1. Xiao Qiang slept until midnight, found his daughter-in-law holding his hand and pressed it around, at first he thought what to do, but later found that he was unlocking the phone, he opened a gap in the corner of his eye, and smiled darkly

1. Xiao Qiang slept until midnight, found his daughter-in-law holding his hand and pressed it around, at first he thought what to do, but later found that he was unlocking the mobile phone, he opened a gap in the corner of his eye, secretly sneered, not afraid of the daughter-in-law to unlock, afraid that she would not understand it. After the daughter-in-law opened Xiao Qiang's mobile phone, it popped up to do tomorrow's things, tomorrow, I want to love my wife well. I want to make good money, give my wife flowers... Xiao Qiang's daughter-in-law looked at it and cried, silently put down her mobile phone, covered the quilt for Xiao Qiang, and made him food in the middle of the night. Xiao Qiang felt a little guilty, so he got up to help, and as a result, her daughter-in-law was immediately angry: "You said that a big man went around the stove, went back to sleep, and let the woman do the cooking!" Roll..." Xiao Qiang heard the words, and went back to sleep. In the morning, the kitchen was clean, Xiao Qiang asked his daughter-in-law about the meal, and his daughter-in-law said that after cooking to see your sleeping incense, she couldn't bear to eat it all.

2. My boyfriend is a science and engineering man, usually more wooden! He self-righteously thinks I'm usually very short of oxygen, so he gives me air every holiday! Can such a boyfriend still want it?

3. Some people, who have been in my WeChat for such a long time, usually do not chat with me, do not give me likes, do not evaluate me, are you looking for opportunities to conspire against me? You squeak too!

4. Although I am usually a big grinning person, I think my eyes are not dye tanks, and I can't fit your various faces! Hurry up and put away your micro-expressions!

5. After lunch, I was chatting with my colleague, who said, "I'm really afraid of getting old." Me: "When you are really old, you will not be afraid of getting old." Colleague: "Because it has become calmer by then?" Me: "No, because then you will become afraid of death!" Colleague: "Can you still talk well?" ”

6. Going out to watch a movie tonight, sitting in front of a couple, the girl took out her mobile phone to take a picture: Strange, why is it so blurry? Her boyfriend: Are you stupid? Wouldn't it be okay for you to put 3D glasses on your phone? I was speechless in the back!

7. Going to a colleague's wedding on the weekend, I asked a buddy: Marriage requires the blessing of relatives and friends, but why is there no one to bless single? Dude: Because single people will always be happy, get married for a few days! Me: Haha... What you say makes a lot of sense!

8. Today I asked a college classmate: If you were given a chance to live again, would you say yes? Student: Forget it! When I think about admissions, college entrance examinations, high numbers, essays and job fairs, I don't want to suffer again!

9. The pace of life is fast, now some young girls how they spend the weekend: do not wash their faces, do not go out, do not wash their hair, do not get out of bed, do not wear makeup, can stick to a meal, and then go to the toilet, has been considered a tourist! It is even more impossible to tell them to go out of the way!

10. Winter has come, but we southerners do not have to envy the heating in the north, because we are at home, we have girlfriends (wives) angry! You can also make your anger angry!

11. Usually you look at me and I don't exercise much, but I am exercising all the time, my stomach and intestines are always peristalsis, my blood is flowing 24 hours a day, my brain is active day and night, and my mind is wandering without paying attention! It's just that my movement is not the same as yours! #Funny Humor Anecdotes # #幽默搞笑段子 #