1. In the middle of the night, the father helped his son cover the quilt and was ready to turn off the lights, but the son suddenly trembled and said: Dad, there is someone under my bed, the father does not believe, lie down to see, there is really a boy exactly like the son under the bed, the boy is dead tugging on the sleeve of the father, and said in a trembling voice: "Daddy, there is someone in my bed, I am so afraid of ,????? In the end, the father beat the twin sons fiercely!
2. My wife worked late into the night, and I drove the new car to pick her up and take her home. On the way, I suddenly asked my wife: "Wife, did I run a red light when I was at the intersection just now?" Wife: "It's okay, don't shoot at that intersection, drive your car quickly, don't talk nonsense." Me: "Not good, daughter-in-law, just patronized to talk to you, the intersection pressed double yellow line, this intersection is photographed!" Wife: "What do you bother to say, riding a broken bicycle who will take your picture, freeze me to death, you ride fast!" ”
3. The hotel checked out, the waiter came to check the room, found that there were three holes in the curtains, so he asked for a hole to pay 50 yuan. The dude asked, "Are you sure a hole is $50?" The waiter nodded. Only to see these two goods pick up cigarette butts to burn the three small holes in the curtains into a big hole, and then gave the waiter 50 pieces, saying: "If you can save 100, save 100." ”?
4. I have a crush on a goddess for a long time, and I follow her home every night. Finally, today's opportunity came, and on the way, she met two drunken young people flirting with her. I roared angrily and rushed up and beat both of them away. The goddess said, "Thank you, this time I owe you a personal favor, what can you ask for?" I smiled and said, "Be my girlfriend!" The goddess shook her head and said, "Why not do this?" Just when I owe you two affections. ”
5. The wife especially likes to dress up and is also a person who pursues taste. I especially like to be different and creative. On this day, I bought her a new dress on the Internet, which was particularly satisfied, but I gave a bad review with joy. I asked my wife: Aren't you very satisfied with this dress, how to give a bad review? The wife said calmly: Yes, it is to give a bad review. This prevents others from buying it and won't bump into the shirt...?
6. Eating roast duck in Quanjude, I met the primary school math teacher of that year. I was confused and couldn't remember what the teacher's name was. But out of the gift bag, I can't pretend not to see it, and I have a clever move, wave my hand and walk over: Oh, isn't this a math teacher? The teacher looked at me, smiled, and said, "Well, isn't that the student?"
7. The husband hears that his wife is having an affair and plots revenge. One night, my wife slept soundly and rubbed concentrated rat poison on her chest. The next night, the wife returned late, and when the husband asked why, the wife said sadly and indignantly, "Our leader has been poisoned and killed!" Madame asked, "Do you know who did it?" The wife said: "The murderer is quite cunning, and even the police can't find out the poison through what channel, but there are already clues, and they are investigating Sanlu and Shengyuan milk powder." The husband asked, "Why?" The wife said, "When the leader breathed, he said, 'Oh my God! Is there still safe milk in the world?
8. On the weekend, I was rubbing rice at my sister's house, I took my little nephew to the supermarket to buy soy sauce, and I met the goddess on the way. I asked my nephew to call auntie, and my nephew said, "Auntie, you are so beautiful!" The goddess was very happy to hear this, and she pinched her nephew's little face with her hand: "The child's mouth is so sweet." Nephew: "Auntie, you didn't kiss my mouth, how do you know if it's sweet or not?" Then the goddess actually kissed him!" I was stunned... That one, in fact, my mouth is more...
#Funny Moment#Funny Paragraph# #年度搞笑名场面 #
A wave of wonderful GIFs to !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
