Valentine's Day is coming! The loneliest state is the inability to share it with the partner around you
"Ah Chi has been waiting by my side for many years, but no matter how many times I fell, I was able to hold his hand and stand up again. But as soon as I got back on my feet, I didn't want to stay by his side any longer, I felt impatient! My heart followed Ah Wei, but for ten years he was always a little bird without legs, always erratic, always away. But I have an incomprehensible attachment to him. Recently, Ah Wei disappeared again, and Ah Zhi proposed to me, what should I do? ”
A Macau girl I've known for years said this to me. According to my observation, I think ah wei does not love her at all, and ah zhi is better. But she had always believed that there was something precious between her and Ah Wei. While waiting for Ah Wei, he never really left Ah Zhi.
In this situation, some people will think that her behavior is scummy, but in fact, directly choose either side, and the result may be terrible. If you choose to continue to attach yourself to Ah Wei, you will continue to live in unrealistic dreams. Love can not just be a simple feeling, but also have a real life. A lover who is often absent in reality is just a projection of the fantasy in the mind.
What if you choose a reliable Achi? Knowing that she does not love him, just choose a safe haven, maybe Ah Zhi provides support, but can not keep her drifting heart? Will you live together every day, but still feel lonely and secretly look into the distance?
Living in a relationship, but having to look into the distance, the distant place that the partner around you cannot share and cannot imagine, is the loneliest state of emotion.
Why not be true to your own needs and feelings? The need to support each other in real life is important, it is also important to feel fit and have enthusiasm, without any part is not complete, Ah Zhi or Ah Wei may not be the answer, feelings are not a choice between the two.
Because the mind is trapped by the erratic Ah Wei, there is no spare energy to establish another relationship that needs to be managed carefully, and can only maintain a relationship with Ah Zhi who is not troublesome and labor-saving, and the result will of course evolve into a two-choice stalemate with no way out.
Instead of thinking about how to choose one or the other, it is better to spend more effort to understand what you need and figure out the difference between a fantasy lover and a real lover. For Ah Wei, it is time to let go of unrealistic attachment, and for a good person like Ah Zhi, it is time to abandon the dependence on him who has no love. After regrouping yourself, look for a partner who shares life and emotions. Valentine's Day is coming, and maybe it's a good opportunity to think about the way out of your emotions.
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