Couples need at least three elements to maintain the long-term stability of their love relationship:
One is that both parties make each other a family through the form of marriage, and find a sense of belonging in this love relationship; the second is that the couple must have a common child, and the arrival of the child can make the feelings between the husband and wife more stable; the third is that the husband and wife must have a love foundation, because they love each other, the feelings between them will not be easily defeated by setbacks and trivialities in life.
In real life, many people do not understand this truth, they simply believe that as long as two people get along well together, the love between them can always remain fresh.
As everyone knows, love will disappear, even a very loving couple, when the love between the two of them is eroded by the years, they will inevitably become disgusted with each other, at this time, if the love between them lacks the factor of mutual involvement, the love relationship between the two of them may have the risk of disintegration at any time.
If a person only knows how to pay for love, but has never thought about how to stabilize the love relationship between two people from the perspective of a lover, his final end is likely to be nothing.
40-year-old Shi Cheng (pseudonym) is a Shandong uncle, he and his girlfriend Wang Mei (pseudonym) fell in love for 7 years, in this 7 years, he not only helped his girlfriend raise children, but also helped his girlfriend pay off the mortgage of 1900 yuan every month, but just when he was looking forward to being able to accompany his girlfriend to old age, he was driven out of the house by Wang Mei.
Shi Cheng said with a depressed look: She (Wang Mei) is too cruel to me, I am too sad.
Why did Wang Mei throw Shi Cheng out of the house? It all started with the acquaintance of the two of them.
7 years ago, Shi Cheng, who is 33 years old but not yet married, is eager to find the other half of love through the Internet, one day, he met a woman named "Accompany Me for a Lifetime" on a social networking app, he saw the other party's avatar qingxiu, and he held the mentality of trying it out and added it as a friend.
After understanding, Shi Cheng learned that the real name of "AccompanyIng My Life" is called Wang Mei, the two talked and speculated in the network, and soon fell in love, and a few months later, the two went from the Internet to reality, quickly established a romantic relationship, and lived together.
Wang Mei once had a failed marriage, and after separating from her ex-husband, she lived alone with her daughter, who was only one or two years old, and her financial situation was very tight.
But Shi Cheng, who fell in love for the first time, did not mind that Wang Mei had children, he regarded Wang Mei's children as his own, Wang Mei needed to take the children at home, could not go out to work, Shi Cheng took on the responsibility of making money to support the family, whenever he worked hard for a month to receive wages, he would transfer all his income to Wang Mei at the first time, he even needed to ask Wang Mei for money to buy a pack of cigarettes.
Although Shi Cheng worked hard, his heart was happy, and he finally had a home of his own.
However, Shi Cheng's happy life did not last long, Shi Cheng was living with Wang Mei in the 4th year, Wang Mei suddenly indulged in chatting with strange people of the opposite sex on the Internet, and often found various reasons to quarrel with Shi Cheng, and the two of them eventually broke up.
Thinking that his painstakingly managed feelings for 4 years had no results, Shi Cheng was very painful, and after a few months, he learned that Wang Mei was married to someone else, and he could only choose to put it down, thinking that Wang Mei might just be a passer-by in his life, and the lives of the two would never have any intersection again.
What Shi Cheng did not expect was that just when he was about to let go of this relationship, one day Wang Mei suddenly found him and said to him: If I divorce now, will you still want me?
Hearing Wang Mei's words, Shi Cheng had a momentary trance in his mind, and he only replied lightly, Aren't you still married and divorced? Wait until you're gone.
Shi Cheng's words made Wang Mei have the confidence to divorce, and within a few days, she directly divorced, and even if she returned to Shi Cheng's side.
The lost and regained love made Shi Cheng cherish it even more, he was as good to his girlfriend as before, or gave all his salary to his girlfriend, during which he also made a request to Wang Mei to get a license to marry, but Wang Mei refused for various reasons.
Although Shi Cheng had doubts in his heart, he thought about it for a moment, two people love each other together, why should they care about that paper? So the love relationship between the two continued.
Time has passed for another 3 years, Wang Mei likes to chat with the opposite sex through the Internet and the problem has been committed again, she will spend a lot of time on social platforms every day, perhaps she knows more excellent opposite sex, Wang Mei gradually shows a bored attitude towards Shi Cheng, she even directly said to Shi Cheng, you go, don't delay me to find a new boyfriend.
Shi Cheng thought that there would be no one in the world who loved Wang Mei more than himself, and he felt that Wang Mei's words were just a momentary angry words, so he turned a blind eye and carefully maintained this relationship, hoping that his girlfriend could have a day when he was touched by him.
But once when Shi Cheng came home from work, he found that Wang Mei had packed all their luggage and thrown them outside the door and drove him out of the house.
The girlfriend's resolute approach, so that Shi Cheng is both sad and angry, he said bluntly, I have 7 years, for her (Wang Mei) to eat, for her to drink, every month to help her 1900 yuan mortgage, I do not even have my own children, but helped her raise a child, and now she drove me out, I am too sad.
Shi Cheng did not want all his efforts to disappear, he said bluntly, I don't count other money, but I help Wang Mei repay the mortgage money, she wants to pay me back.
With that, Shi Cheng took out the transfer record of his mobile phone, which did show that every once in a while, he would transfer a lot of money to a person named "Accompany Me all my life".
Shi Cheng took the mediator to Wang Mei's home, but Wang Mei was not at home, so the mediator dialed Wang Mei's phone.
On the phone, Wang Mei denied that Shi Cheng had helped her pay off the mortgage, but when Shi Cheng asked her where her monthly salary had gone, Wang Mei said bluntly, "You live with me, don't you spend money?" You want money, who do I want?
Wang Mei believes that the money and energy shi cheng has paid in this relationship are all "you love me", and she does not feel that she needs to repay Shi Cheng's money.
Seeing Wang Mei's resolute attitude, Shi Cheng considered defending his rights and interests through litigation, and at this point, the emotional entanglement between the two of them temporarily came to an end.
Sentiment Analysis:
Regarding love, the writer Sukhomlinsky once said this:
Mutual love, it is a great personal happiness. It manifests itself not only in the fact that a person derives pleasure from life, but first and foremost in the desire to give joy to a loved one.
The enlightenment brought to us by this sentence is that in a stable love relationship, the couple needs to love and protect each other, and the feelings of the two of them need to run in both directions.
In the love story between Shi Cheng and Wang Mei, Shi Cheng only knows how to pay for his lover, but he has never thought about what he has gained in this relationship, perhaps because the balance in this love relationship is unbalanced, so that Wang Mei does not know how to cherish Shi Cheng's efforts.
Love is based on mutual understanding between couples, and when a couple comes together, they should understand that the other person is with themselves, whether it is out of love or something else.
If the two lovers come together out of love, they should join hands in the palace of marriage, give each other a name for love, and they should also have a common child, so that the love relationship between the two parties becomes more stable.
And in love, people who are hypocritical and hypocritical, often only know how to ask for lovers, but are not willing to pay for their lovers, if they want to manage the love relationship for a long time, couples should be able to do each other's love on the basis of love, and create a happy love life with lovers.
(Picture from the Internet, invasion and deletion)