01
Someone once said that this is a world of contradictions to the extreme.
The purpose of ordinary people raising children is not only to pass on the generations, but also to raise children and prevent old age. However, when "raising children and preventing the elderly" becomes the moment of history, I believe that all contradictions will appear.
Between parents and children, there will be conflicts for the sake of "old-age care"; between middle-aged people and young people, there will be conflicts for material interests. Everything is not as beautiful as we think.
Take the situation of the post-60s and post-70s, do you think they can still have a beautiful old age of "raising children and preventing aging"?
In fact, everything is difficult to say. Especially in this society that is extremely involved, young people can't even support themselves, so why talk about supporting their parents?
With the intensification of vicious competition and the change of the concept of human nature, the previous "pension" has become the helpless "nibbling on the old" today. Parents can only accept it willingly, and cannot change it.
As family affection gradually fades, there is a certain gap between children and parents. In this way, the abandonment of "parents" will also become an ironclad reality.
From being gnawed at to being abandoned, the misfortune of the post-60s and post-70s may have just begun.
02
Being chewed on is a trend that cannot be changed.
There is such a couple in the circle, they are professors at a university in a second-tier city, anyway, they have made a lot of money, and there are several houses in second-tier cities.
However, their son was admitted to a university in Beijing and told his parents that he wanted to study hard and settle down in Beijing.
After four years of college, he did not work, but rented an apartment in Beijing to continue to prepare for graduate school. However, he took the exam for two years and still couldn't pass the exam. At the age of 25, he can only find a job in Beijing, hoping to meet opportunities and change his destiny.
His parents also lamented that this child had been preparing for the exam for two years and had no work experience. And has been staying in Beijing, this living cost is really high, this rent is really expensive, there is no way, can only follow him.
After working in Beijing for three years, my son met a nice girl. After some discussion, they made a decision to stay in Beijing and start a family in Beijing.
In order to realize this wish, the son can only confess his heart to his parents. The parents also felt that their son's suggestion was still very good, so they sold 4 houses, and borrowed some money everywhere, and bought a three-bedroom and one living room of 88 square meters in Beijing.
The couple also shook their heads and sighed that in order to buy this house, they basically used up their life savings, and even sold all the properties in the second-tier cities, and could only move back to the old house to live, and finally became "child slaves".
Moreover, the children are about to get married, which makes them a special headache. Parents have no money, children have no money, how to get married? It's contemplative.
03
To be abandoned, it is a kind of helplessness.
My friend Mr. Zhang is 55 years old this year, and he bought a house for his son in Guangzhou with all his money and gave him money to get married. However, after he started his family, he rarely interacted with his parents.
For the child's alienation from his parents, Mr. Zhang was particularly angry, so he said to his son: "Now that I am still young, I don't need you to retire, why can't you even meet your parents for a month?" If I am old in the future and you still treat your parents like this, then what is the use of me raising you? ”
After listening to his father's words, the son only said one sentence: "Dad, it's not that I don't want to support you, but I can't even support my family now, and the work pressure is very heavy, and I can't do anything about it!" ”
Mr. Zhang shook his head and replied to him: "You can live well." ”
Otherwise, what else can Mr. Zhang do?
Mr. Zhang himself is in business, and he also knows that today's world is not very good, it is not easy to make money, and the pressure on young people is also very large, without parents, then they may even have problems getting married and having children.
Slowly, he recalled his past experience, thirty years ago, maybe he was a little poor, but there were many opportunities, the market was not saturated, and naturally it could be found. Nowadays, it is difficult for young people.
Abandonment is not something the child intended to do. It is that children can't even support themselves, so why talk about supporting their parents?
04
Talking about today's family relationships, it really makes people cry and laugh.
The post-60s and post-70s generations hope that their children can get ahead, have higher education, find good jobs, and thus change their destiny.
However, when the post-60s and post-70s reach the age of 50, they fully understand that even if the children surpass themselves in ability and education, they still do not earn much, and even half of the wealth and achievements of their parents cannot be achieved.
Therefore, the child chews on the old age, or the parent is abandoned by the child, and it becomes a reality.
We may wish to think about the question, children surpass their parents in terms of ability and education, but why are they still inferior to their parents in wealth and achievement?
In a word, everything is soaring, wages are not rising, that is the norm.
There is such a friend who is an HR, he told me that in the past, six thousand yuan for an undergraduate student, and now six thousand yuan for a graduate student. Academic qualifications are progressing, and salaries are standing still. Today, when you are in the inner volume, you don't do it, and there are still a lot of people fighting to do it.
It can be said that the more young people are in vicious competition, the more they cannot make money, they cannot afford to buy a house, they cannot afford to get married, they cannot afford to raise children, and they cannot provide for their parents.
It can only be said that the post-60s and post-70s will eventually face the reality of "being abandoned" and "being gnawed on". That is not a problem of a family, but a trend of the general environment.
Wen/Shushan has deer