Original | Pregnancy
Generational kisses, kisses and kisses!
For most grandparents, the preference for grandchildren is irrational, and what is given is as much as they want.
But some old people really don't deserve to be grandparents.
On April 13, a surveillance video of "grandparents slapping their 3-year-old granddaughter in turn" in Henan was on the hot search, causing heated discussions on the whole Internet.
The video is 7 minutes long, and during these 7 minutes, the grandmother beats her granddaughter for 7 minutes.
Slap and palm turn, some netizens watched the video count: The little girl was slapped 41 times!
And the reason for the violent beating of the 3-year-old granddaughter was that the granddaughter tore a few pages of the book.
After watching the original video, it was really infuriating.
In the video, the little girl sits on the sofa and tears up a few pages of books, and the grandmother with the mop slaps her granddaughter as soon as she enters the house.
The beaten girl subconsciously returned her hand, and the grandmother thought that the child was not convinced, so she imprisoned the little girl with one hand.
Then, one, two... Played for about 20 seconds.
The girl's cry attracted her brother and grandmother, who wanted to protect her sister and kept shouting "Don't hit my sister".
But grandma raised her hand and beat her brother together.
The grandfather on the side did not dissuade, but beat his granddaughter with his grandmother.
The girl was beaten and cried, but the grandparents did not stop, but continued to beat, slap and beat the palms ...
My brother wanted to protect my sister three times, but my strength was too small to stop my grandmother from doing it.
The video is 7 minutes long, and at the end the little girl is beaten by her grandparents until she vomits...
Listening to the crying of the girl and brother through the comments was really heartbreaking.
Of course, children need education to tear up books, but this is obviously beyond the level of normal education, which is domestic violence and abuse.
Many netizens who watched the video were very angry and found the child's mother through the video.
According to the mother, the child was not beaten for the first time, but this time was the most ruthless, and the grandparents also put the child outside to get in the rain because the child had sprinkled food, even barefoot.
Seeing the child being beaten violently, netizens persuaded the mother to divorce, but the mother said: can't leave, both parents do not allow.
It's really hard to imagine how much children have to bear growing up in such a family.
A 3-year-old child is the happiest age to enjoy a good childhood.
I hope that this mother can protect her children, call the police, divorce, and give the children a warm home without violence.
①
Good people come out under the stick?
Parents, it's illegal to beat their children!
To educate children, there is obviously a better way than fighting.
Many parents choose the most useless and incompetent stick education.
Too many parents beat their children in the name of educating them.
In Fuzhou, Fujian Province, a 9-year-old girl was stripped naked and beaten by her mother, and the beaten child was crying out in tears...
Even across the screen, the child's crying is heartbreaking.
Image source: (@头条新闻)
According to the police report, the mother beat the child because of her child's education problems, and her emotions were out of control.
In Xi'an, Shaanxi Province, a man beat three little girls with a hanger, and the man used all his strength to whip the children.
The girl in purple was beaten and ran all over the house.....
The girl in red was beaten by the hanger, rolling on the ground in pain, crying and begging for mercy ...
The hanger was pumped on the children one by one, and none of the three children were spared, and the children were beaten and screamed, crying bitterly, kneeling and begging for mercy..........
And the beater is the father of the child, and when he violently beats the child, the man keeps saying: Remember? Remember?
The children cried and shouted in despair: Remember! Remember!
A 3-year-old girl in Meishan, Sichuan, was slapped 9 times by her mother in just 45 seconds because she did not eat properly, and she was knocked to the ground many times....
Even if the photographer is in another building, the sound of the slap can be heard.
What did the children do wrong and need to be beaten to death like this?
This is no longer simply educating children, but domestic violence, which is illegal.
According to the provisions of the mainland's Law on the Protection of Minors: parents or other guardians shall create a good and harmonious family environment, perform guardianship duties and support obligations for minors in accordance with the law, and prohibit domestic violence against minors!
Stop doing illegal things in the name of educating children.
Children are naughty by nature, it is inevitable to make mistakes, but education is not equal to scolding, and scolding is not good at educating children!
②
Scolding in the name of love
It is the most incompetent performance of parents!
Shockingly, in the news comments of many parents beating their children, some netizens actually said:
"It's normal family education for parents to beat their children like this."
"It's normal to be beaten like this when I was a child."
"Children, parents beat their children for your own good, and you must be filial in the future."
That's right, to this day, there are still people who think that "good people come out from under the golden stick, filial piety comes out under the stick, children can't become talents if they don't fight, and parents beat their children because of love." ”
But can these violence in the name of love really make children better? Contrary.
A netizen said this: When I was a child, I was also beaten like this, beaten with a stick, smoked with a hanger, to be honest, such a severe beating not only has no effect, but will only make me think of more excuses for doing bad things in the future, because there is no educational meaning at all, I don't remember what I did wrong, but I remember that I was beaten half to death because of a small thing, and many times they told me about the wrong things I remember for a lifetime! ”
There are obviously better ways to educate than fighting, but some parents choose the cruelest and most useless shortcut.
I have a friend next to me who beat the child violently because he lied, and he said that if he didn't beat it, he would become a liar king in the future, just beat it.
But the fact is that since that day, the child has lied more often, the toy has been damaged and said that the sister has damaged it, everything is pushed on others, and everything is made to make excuses.
Once, he talked to the child calmly, and he asked the child: Why do you always lie, why do you always make excuses?
The child lowered his head and said: If I tell you the truth, I will be beaten again!
Because they are afraid of being beaten, they make excuses to find reasons, and even use lies to fulfill more lies.
Because I am afraid of being beaten, I try my best not to be discovered the next time I do something bad.
The American Academy of Pediatrics points out that any form of domestic violence is opposed, because the use of beatings to educate children is not only ineffective, but also endangers the physical and mental health of the baby, and even makes them more disobedient.
Instead of making children better, violence makes what parents think is "bad" give birth to more branches.
③
In addition to scolding
There is actually a better way to educate children!
We cannot deny that there are still many parents who use beatings to educate their children.
But can't help but hit the child, do you know how terrible the consequences are?
Hitting, or short-term can make the child obedient, but long-term hitting and scolding of the child, will make the situation worse the most.
First: Hitting and scolding the child destroys the child's self-confidence
Because children who are often beaten are either angry, full of anger, and become extremely rebellious when they grow up, or full of fear, frightened, and become obedient because of fear when they grow up, and some children even fall into depression and can't extricate themselves!
Without children who enjoy the love and affirmation of their parents, it is difficult for them to be confident.
Second: Hitting and scolding the child will make the child believe that the fist is the only way to solve the problem.
Children like to imitate their parents, and if parents scold their children, children will think that hitting people is allowed.
Third: Hitting and scolding the child will make the child no longer able to enjoy the parent-child relationship.
Chen Qiaoen once confessed in a reality TV show: he is a sensitive and withdrawn person.
She was beaten to the big by her mother since she was a child, slapped, beaten by dead branches until she bleed... The long period of scolding made her very afraid of her mother, and that shadow was hidden in her heart and could not be extinguished.
The injury of being beaten by parents will heal at that time, but the injury in the heart is really like a stinger, which will penetrate deeply into the child's heart, and it hurts when touched!
Parents, blindly beating and scolding their children can only prove your incompetence.
Because hitting a child is just the worst way parents can come up with to save trouble.
Children who are naughty will inevitably make mistakes, appropriate "punishment", edutainment, teaching according to aptitude... It's much more effective than simple brutal scolding.
(1) If the child scribbles, throws and throws...
Parents can guide their children to take responsibility for their own actions, let the children be responsible for sweeping the floor, cleaning tables and chairs, storing toys, etc., if the child is too young (under 3 years old), parents can accompany the child.
You can also set up a "graffiti wall" for your child, which not only meets the child's needs for drawing, but also exercises the child's self-care ability.
(2) If the child does not want to go to school, rebels...
When it comes to their children's judgment, not going to school, and messing around, many parents will feel angry, but there is a father in Shaanxi who gives a different way of dealing with it.
The 11-year-old daughter was rebellious and did not want to go to school, so the single father let his daughter go to the fields to dig in the fields under the scorching sun, so that she could experience the daily work of her father and grandfather.
After 4 hours of tanning, his face was peeling, and his father was naturally distressed when he looked at it, but he firmly believed that if he did not eat the hardships of studying, he would suffer the hardships of life.
Yes, only by truly experiencing the hardships of life can we deeply appreciate the meaning of learning!
(3) If the child is noisy, takes the initiative to cause trouble, and quarrels.....
Parents can set up a "thinking corner" at home, put up cushions or chairs, let the child sit alone, or stand and think, prepare a clock, remember the punishment time, pay attention not to too long, generally ≤ 10 minutes, parents should accompany them.
After the punishment, parents guide their children to say why they were punished today.
(4) If the child throws toys and is not affected by toys.....
Parents can confiscate toys littered by their children and guide them to say why they confiscate them and whether they realize that it is wrong.
The act of littering should be corrected from the beginning.
(5) If the child repeatedly teaches and does not change, the more he does not let it, the more he has to do it...
Parents can let their children experience the consequences of wrong practices without causing great harm to their children.
For example, if the water cup is hot and cannot be touched, but the child wants to touch it, let the child feel the taste of being scalded under the premise of not burning the child.
Netizen Qiao Daddy also shared a story: her daughter found the packaged foam box very fun, so she broke it open with great interest.
Before playing, he told his daughter: this bubble is not easy to clean up, and you have to clean up the house yourself after playing.
About 1 hour later, my daughter came out covered in foam and said, "I don't want to play!"
In the process of cleaning up the bubble, the daughter collapsed several times and shouted that she didn't want to clean up, and the father clearly said to his daughter while helping his daughter: I understand your mood, I can share your work, but your responsibility cannot be shirked!
In this way, the father and daughter tossed for more than an hour to clean up the foam scraps, and afterwards the daughter excitedly shouted: I am the big hero who picks up foam!
This method is indeed very good, in the process of education, let children experience "natural results", so that children can learn to bear the consequences themselves, learn to be responsible for their own actions.
Isn't the above method more meaningful than scolding.
Finally, I want to say that the parenting style of parents, the imprint left by the child will follow the child's life, communication and guidance, is the only way to education!
Stop blindly beating and scolding children in the name of education, under the pretext of love, under the guise of "for your good"! The problems that arise in the process of children's growth are all due to certain inner needs.
The right thing to do is to understand the child, respect the child, and discipline the child in a gentle and firm way, which is what a qualified parent should look like, so as to plant more confidence and tenacity in the child's personality! In order to let the child grow up confidently and happily!