1, I went on a blind date, the other party is actually my brother's ex-wife, my original sister-in-law. She and I stared wide-eyed, and the atmosphere was very awkward. I was about to say goodbye to her, but she sighed and said

1, I went on a blind date, the other party is actually my brother's ex-wife, my original sister-in-law. She and I stared wide-eyed, and the atmosphere was very awkward. I was about to say goodbye to her, but she sighed and said, your brother is not out, I just left him, if you and I are suitable, we can still talk. How much do you earn in a month now? I was embarrassed to say that my brother set up a company, which has become bigger and bigger in recent years, and has more than 100 million assets, I helped him, he gave me an annual salary of seven million! She was stunned for a moment, and then shouted, I went to remarry your brother, and then I ran away without a shadow!

2. When I went to the pharmacy yesterday to buy medicine, I saw a man riding a motorcycle with a 5-year-old child in the back seat. The man's riding skills were so bad that the child was shaking, and finally the motorcycle was turned upside down, and the child fell. The man didn't know it, so I stopped the car and picked up the kid and increased the throttle to catch up with him. Complaining: How did you ride a motorcycle, and you didn't know if the child fell? The man looked at the child with wide eyes and shouted, "What about your mother?"

3, the holiday is not going to use my fast moldy fishing rod to go out fishing, cultivate emotions. There was a big tree blocking the sun where I was sitting, and it was cool, and there were a lot of fish hooked. A teenage child came over and huddled next to me to fish, and the harvest was also very good. After a while, the child said to me: Brother, there are fewer people fishing in this place, can you go fishing somewhere else? I looked at him and silently packed up the fishing gear? The child is very polite: Uncle, walk slowly!

4, the brother-in-law drove Bentley to Tomson Tomson to meet business partners, suddenly Bentley leaked oil on the road, and took a taxi with the female secretary next to him. When waiting for the traffic light, the female secretary suddenly asked the local tycoon: How much is the Audi r8 in front? The brother-in-law said: About 2,000,000. The female secretary said: What about the Aston Martin next door? The brother-in-law said: Almost 4,000,000! As a result, the driver master was very surprised and said: My God, I have to collect a rent for 3 months! "

5, today's family eat dumplings, although it is not a festival, Dad still wrapped a coin Tujili. When eating dumplings, the mother bit it, something was wrong, spit it out, and looked at it, a bite-and-die hundred-dollar bill. My brother said, "Congratulations Mom won the lottery, Dad is so stingy." Looking for a few coins to fool us, I took 500 bucks from his wallet and wrapped it up. "Then my brother got a mixed doubles!"

6, the university just opened a few days ago, because there is no Internet in the dormitory, everyone goes to the Internet café, I might as well like the environment of the Internet café too much. Since I didn't have a dorm network, I asked my classmates to go to the Internet café to copy the game back. Take away the USB stick, happy to return to the night, and when I come back in the morning, I ask: What did you copy? A: Everything on the computer has come down. I was shocked: my USB stick is only 4G! So open the computer, insert the USB stick, and look at the shortcuts that fill the screen.

7, last night forgot to bring the key, called a lock, a few minutes later to open the lock came, stabbed a few times less than a minute the door opened, said to me 50. I handed him the money in a daze and did not relax for a moment. It wasn't until a small wind blew through and closed the door again that I was relieved.

8. My sister finally got married a month ago and just returned from her honeymoon in Hainan two days ago. Asked me to dinner today, and my sister looked a little upset. I'm a little confused: what's wrong? This is just after the honeymoon and the frown is sad. My sister directly began to cry: My life is miserable! After the honeymoon mother-in-law gave birth to a second child, I have to wait for the confinement before I finish enjoying life.

9, just got a driver's license last week, now driving on the road is not particularly skilled, do not dare to drive to a crowded place. Yesterday I finally plucked up the courage to drive a car to deliver to a customer, only to accidentally bump into a man on the road. I quickly apologized and said: I'm sorry, it's all my fault. The man said with a look of trepidation: No, no, buddy, it's my fault, in fact, I saw you around 200 places, but I haven't had time to climb the tree yet!

10. My mother-in-law asked me: Who cares about money with my son? Me: He manages it all, and when I manage money, I always lose money, so I leave it to him. Mother-in-law: Have you ever wondered why you always lose money? Me: Every time I lose it is 10 dollars, and he failed to pursue me. Mother-in-law: Have you ever suspected that my son took the money? When I returned home, I beat up my husband, and he did it all, or my mother-in-law was good to me!

11. Children who go to school in rural areas must know that they have to weed in school after two months of summer vacation. One day at the beginning of the school, some people brought hoes, some people brought shovels, some people brought sickles... I was so strong that I took 100 sheep from my family to school. At that time, my friends were stunned, this was the most imposing time of my life!

#Funny##Funny#Funny##搞笑一刻 #