1. The local tycoon met a beautiful flight attendant on a business trip, chased for more than a year, and finally got together, and it didn't take long for the flight attendant to get pregnant, and the two people were married, and when they were born, the flight attendant was tall and the child was long

1. The local tycoon met a beautiful flight attendant on a business trip, chased for more than a year, finally together, it didn't take long for the flight attendant to get pregnant, the two people were married, when they were born, the flight attendant was tall, the child grew up to be relatively large, and it took a long time to go down, and finally chose to have a caesarean section, the flight attendant almost lost half a life, and the child was nine pounds and one or two. After the birth of the child, the mother-in-law praised the child as beautiful, like a flight attendant, and had big legs, saying that she ate hot pot. Hearing this, my heart was suddenly cold, and I said with tears: Have you forgotten that I have been going to Chengdu for more than a month, and I am no longer in Shanghai

2. After the old man retired from the State Grid, he took a pension of 600,000 yuan. So he went to 4s to pick up a BMW 7 Series and gave the Volkswagen Maiteng that had been driving for two years to his wife. Last night at the college reunion, I drank too much, so I asked my wife to pick me up. Along the way she kept driving the high beam and was scolded half to death by me! When my wife pressed the staggered high beam N times, I nagged. As a result, my wife suddenly put the car on the side of the road and stopped at me: You just buy me a flashlight, I don't use the headlights!

3. When applying for a divorce certificate, the staff asked a couple: Are you divorcing voluntarily? The woman said: Yes. The man said: No. The staff asked the man: Then why did you come back? The man said: I was forced by others to pull me. The woman said: Don't talk nonsense. The man was silent. Praise for such a woman, when can we be so cattle? Even divorce is so domineering!

4. A rich man goes to the wedding of his adopted daughter. The local tycoon stood motionless and quietly, watching his adopted daughter get into the wedding car, and the car slowly walked away The local tycoon was still watching there... After a long time, the son walked to the local tycoon and smiled and said, "Daddy, it hurts that the little cotton jacket has been taken away by the wolf!" The local tycoon turned his head and glanced at his son: "I am happy that the little cotton jacket was taken away by the wolf, but my own pig can't even bring back a cabbage, which hurts my heart!" The son said, "Don't worry, Dad, I'll do it as soon as possible."

5. I was working as a supervisor at a construction site, and one day when I was at work, I accidentally got a nail in my arm, which was quite deep. So I rushed to the hospital to deal with it, and called the company to ask for leave. Half an hour later, all the colleagues in the whole office came to visit me, and I was so flattered that I couldn't be moved. As a result, they stayed for only 1 minute, and after a few words, they happily went to the Internet café.

6. Overtime at night to change the contract, get up in the morning and get cold and have a little headache. When I was taking medicine, I was seen by my nephew, who came over and hugged me and asked: Aunt, are you taking medicine, are you sick? Don't be afraid. I was instantly moved: Well, but my aunt got better immediately after taking the medicine. The nephew jumped up happily: Really? Since my aunt is well, take me out to buy good food now.

7. The brother-in-law went to see the father-in-law and the mother-in-law, and when they ate, the brother-in-law pressed them all in the living room to drink tea and watch TV, and went to the kitchen to take the initiative to cook. When the rice was ready, the mother-in-law took a bite and then took the chopsticks in her mouth. Tearful eyes said: This reminds me of the taste of the old woman cooking....... The brother-in-law was excited: you like it! The mother-in-law said: Alas, when I was a child, I was poor! 10 people a dish, salty eat a bite on a nest head.?

8. In the year of my senior year, the school flower known as the "Iceberg Beauty" confessed to me. But I have a girlfriend, and she's pregnant, so I can only bear to refuse. Now that I have graduated for many years, the school flower suddenly sent me a V letter, saying that she was coming to me and asked me to go to a bar for a gathering. In order not to cause trouble, I told my wife about this matter. The wife did not object, casually asked the address of the bar, and then went shopping with a few of her girlfriends. I dressed up and got to the date early. The school flower called me and said it would be there in a minute, and my heart was racing and I looked around. Suddenly, my expression froze, and I was in a position directly in front of me, and my wife and several of her girlfriends were drinking happily...

9. Today at noon to go to the company downstairs to eat, saw a woman unscrew the drink and looked at the bottle cap and said: What is the husband's next bottle? Her husband said she didn't know, so the woman threw the bottle cap to the ground, and then the two of them got up and left after eating the noodles, they just went out, I squatted down and picked up the bottle cap, a look is thank you for tasting... Only to see the couple turn their faces, the woman said: Hurry up a hundred dollars to bring, I will tell you that someone will definitely pick it up!

10. Husband is allergic to alcohol, whether white or beer, one cup is red, two cups come to the emergency room. Going out to dinner with his colleagues on weekends and discussing what to drink before dinner, everyone knew he couldn't drink it, so they didn't ask him for advice. As a result, my husband is unwilling, I can't drink my daughter-in-law can drink, I just want to ask if there is such a pit daughter-in-law?

11. My cousin went to visit his colleague's house today and saw that his colleague was cutting his wife's fingernails, and my cousin smiled and said, "Yo, so loving!" The colleague smiled: "Yes, I have to cut it for her once in two or three days." The cousin said, "Come, cut it for me once." The colleague said: "The beauty of thinking!" My cousin asked him, "Why don't you cut it for me?" The colleague said, "You won't scratch my face with your hands!" #Funny Moment#Funny Paragraph##搞笑幽默趣闻 #