If there is a day when the dragon gets water, it will definitely let the water of the Yangtze River flow backwards! If a tiger returns to the mountain one day, it will stain half the sky with blood!
I
My story is shared I am from a rural family, a gambler father and son story. Since I can remember, I have particularly hated my father, I don't feel my father's love, I like to gamble and gamble, and I borrow usurious loans.
I was an 88-year-old, and now that I've done it all, I've come to work with my parents in 2005. Play a year a month salary all to the parents, I spent 1500 to buy a mobile phone, buy some clothes, I am a very obedient child, feel very short of money to spend, talk about a relationship with my mother to talk about money to fall in love to one or two hundred, my mother is a provincial food and inspection of people, the mouth is a little nagging, my father often gambles with the factory. Let me see him upset every day, every day after eating a bowl push, it is really no gamble.
I grew up to be 500 yuan with my father, since 2006 I did not earn money to my parents, then I went to the Internet to play games, watch others play slot machines, I also played for the first time, won more than thirty pieces of happy excitement. In the later period, you can think of losing two or three thousand, you play less, half a year later suddenly see your game curiosity into it, look at the monkey panda, ask people how to play, the result of losing 500 an hour, and after two or three months to change a job, met a confidant to play the game machine, fishing a variety of games do not mistake the right business, the early stage of intermittently won tens of thousands, the heart played bigger and bigger, the result found that the death is very miserable, the more you lose the more you play, the result is that you lost penniless, the situation is more and more seriously affect the mentality.
After two months of calm, quit, stable to 2010, talked about a girlfriend and talked about marriage for four years, foreign daughter-in-law, feel fine, marriage is annoying. After marriage, I lived in a chicken feather and bought a house with a down payment. My mom gave me twenty thousand, and my dad stole ten thousand down payments and lost it, angry at me. How can I have such a father... Since buying a house at that time, it is really the beginning of a bottomless abyss... Seeing that the city game hall was out of control, I went in and brought a thousand pieces to play the new model of the dragon machine, and it happened that the people who played were not accurate, so I played the last six doors, played for a little half a day and won ten thousand, and found that the money came from the block, and the next day won four or five thousand.
After winning more than 30,000 yuan for three or four consecutive days, I only earned more than 40,000 a year, and at that time I felt that I had found a way to get rich. After a loss of mentality to play all bad, open two machines three machines, learn to install B, a squeeze of two thousand pieces: lose more on fire, a day and a night without sleep, win all lost, more than ten thousand also lost, and then borrowed credit cards everywhere repeatedly lost eleven thousand, I crazy, like a dead man slept for half a month. After that control a thousand or two thousand wins and losses every month until the nightmare of the tour 2017 begins.
The sister got married, the brother-in-law had a little money, borrowed eighty thousand to do business, and as a result, he didn't know the strength that day, hearsay that the mobile phone played online gambling, charged two hundred and tried to lose. Later, he directly charged two thousand and won more than ten thousand. Cash out to the account happy, steady and steady to earn, said that the mentality should be put well, five days in a row, won more than forty thousand, the sixth day directly died all hanging, lost eighty thousand, feel that life has reached the end of the station. The next day to find an excuse to go out to see the store, to go to the classmates to send a small loan of ten thousand, and the old watch that borrowed twenty thousand, has not played for ten hours, charged ten thousand lost, and charged twenty thousand, the heavens tired to hit sixteen thousand cash, fourteen thousand left twenty thousand, has been waiting for the cash to the account to sleep at ease.
The next day really should not be playing, direct killing in place, dark, mother angry half dead, daughter-in-law also parted ways, separated without divorce, there are two children, at home every day want to die. Two hundred thousand in debt, and a mortgage. After two months of Shen Lun, 2017.8.2 to go to the furniture factory in the early 3500-4000 to 2018, March, the start of the salary of 6000 to the second half of the year, seven or eight thousand January, the salary basically gave the mother 3500, now think about giving too little, at the end of the year the holiday is sick again, sent 188, the result won thirteen thousand and fascinated, lost thirty-eight thousand.
Lost years, lost life, lost family. Today, I really long for physical and mental freedom, not trapped by money, but trapped by desire. Today, I am more conscious than unconscious, because when I am awake, my brain can resist, and when I am asleep, the pieces of my brain have been circling in my head, and life has made me a chicken feather. I have long lost confidence in myself, not because I have given up on myself, because I have tried many times, countless times to wake myself up, no matter what I do feel bored; I have become stupid, and I can no longer distinguish between right and wrong;
Writing this, this is really not the life I want, I really aspire to be like a normal person, carefree. No matter how hard you try, you can't get over it. In this way, I will lose the embrace of society, and I will lose the meaning of truly living. The three views are "destroyed, the personality is distorted, the "knowledge" learned in the past, the "social experience" and "moral ethics" accumulated... It has completely failed in the "encounter" of reality. If there is a day when the dragon gets water, it will definitely let the water of the Yangtze River flow backwards! If a tiger returns to the mountain one day, it will stain half the sky with blood!
Come on, a few autumns in life are not drunk, life must have a pattern. I hope this will bring more help to those netizens, remember that only by quitting can there be hope. Will make the child slowly better. Although it is difficult for you to cocoon yourself, it is no wonder that others can cheer up and hope that the heart will be better tomorrow