. Every time the little monk was too hot, he would put a book under the P strand, and if he felt that the book under the P strand was hot, he would change it. Fu Er Dai saw it and asked him: "Your learning ability is really strong, you can read all the texts of this semester in one lesson, and I admire it in the next step!" ”

3, today off work with my girlfriend shopping, girlfriend to go to the public toilet convenient, I look for a girlfriend at the door. At this time, a little sister came over: Handsome man, are you waiting for someone? Me: Yes. Little Sister: You are waiting for me! Me: I don't know you! I'm waiting for my girlfriend! Little sister: You are so bad, who promised to be your girlfriend! Me: Look for it again! As a result, the little sister threw herself into my arms: Don't look for it, just you! Then my girlfriend showed up...

4, yesterday at home lol is hi it, the phone suddenly popped up WeChat verification message. I clicked on it, and it said: Brother called me, I am your sister! I directly refused, and replied: I don't like my sister, I like my sister! After a few minutes, my aunt called. She asked me: Your cousin plus you asked you math problems, why don't you agree?

5, a rich driver's hometown has something to ask for leave, who knows that during this period the company just has something to deal with him. So he had to drive from the suburbs to the company at night. The road was not familiar, so I walked in the navigation, and suddenly an old lady appeared. Too late to brake, hit! In the hospital, when Big Mama woke up, Rich: "I'm sorry Big Mom, I drove too fast!" Big Mom: "You're the top bag, it's a woman who hit me!" The rich man was confused, Big Mom: "The moment I was knocked unconscious, I listened to a woman's voice say that the traffic lights in front of me took pictures!" ”

6. After the father-in-law retired from the State Grid, he had a retirement salary of 10,000 yuan every month and lived a leisurely life. He often plays chess with the old man in the community, but he has never been able to play Go, and is often ridiculed by Uncle Wu, a neighbor of the second stage of Go, saying that Go is not something that ordinary people can play if they want to! My father-in-law was particularly depressed, and I wanted to avenge him. Privately found Uncle Wu to play Go, he said let me, I said no, open the phone "Go master", adjust to the expert difficulty. Uncle Wu next I press a step, robot next I learn a step. Uncle Wu was stupid, lost 4 games in a row, and then I fled. Later, he actually came to me to worship the teacher, saying that I was a genius, and I was so good at playing mobile phones, and I didn't think about chess moves...

7, do not go to work today, idle. So I took my little niece to the park. Suddenly seeing a couple of couples loving the show is called a can't bear to look at it directly. At that time, I couldn't help but sigh, and then the little niece asked: Aunt, when are you going to find me an uncle?" I smiled and said: Wait until you get a hundred points. Only to see the little niece stunned for a few seconds, a serious face said: Aunt, you must not joke about your life's events.

8, the mother-in-law was hit by a Bentley, did not rescue it, the owner of the car lost 3.6 million. After my father-in-law got the money, he began to frantically pursue a beautiful model. The day after the beautiful model agreed to the relationship, her father-in-law wanted to turn her into the hotel! Father-in-law: "Believe me, I will make you the second happiest person in the world!" The beautiful model's eyes widened and she said, "Why isn't it brother one?" Father-in-law: "Because of you, I am the happiest person!" Beauty Model: "I think I will soon be able to become a happy person in the world." The father-in-law asked, "Why?" The beautiful model said coldly, "Hmm, because I'm going to put on your entanglement." "After saying that, stride away!

9, when I was in school at Tsinghua, I had an exam with the penultimate brother one, I went home and gave the test paper to my father, I thought it was not wrong, my father beat me up without saying a word... I'm not willing to do it, I can't figure out why I only scored 10 points? Looking more closely, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I had mistakenly taken someone else's test paper, because I didn't recognize the pencil characters. I was very happy to find my 56-point test paper to show my dad... Then he was beaten up again.

10, the wife has gained a lot of weight after giving birth to a child, and she has always wanted to lose weight without a chance. Now affected by weight loss advertising, I bought several boxes of weight loss pills to eat. After eating for about a month, the wife took out her beloved dress and put it on. I saw it and said: Oh, thin, indeed thin! The wife jumped and jumped happily, and as a result, I said again: The waist of this skirt used to fit very well, and now it is tied to the waist!

11. I took my son to the hospital to fill his teeth, and when the doctor repeatedly stroked the tooth decay with a thin needle, he cried and teared his heart and lungs... After making up the payment, the son wiped away his tears and quietly said: "Mom, that female doctor is a little fierce, but I think she looks quite beautiful!" "After paying the fee to get the medical record book, I relayed my son's words to the doctor, and the female doctor was happy to close her mouth." At this time, my son came and said: "Auntie, just now you are really beautiful wearing a mask... How do you get rid of the mask now? "This bear child... Thankfully, the teeth have been mended!

#Funny# #Funny# #年度搞笑名场面 #