Zhang Xiaoxian once said:
"Love is always more beautiful than reality, and it is like meeting and saying goodbye. We thought that love was very deep, very deep, and the next few years would let you know that it was only very shallow, very shallow. ”
Heart-wrenching, right? Heart-wrenching indeed! Realistic, right? It's realistic!
When you think that as long as you love each other, you can live forever, as long as you are together, you can never leave.
But eventually you will find that many times, everything is just your own naïve wishful thinking.
Encounters are always accompanied by parting.
Rather than blindly obsessing over a wrong relationship, in fact, turning around is the greatest tenderness to yourself.
In this life, people should never blindly wrong themselves.
In the interaction between two people, if the other party frequently has the following three behaviors, then he is already doomed to not accompany you to the end.
What you have to do is end in time and start over.
Extremely controlling
There is a sentence in Rodin's Lover:
"I just can't understand whether it's harder to love or harder to endure."
The essence of love is to tolerate, understand, and respect, not to control, manipulate, and possess.
Loving others too full will hurt, and being loved too much by others is also a disaster.
Once saw such a story:
There is such a couple, in which the man is a very controlling person.
How much of a control is he?
After two people are together, men don't allow women to have their own circles, and women are not allowed to have friends of the opposite sex.
Even the woman had to ask for his consent to wear whatever clothes she went out, and to report to him everywhere in a day.
At first, women felt that the other party just loved themselves too much, so even if they were not very comfortable, they repeatedly tolerated it.
However, later, at a colleague party, the woman drank some wine, and because a male colleague sent her home to be seen by her boyfriend, the man scolded the woman for a while, and even moved.
In the end, the woman was completely intolerable, and the relationship between the two people came to an end.
Baby Anne says in Rose Island:
"The best love is when two people are together, don't bind, don't entangle, don't occupy."
A good relationship is never about tying each other around, but about "I love you, but you're free."
If, in a relationship, a man is too controlling of you and doesn't even leave you any space.
Then such "love" will one day make you physically and mentally exhausted, and it is only a matter of time before you are separated.
Feelings are not single-minded
Qian Zhongshu said to Yang Dai:
"Before I met you, I never thought about getting married, and after meeting you, I never thought about getting married."
Love is never something that can be shared.
Men who really know how to cherish you, after being with you, will refuse to be ambiguous with the other opposite sex, thus giving you a full sense of security.
On the contrary, if a man is still eager to move the world, always twilight, left and right, then such a man will only bring you anxiety and sadness.
In the TV series "Love Me Don't Think Too Much", Bu Guoqiang and Shen Wenwen are a couple.
At first, Shen Wenwen could be said to be obsessed with Bu Guoqiang, taking care of Bu Guoqiang wholeheartedly, and thinking that Bu Guoqiang could marry her.
However, Bu Guoqiang has always been lukewarm to Shen Wenwen, and he is not only full of enthusiasm for the freshness of the outside world, but even carries Shen Wenwen behind his back to participate in the blind date program.
Even after being discovered by Shen Wenwen, he still did not know how to restrain himself, and even righteously said that he wanted to test whether the feelings of the two people could withstand the test.
Because Bu Guoqiang repeatedly disappointed shen Wenwen and was sad, shen Wenwen finally proposed to break up.
I really like this sentence:
"I did choose you seriously, but if you delay in giving me a result, I will not wait for you, because I know that you cannot withstand the temptation, too easy to lose and too easy to give up." 」
The man who truly loves you will automatically ignore all temptations and just put all his eyes, all his love, all on you.
But if a man says he loves you, but he never refuses, then such love cannot be tested.
What you have to do is recognize it early, stay away early, and avoid being hurt more deeply.
Spending money is too stingy
In the feelings, maybe talking about money, is really quite vulgar.
There will also be people who feel that money is a blasphemy against pure feelings.
But we should know that money cannot be ignored in the world.
You now think that your love is greater than money, but so many people in society are not exempt from the vulgarity, you may not be able to be exempt from the vulgar.
Blindly trying only to be sincere, in the end it will often only collapse into an army.
Friend Xiaoxin, with his ex for four years, in four years, he spent more than four figures on Xiaoxin's money.
Every time you eat AA, watch a movie AA, even if it is a gift on an anniversary, you will pick the cheapest one, and even sometimes you will just send a message of blessing, not even a red envelope.
At first, Xiao Xin felt that as long as two people were together, as long as they had love, it was not very important to have money or money.
But it wasn't until the two broke up that Xiaoxin saw a picture of him holding a large bouquet of roses and a current birthday picture shared in his circle of friends.
She just felt really funny.
It turned out that he did not know how to give, nor was he stingy in his bones, but just stingy with her.
Money, perhaps really something outside the body, is not the whole of love, but it can measure the depth of the feelings between each other.
As the saying goes:
"Talking about money hurts feelings, but not talking about money has no feelings."
If a man says that he loves you more than anything, but he will be more expensive than anything, then he will not be able to give you a sense of security, let alone give you a solid future.
Lu Qi said in "Love Needs Stop Loss":
"In this world, you get what you want. If you get something you don't want, you have to throw it away in time, otherwise you will get more and more wrong. ”
Two people in love, together, must be happier than one person.
If in this relationship, the man can not make you happy, only will make you entangled, heartbroken, painful, then stop the loss in time, swing the knife to cut the love thread is the right solution.
At all times, you have to understand that you are precious and deserve better people.
So, stay away from the one who doesn't deserve it, and hug the one who makes you happy.
The difficulty of life, when not to live up to the time, do not bear their own.
END
Author: Away from the rain slightly cool, a rational, emotional, like to use words to express personal views, bring you spiritual healing, emotional solution, life perception of the post-90s writer.