When we were young, it was always because of the discipline of our parents that we felt that freedom was something that could only be obtained when we grew up, but when we really grew up, we found that the fate of adults was like snowflakes in the sky, they were originally white and flawless, and where they fell could not be freely chosen.
At this time, no one may continue to stare at you and say that this is not okay, that is not allowed, but we will encounter all kinds of invisible shackles, living expenses, human debt, old parents, young children, etc., which will make us unable to be free.
Especially for women, because of gender, it makes it more difficult for everyone in this society, and unfriendly to women can be seen everywhere.
But in this life, the greatest blessing of a woman is actually two words: independence.
Jiajia is also a highly educated student, and after graduation, she also thought about doing a big job, but soon after her internship, she found out that she was pregnant.
When the boyfriend heard the news, he immediately proposed to her, "The woman is brutal, in the end she will not return to the family", "There is a person who is willing to take responsibility and loves you, just be satisfied", "After marriage, you can be a full-time wife, don't be too cool".
At that time, Jiajia was always surrounded by such voices, and she listened to it a lot, and she also felt that there might be nothing wrong with getting married, so she agreed to her boyfriend's proposal, and after marriage, she chose to become a full-time wife out of the requirements of taking care of her children and husband.
Originally Jiajia thought very well, when the child is older, she will go out to work, anyway, she is not old, everything is too late.
But really wait until the children grow up a little bit, she found that the older generation and their own educational concepts are too different, plus the generation of relatives, too doting on the children, helplessly Jiajia decided to take the children herself.
In this way, the child reached the age of going to kindergarten, and Jiajia thought that she could be relieved, but her husband said that she had been out of touch for so long from society, and instead of going out with the basic salary of two or three thousand, it was better to take care of them at home.
Thinking that her husband's company is now in a period of development, busy can't get out of it, can't take care of this family at all, Jiajia compromised again.
Until the child was about to go to elementary school, the occurrence of one thing completely changed Jiajia's mind.
At that time, her parents were old, and there was no elevator in the old community where they lived, so Jiajia thought of selling their house and adding some money to buy a new house with an elevator.
After a circle to see down, Jiajia took a fancy to a set, before and after the conversion, they need to take another 300,000 on it, parents feel that this money is too big, but also take out their own 100,000 pension money subsidies, so in fact only need Jiajia and her husband to bear 200,000 can be.
In fact, this money is nothing to them, the husband's company has a net income of millions of dollars every year, but after hearing about this, the husband refused, saying that he was not willing to bear this cost.
He also said that he did not buy a house for his parents, which is unfair, and said that the market is sluggish now, and it is not so easy to make money, and in the end, he said that he was in a hurry, and directly blurted out "This money is not what you earned, why do you fight its idea."
Jiajia was stunned after hearing this, she did not expect her husband to say such a thing, not only completely denied her efforts over the years, but also reduced all the fruits of her labor worthless.
In fact, in many Chinese-style families, there are more or less similar problems, adhering to the principle of male and female protagonists, most women give up their professional ideals for marriage and children, and completely return to the family.
But in fact, what really determines the superstructure is often the economic base, which is cruel but very realistic.
If you are fortunate enough to meet a good man, they really respect you and love you, and will not use the economy to embarrass you when you are not working.
And such men, in fact, will not let you retire to the family for their selfish desires at the beginning, because they know where your true value is, and how can they be willing to let you sacrifice yourself for him?
So when a man offers to let you return to the family, it is enough to show that he does not love you so much, and a woman, who wants to have as much freedom as possible and more life choices, needs to be independent enough.
Life is always like this, we can't make people satisfied everywhere, but we also have to live enthusiastically, people live a lifetime, there are many things worth loving, don't be discouraged because of one dissatisfaction.
Women have to learn to make ourselves strong, independent from the inside out, even if anyone leaves our lives, it will not have a huge impact.
Don't let men, use the economy as an excuse and weapon that they can "do whatever they want", women should protect themselves, first of all, they must be financially independent, and then as far as possible to make spiritual independence.
At this time, you will find that life is not only a trivial matter in front of you, but also a beautiful future of wireless hard work.