He He found out that he had acute lymphoid leukemia, and Fang Yinuo did not tell the Xie family this
I don't quite understand that. This disease is not a small disease, it cannot be hidden at all, sooner or later I will know, I understand her intention in doing so, because Xie Dan originally hated their mother and daughter, and Hehe was not the granddaughter of the Xie family, and did not want to cause them trouble.
She didn't tell Xiao Lu at the first time, I really felt that there was a big problem, such a disease, as a cultural person, or a teacher, should immediately think that the treatment of this disease requires the child's biological father, she can still be so calm.
When it came time to inform Xiao Lu, Fang Yinuo chose to let Xiao Xu relay what an urgent and important thing it was, and it was normal to make a phone call himself! Xiao Lu went to the hospital, and she said lightly that xiao Lu should go home and rest well! See Xiao Lu too cool and thin!
Fang Yinuo's marriage failed, Xiao Lu had his fault, and Fang Yinuo's problem was not small. Looking carefully at Fang's mother's words and deeds, I found that Fang Yinuo's character defects had a lot to do with her mother.
First, the sense of superiority
When Fang Yinuo wanted to marry Xiao Lu, Fang's mother did not agree, she said that xiao Lu had no car, no house and no savings, only a passion, hard work, and vowed to make a promise to the other party for a lifetime.
From before marriage, Fang's mother has always looked down on Xiao Lu, thinking that her daughter is not married well, her daughter is so good, the job is also quite decent, marrying Xiao Lu is really too much of a loss, you can find a better one.
There is such a psychology, I can understand very well, as a parent, they all want their children to marry well, dare not say that they expect their daughters to fly up the branches and become phoenixes, at least they have to marry a family with the right door, and live better.
Because she despised Xiao Lu, even with Xiao Lu's family, Fang Mu also looked down on her. In front of the high color screen, Fang Mu is often a high-ranking appearance, very superior, and that arrogance cannot be concealed.
"Who are you in this family?"
Fang Mu's words can be seen that she is not satisfied with everyone in the Xiao family, the son-in-law is not satisfied, Xiao Xu is like a small, Gao Caiping is unreliable, a family, none of them can get into her eyes.
In this way, I think it is okay to talk in front of my daughter before marriage, and after marriage, I can even say it in front of Xiao's family. If you don't want your daughter to divorce, I think you can't say such words, once you say it, it is particularly hurtful, even if you reconcile, the son-in-law will have a thorn in his heart: the mother-in-law hates me, dislikes my mother, and dislikes our whole family.
Fang Mu let Gao Caiping buy vegetables according to the menu she opened, Gao Caiping said that there were too many dishes, afraid of not being able to eat, she said: You can rest assured, I have experience.
Her arrogance is particularly uncomfortable, like the boss is directing subordinates, can not be refuted, just do as she asks.
Because of Fang Mu's strength and arrogance, Xiao Lu was very uncomfortable, and the three women in the family were a team, and they looked like an outsider. Therefore, after work, Xiao Lu sometimes chooses to eat out, because he has to face two powerful women when he comes home, and he can't express his opinion.
Second, occupy the child
Gao Caiping is unreliable, indeed, she has bad habits, and Fang Yinuo does not want her to take children. Gao Caiping also listened to her words, she used to take the child to walk the bend when smoking, after the child fell, Gao Caiping directly quit smoking.
Family difficulties, no husband, the younger son is not angry, Gao Caiping is also very distressed, she herself is very self-aware, the words of the daughter-in-law and the words of the mother-in-law, she is obedient, will not face a set, behind the set, afraid that they are angry.
Fang's mother had a great opinion of her, even if she was willing to change, she still looked down on her, not even touching the child. At the first birthday banquet, Gao Caiping wanted to see her granddaughter, but Fang's mother would not let her see it, and let her go to the banquet hall to rest, without her help.
This is the first birthday gift of Gao Caiping's granddaughter, she is also the master of the first, help is the right thing to do, Fang Mother's approach is a bit inappropriate. Even if Gao Caiping can't help, it is okay to let her meet the guests together, not to let the child see, not to let help, to treat her as a "guest", no wonder Gao Caiping was not happy on the spot.
In Fang's mother's eyes, it is the child she brought, the child seems to be her family, and all her arrangements for the child are deserved. The child's grandmother, because she did not have the child and did not have money, she was not entitled to be close to the granddaughter.
Who doesn't get angry when they see it? If the mother-in-law's family is poor and the son has a child, can't the mother-in-law enjoy the joy of the world? Fang Mu's idea like this, I think it is very selfish.
Most of the children let the mother-in-law take it, and the fang mother forcibly took the child and let Gao Caiping leave the son's home, which was not authentic enough. Xiao Lu saw his mother, driven away by his mother-in-law, and did not let him take his granddaughter, he must have felt bad in his heart!
With the child, I think it should be discussed, if because you don't like the mother, you deprive the child of the right to enjoy the love of the grandmother, but also a kind of harm to the child, multiple people hurt the child is always good, Fang Yinuo is the same as her.
If Gao Caiping doesn't like children, is not willing to change, and is not good for children, that is another matter. Gao Caiping liked Hehe very much, and she did it wholeheartedly, so she should be close to the child.
3. Divorce
As a person who came over, Fang Mu knew the real situation of married life, it was inevitable that the two sons bumped into each other, and when the two children had conflicts, she helped the girl to speak and counted Xiao Lu.
After Xiao Lu's affair with Zhu Zhu was made public, Fang's mother was very angry and directly asked her daughter not to go back, which meant that she had lived in her own home for a long time and could not be reconciled again. Gao Caiping took her son to the door, and Fang's mother did not give any face, and returned the gift.
When encountering such a thing as a son-in-law, as a mother, I think I should first figure out the situation, and then think about whether I can live, if I can live, I should talk to my daughter alone, and let my daughter reflect on it, and then think of a solution. She did not do this, directly refused to face the problem, a jin in front of her daughter said that Xiao Lu's is not, can not see any problems with her daughter.
When the husband and wife encounter things, the old man's approach is very important, the purpose is to let the two people continue to live, they should talk well, solve the problem is the key, and put forward their own requirements for Xiao Lu.
When Fang Yinuo made up her mind to divorce, Fang's mother began to be anxious, telling her daughter that it was not easy to take a child alone, and asking her not to be impulsive. When it was time to analyze her daughter well, she did not analyze, and has been irrationally venting her dissatisfaction, encouraging her daughter to divorce, and her daughter is going to divorce, and she said to let her daughter consider it carefully.
If she talks to Fang Yinuo well, and then calls Xiao Lu and Gao Caiping, everyone sits together, talks about it, and talks about things, maybe the two of them can continue to live.
For the sake of her son's good life, Gao Caiping is willing to be a nanny in her son's home, serving a large family, without complaint, because she is for the good of her son, and her own grievances are swallowed.
Fang Mu, like Fang Yinuo, only cares about her own feelings and self-esteem, and when she is not happy, she wants to vent. Marriage is different from other things, and when it is time to "repair", it must be "repaired". What Fang Mu taught her daughter was that she did not like things, and immediately changed, she let her mother go, and let her daughter divorce.
Many things are not calculated in this way, not black and white, when encountering people and things you don't like in marriage, you have to consider the overall situation, how to let the child's family live better.
Fourth, Fang Yinuo's "absolute", with her mother
Fang Yinuo's "absolute" was absolutely inherited from her mother.
Fang's mother is also a strong person, she helps her daughter with her children, she has to take her granddaughter for herself, and will not consider the feelings of others. Fang Yinuo is the same, in the married life, she has not learned to consider the feelings of others and balance the marriage.
Xiao Lu is not careful enough in dealing with family affairs and children, which is undeniable. Looking at Fang Yinuo again, she was also a person who couldn't listen to his words, so she let Xiao Lu go home and rest, and Xiao Lu did so, because Xiao Lu knew that Fang Yinuo would not listen to other people's words at all.
As a teacher, she is accustomed to having absolute authority in front of her students, reprimanding students, and students dare not resist. At home, Fang Yinuo was the same for her husband, used to directing, and didn't need Xiao Lu to have ideas, just do it.
Fang Yinuo's personality, the relationship with the original family is very large, the eyes can not tolerate sand, independent mastery habits, do not like to break with others, solve the problem is also simple and rude.
Fang's mother did not like Gao Caiping, and directly let her do housework, and the child's affairs did not need her to take care of it. The son-in-law has other women outside, in the case of not figuring it out, she directly asked her daughter to ignore them, Gao Caiping came to the door to apologize, her behavior, is not at all to solve the problem, is to let the daughter divorce.
Fang Yinuo, like her mother, after the divorce, did not let the child see her biological father, which was very selfish, and the character of the child was not good, but his revenge for Xiao Lu's "cheating" did not allow him to see his daughter.
Xie Tianhua could wait for her for so many years, regardless of whether she was a divorced woman with a child, and treated Hehe as her own child. Xiao Lu made a mistake, he could not forgive, even the child would not let him see, Fang Yinuo's personality, very similar to her mother, like to calculate, suffer losses will feel particularly wronged, but also very vengeful.
Nothing can be solved, consider your own feelings, you should also think in a different position. Fang's mother's family conditions are good, if she can help her daughter and take care of Xiao Lu's emotions, this family will be more harmonious.
Fang Yinuo only saw the hardships of his mother with the child, did not see Xiao Lu sandwiched in the middle of the embarrassment, even if he knew that his mother was unreliable, but all day long to see his wife and mother-in-law treat their mother as people, his heart was also uncomfortable.
In marriage, if you calculate too clearly, you will not live well, if you only see your own efforts, do not know how to tolerate each other, then such a marriage will also be very tired.
Fifth, mother-in-law and mother-in-law, should be sober
The mother-in-law and the mother-in-law are in a small family at the same time, if both people are reasonable, the relationship between husband and wife is fine, if one party is unreasonable, then the relationship between husband and wife will inevitably not be good.
Once the old man mixes with the young man's affairs, then there will be many more things in the family. Fang's mother's arrogance and Gao Caiping's condescending perfection made Xiao Lu and Fang Yinuo uncomfortable, and they both wanted to take care of the emotions of others to their mother.
Fang's mother has been giving advice to her daughter, Gao Caiping is willing to believe in her son's arrangement, the gap between the two people can be seen, and Fang's mother manages too much.
As parents, when you go to your child's home, you are all guests. Fang Mu felt that this was her daughter's home, her home, but she did not think that it was Gao Caiping's home.
The child's home is the child's home, it will not be his own home, if he regards himself as the master and lives in the child's home, then the child's marital feelings will inevitably have problems.
The best way is to treat yourself as a guest, respect your child's decisions, and reconcile your child's marital issues when appropriate. I have experience in married life, and I can't take myself as the big one, arrange the married life of my children, and even add fuel to the fire.
If Gao Caiping and Fang Mu can treat themselves as guests, listen to their children, and point out their children's shortcomings, then Xiao Lu and Fang Yinuo will not go to the step of divorce.
Author: Muzi