Confessing to the goddess was rejected by her, at this time just saw a lottery shop next door, decisively bought all the remaining 100 yuan on the body, did not expect good luck, won a hundred million. handful

Confessing to the goddess was rejected by her, at this time just saw a lottery shop next door, decisively bought all the remaining 100 yuan on the body, did not expect good luck, won a hundred million. I was about to cry with excitement. The next day, I quit my job as a security guard, bought two villas, three luxury cars, and paid my parents fifty million yuan in living expenses, and as a result, this matter spread in the village without knowing how, and the matchmakers all rushed to introduce me to my girlfriend, and even the village flower Xiaofang also ran to my house to say that I would not marry in this life, and I would not be able to drive away. There was no way but to marry her home, Emma, if I hadn't woken up laughing, my children would be three years old.

2. My cousin's family runs a restaurant, and there is often a beautiful woman who is thinner than her to eat.

Every time I came, it was: fat sister to a roast duck, a portion of fish and meat shreds, and so on.

So the cousin specially explained that the back hall to the beautiful women to cook dishes are more oil, more put lamb, or that kind of special greasy, fragrant.

Just yesterday I finally saw the beautiful woman who often came to dinner.

It was hot eyes, she was finally fatter than her cousin....

3. I am a programmer of a well-known IT company, with a monthly salary of 9800.

One day it was raining, and I was working overtime at the company when the power suddenly went out.

So, I took advantage of the black to take the hand of the hot female assistant.

Who expected, she said softly: "Boss, why are you like this again, you haven't left work yet~" As soon as this word came out, I felt that I was in trouble, and I could only leave the unit in advance.

My wife was a female anchor before, and I brushed a full 900,000 gifts to marry her home.

After marriage, I found out that she was simply a gold woman, and last night she said to me: You really should learn from mosquitoes.

I was very confused and asked: What to learn? The wife said quietly: Mosquitoes, from time to time to create surprises, you see, i did not pay attention to my hand and I have another bag.

6. There are two rich wives in the gym, and every day they discuss houses, luxury cars, and designer clothes in front of my girlfriends and me! My girlfriend and I, although superficially nothing, felt very uncomfortable.

Yesterday the two rich ladies brought a bunch of their stinky shoes and said they didn't want to wear them for us.

My girlfriend and I accepted it awkwardly, turned around and threw it in the trash.

It wasn't until I went to the shower with them a few days ago that it was finally our turn to snort.

The girlfriend shouted even more exaggeratedly: "You two and the two little people in my refrigerator seem to be oh!" ”

Today, when the female colleague went on a blind date and came back, I ran over to her and asked her: How is the photo, is it successful. Female colleague said: Today the family arranged two blind dates for me, both of which I am quite satisfied with, and now I have not considered which one to choose? The female colleague asked me again: Brother, do you say that I am good to choose the rich one or the more handsome one? I thought about it and said: This is a bit difficult to choose, if you choose a coach, but there is no money, it is not useful. If you choose a rich man, a man, once you have money, it is easy to become bad. So I think you should choose a perfect man like me, just ready to continue, female colleagues can't listen. The next day, the female colleague came to me crying and said: Brother, those two did not look at me, you have to pay a handsome and rich to me. Emma, where do I go to find this, or shall I give her myself cheaply?

2. The brother-in-law was hit by a Bentley Elegant, one leg was amputated, and the owner of the Bentley lost more than two million.

Many relatives in the family know that the brother-in-law has money and go to the hospital with gifts to see him, the brother-in-law is sad to cry, and the family is also sad! At this time, my five-year-old son suddenly spoke: Uncle, you are a gecko with a broken tail to escape, you should be glad that you are alive, it is your broken leg that saved your life! The brother-in-law suddenly froze, and then laughed again: I have lived half a lifetime, and I don't know much more than a child.

Thank you, you made me suddenly enlightened.

3. The boss called me to the office, and my colleagues said that it was the boss who made me the manager and called me to talk.

I was secretly proud of myself, and then I went.

Suddenly the boss suddenly let out a fart.

I saw the opportunity to perform, and in order not to embarrass the boss, I took the initiative to stand up: "Sorry boss, I let it go."

I eat too many turnips in the morning. The boss smiled slightly: "You don't have to go to work tomorrow, you said you have nothing to do, this office is just the two of us." ”

With the daughter-in-law is a colleague, that year on the eve of Valentine's Day, a person lying in bed at night, thinking that there is no girlfriend, all night long, sleepless, so decided to send a 20 yuan red envelope in the colleague group and attached: whoever receives the red envelope will take me home. As a result, a female colleague did not read the message and directly took the red envelope, and after discovering it, she wanted to return it to me. Naturally, I wouldn't agree. The next day, I began to stalk her, asking her to keep her promises, and finally I couldn't help but agree to associate with me. Last night, I asked her: If you reject me a few more times, I won't bother you anymore, why did you still agree. The daughter-in-law smiled and said: I was thinking at the time, this society has a thick skin of people easy to get rich, you use twenty yuan to want to bubble a girl, how thick the skin must be. I just can't understand, you have such a thick skin, why haven't you seen you get rich? I...

She is a classmate of the same school with her daughter-in-law and her girlfriend, but her girlfriend is almost thirty years old and still single, and often runs to my house to visit the door when there is nothing to do, and after a long time, she is accustomed to it. Today she came to my house again to rub rice, and after the meal, her girlfriend proposed to play poker, and all three of us raised our hands in agreement. As a result, at the end of the round, I was so lucky that I won all the money I had with me. At this time, the daughter-in-law went to the bathroom, and her girlfriend shook my arm and said: Brother, you have won all my money, or you will invite me to dinner alone tomorrow, I must not have agreed, she said angrily: Hum, stingy, wait for you to look good. At this time, the daughter-in-law came out and saw the angry face of her girlfriend and asked her: Is it not happy to lose money? Her girlfriend replied: No, and then pointed to me and said: He said that he was going to ask me to dinner alone when you went to the bathroom. At this time, the cannibalistic gaze came from the eyes of my daughter-in-law, and I felt that this matter was not as simple as I wanted