The old saying has clouds: home and everything is happy! Only when a family has a solid and harmonious family relationship will it be happy. Whether poor or rich, only when the family is peaceful can it have warmth and blessings. You've reached retirement age, do you know how to love your family?
Family internal friction is always the enemy on the road to happiness, whether it is for lovers or children, there is no harmony between relatives, basically there is no happiness to speak of. If you want a happy old age, do these things at home:
First, abandon old stubborn ideas
A friend's family has a grandfather, retired for many years, the body is tough, but the temper is very bad, from the young unit leader, but also the family 'treasurer'!
Having raised so many children, the children have never been loved by their fathers since they were young. Every meal the old lady made, whether it was meat dishes or vegetarian dishes, as long as it was out of the pot, he always ate it first, drank a little wine, put it down, ate and drank enough, and lay on the bed and slept.
The children always went to the kitchen after he had finished eating. When it was time for the old lady to call him to get up and go to work, if something delayed him and called him to get up late, it was inevitable that there would be an insult.
After so many years, the old man's temper has not changed at all, and he has become more and more stubborn. For example, last month he had a birthday, the children in the family have rushed back with gifts to accompany him to celebrate his birthday, usually the children are gathered together during the New Year's Festival, this time to catch the old man's birthday on the appointment to come back together, who knows the children with gifts, just entered the door to see the old man a look of displeasure, asked the old lady to know, he himself in the garden planted vegetables, was cut by the neighbor's dog a lot of damage, early in the morning with the neighbor for half a day, at noon lying on the bed sulking, the children outside chattering, Because he didn't like the children of the grandchildren to be noisy, he shouted to let everyone go home, and the two daughters and the son-in-law kindly persuaded, not only did not let him relax, but also angered the old man, threw the gifts bought by everyone to the yard, a good birthday party was disturbed by the chickens and dogs, and everyone went home in a gray and slippery way!
Some people are officials in the unit, go home to achieve absolute dominance, control everyone's mood and emotions, in fact, this is very wrong, after all, being a leader in the unit sometimes needs to guide the work, there is a little shelf is normal, but the home is not a place where there is a high or low, everyone in the family is equal, whether it is a father, mother or child, it should be an equal status. The child has made a mistake, of course, the parents have the right to teach the child, but there can be no difference in personality, the child is not your appendage, not your toy, from the personality point of view must be treated equally. Like the old man of a friend's family, he can't set a good example for the younger generations, and the grandchildren will only remember that his grandfather is a person who loses his temper and is unreasonable, where there is still amiable, where there is respect!
Second, cherish the lover, the old companion
Both husband and wife in a family should respect each other as guests, and should know respect and courtesy.
There is no husband and wife in the family who is more powerful than whom, and no one is worse than whom, no matter who earns more money and who earns less money, no matter who takes care of the family and who takes care of the family less, whether it is a strong man or a weak woman or a weak man or a strong woman, they should uphold a fair principle and should also respect each other extremely!
Some men feel that they are the head of the family, and the income in the family depends on themselves, so they dictate to their wives, and they act as nannies or people all day long, drinking and drinking, which is very disrespectful.
Some women see other people's husbands, the official position makes a lot of money, they have all kinds of dislike for their husbands, dislike their husbands have no money, dislike their husbands, dislike their husbands for their incompetence, cowardly and incompetent! This kind of woman is very unwise, and very stupid.
Those who earn money outside should be grateful for taking care of the elderly and children at home, and those who take care of their home at home should be grateful for the hard work outside.
Husband and wife two people together, mutual possession should respect each other, this is the most basic etiquette, only what they have is the best, just envy others, there is no use at all. Other people's money won't be spent on you, and when you're sick and hospitalized, they won't take care of you.
Wife and wife, half a life has not abandoned you, you can't reach the age of dozens and don't know how to be considerate of cold and warm, the other party and you are with you, is it trying to be bullied by you?
Third, we must reduce expectations for children, let alone restrict freedom
Some people have doted on him from a young age, grown up and feel that the child is incompetent, did not follow the route they planned to develop, school is not good, work is not good, career is not good, as if nothing can be worth his satisfaction, some parents especially like to say to their children - Lao Tzu is as old as you, how did it happen back then! This kind of talk is very hurtful to the child's heart, and there is no benefit except to make the child more rebellious and dissatisfied with himself.
The child's life path needs him to walk freely, and the road you pave for him may not be happy for him to walk, nor will he necessarily be willing to work in the direction you say.
Everyone grows up looking forward to the approval of their parents, yearning for freedom, and longing to get rid of the control of others. Do not want to develop according to your life plan, are the child in the growth process of the necessary stage, you hate him is not self-motivated, he may have found his dream in other places, but you do not respect him, a family of children and parents are also equal.
The family is not a battlefield, father and son are not enemies, and when they encounter problems, they should understand each other, not resent each other.
The wisest thing for an elderly person worthy of respect from his descendants is to accept the ordinariness of his own father, accept his own ordinariness, and accept the ordinariness of his children.
Life is alive, a lifetime of busyness, some people have completed their ambitions and dreams, some people are ordinary, there is no big achievement, but on the road to the pursuit of happiness, everyone is equal, with a warm and harmonious and happy family, is the greatest goal of everyone's life, but also the greatest achievement of a person's life - worthy of everyone's respect.