We continue with the previous article today to explore what other behaviors parents have that make children inferior, sensitive, and insecure.
1. Satirize and ridicule the shortcomings of children
Parents sarcastically ridicule their children's shortcomings, sometimes out of the idea of "hating iron is not steel", and want their children to pay more attention to correction. The starting point is good, but the way is wrong, the child's self-esteem is in the formation stage, if the parents blindly count the blows, it will only make the child feel inferior, and at the same time will think that the parents do not love themselves and lack of security.
Parents should carry out more reward and punishment education, carefully discover the advantages of children, and give full affirmation and enthusiastic encouragement to the child's progress, even if the child does something wrong, parents can also find a shining point from it and encourage the child to correct the shortcomings. Parents should also teach their children to learn self-appreciation and pay attention to their own progress instead of blindly comparing themselves with others.
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2. Hit your child when he is proud
Children are often prone to complacentity when they are successful, parents do not want to make their children too proud and arrogant, so they hit him when the child is proud, in the long run, the child's enthusiasm is suddenly cold, and they are no longer willing to strive for success on the road to growth.
When children make progress, the most important thing they want is to share this joy with their parents and get the affirmative eyes of their parents. Parents should not skimp on your heartfelt praise and encouragement, let the child fully experience the joy of success, and motivate him to continue to move forward. Of course, if the child's performance is blindly arrogant, parents can sincerely persuade the child to "make people backward with pride", rather than pouring cold water on him.
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3. Ignore the child's inner feelings
Children's hearts are sensitive and fragile, and they can easily take some casual words from their parents in their hearts. Children are young, some of their psychological feelings do not know how to use language to express, so when they encounter some setbacks or want to express some demands, they often use the direct way of crying to attract the attention and love of parents. However, some parents often have difficulty understanding their children's hearts and are only bored with their children's crying.
If your child is still just using crying to express appeals, parents can guide children to learn to express in daily life, such as the baby pointing to the doll in the window crying, the mother can help the baby: "The baby wants this doll, the mother does not let the baby buy so the baby is not happy", the child learned the causal relationship of this emotion, and the next time he will gradually use the "say" way to let the parents understand his needs. In daily life, parents should also take the initiative to communicate with their children, understand the child's heart and the way he expresses his feelings, and pay attention to the child's growth.
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4. Don't trust children
No matter what happens, parents should not sentence their children to "death penalty" without asking for reasons, and give their children the opportunity to express their explanations! Parents must first stand on the position of believing in their children, and then consciously guide their children to cultivate the quality of honesty. If a parent is initially in opposition to his or her child and doubts what his child is saying, he will not only feel frustrated, but may also lead to more lying behavior in the child.
So parents may wish to put aside your doubts first, stand in the child's point of view to understand things, if you can perceive that the child is dishonest and hidden, you can say it gently, and then educate him. Believe but not convinced, parents should learn to observe, if found that the child's words and deeds are inconsistent, first try to understand the reasons behind the child, and then correct the child's wrong behavior in time.
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Through today's article sharing, parents combined with the previous article, I believe that you will find the most suitable way and method in the process of educating children.
If you have good education methods and parenting stories, welcome to share them with Teacher Cheng!