laitimes

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

He Suohuan, a writer of sexual affective psychology, writes love stories, interesting strangers, and material knowledge.

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

Are there any "mom boys" around you?

A girl consulted me, and after listening to her marriage story, you will understand how much Ma Bao Man hurts marriage.

The girl has been married to her husband for 2 years, and she returned to her mother's house just after confinement, and she decided to wait for the divorce cooling-off period before going through the divorce procedures with her husband.

Why divorce?

This is not a sudden thought, but a dissatisfaction accumulated by a little contradiction in the two years of marriage.

She and her husband met through a blind date and got married in just 3 months.

After getting married, the husband did these "mom boy" things:

1. Treat her as an outsider, every time she is at home, her husband will pull her mother-in-law to whisper

2. Disrespect her, as long as she has a little dissatisfied opinion about her mother-in-law, her husband will lose her temper, even if it is indeed her mother-in-law who has done something wrong

3. Unconditionally obeying the opinion of her in-laws, she wanted to name the child herself, but was told by her husband: "When my mother names the child, you can't give it." ”

4. What's more excessive? During her confinement, her mother-in-law came to the house and took care of her in a beautiful name, but it made the girl very disgusting. There are 3 rooms in the family, she lives with her children, but her husband insists on sharing a room with her mother-in-law.

5. Before giving birth, she originally planned to find a confinement sister-in-law, but was blocked back by her husband's words: "My mother said, finding a confinement sister-in-law wastes money, it is not reliable, see for yourself." ”

All kinds of grievances and experiences flooded her heart, coupled with the fact that after giving birth, the woman's "postpartum mood" was very unstable, so she still decided to return to her mother's house.

Either wait for a divorce or let her see her husband change completely.

If he can't change, then he can only go the road of divorce.

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

What comes to mind when it comes to mom boy?

The explanation in the encyclopedia is:

People who listen to their mothers, who center everything on their mothers and are spoiled by their parents.

In fact, the real mom boy is far more "unacceptable" than you think.

A post came to mind:

The boy went to study in a foreign university, and his mother was worried that he would not eat well outside, so she quit her job and rented a house near the university to accompany her son through college.

To what extent is this boy mom boy?

He can't wash clothes, can't fold quilts, and even his underwear has to be washed by his mother, and his self-care ability is extremely poor.

Every time I talk to someone, I say, "My mom said it."

How do you feel about falling in love with such a guy?

Do you want to escape in minutes?

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

What are the characteristics of Ma Bao man?

1. Take parents as the center in everything and unconditionally obey their parents' opinions

In the concept of mom boy, they believe that what parents say is everything, and parents' advice is right.

What does this mean?

Explain that he is an unassertive person.

Without your own opinion, without your own sense of independence, you cannot think independently, and you cannot control your own life.

Even in love or marriage, they listen to their parents.

When his parents said they could continue talking, he would continue to talk;

When his parents said how to fall in love, he followed his parents' instructions.

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

2. When getting along with parents, there is no "sense of boundaries"

There is a saying: "Women avoid their fathers, and children avoid their mothers".

But in Ma Bao Man and Ma Bao Girl, this sense of boundaries is not visible at all.

When they get along with their parents, they are too intimate and have no personal space and freedom at all.

If the boy is single, this is his own life, and no one else can interfere.

But if he is in love, married, and still too close to his mother, what harm will this cause to his lover?

Women are naturally jealous, which is a provocation to a sense of security, emotional needs.

There is a subconscious "competitive relationship" between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law.

One is to compete for the love of the son, and the other is to compete for the love of the husband.

If a man lacks a sense of boundaries, it will only lead to deeper and deeper conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and finally cause the marriage to break down.

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

3. Treat your wife as an outsider, everything is your wife's fault

The most obvious characteristics of Ma Bao men are:

When chatting with others, I often use "my mom said" as a mantra.

Even with your lover, it's like this.

In marriage, the style of Ma Bao man is:

Treat the wife as an outsider, and every time the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflict, the man will stand on the mother's side and hang all the mistakes on the wife.

The wife does not know how much money there is in the family;

He was reluctant to tell his wife how much his monthly salary was paid and how he spent it;

He did not want to discuss everything big and small in the family, but with his parents.

Such a marriage is difficult to move an inch.

If the heart is not aligned, the home will be uncertain;

If the husband and wife have two hearts, it will be difficult for the marriage to continue.

If a man can't learn even the most basic respect, then he still doesn't want to enter into marriage.

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

Essentially: How is the Ma Bo Man formed?

Ultimately:

The mother is overly aggressive at home and shows extreme control when her son is very young.

Single-handedly determine the child's food, clothing, housing, study, life, social interaction and even feelings, so that the son cannot escape his will.

The mother has a strong personality and possessiveness, and she is indispensable in the original family.

In addition, a mother with such a character has only one child.

Nine times out of ten, this boy will become a mom boy.

To know:

Marriage has never been a matter between two people, but two families.

When a girl marries a mom boy, the biggest challenge is not the man, but your mother-in-law.

"Divorce after confinement, I want to remind all girls": Don't marry Ma Baomen

Today's Topic:

What do you think of Ma Bo Man?

(Article with picture source network)

Read on