Text | Rice grain mom
Having ten children, and having an alcoholic husband, does such a housewife have a future?
The film is based on true events and has a Douban score of 8.1.
The heroine, Ryan, is a very intelligent, optimistic housewife with ten very intelligent and lovely children, who struggle with the shackles of the family and constantly search for herself.
Rice grain mother feels that every girl should take a good look at this movie, which will definitely bring you different gains.
Before getting married, Lane had a very decent job, she was a newspaper writer, talented and charismatic.
At that time, her husband was also a small and popular singer, polite and personable.
But after getting married, everything changed.
They had ten children, and in order to take care of the children, Ryan became a housewife, lost a decent job, and the family had to rely on her husband to support her.
But the bad thing is that the husband can't support their family at all.
Why? After getting married, her husband had a car accident, lost the singing voice he relied on for a living, and forced to make a living, he had to work in a machinery factory, and his life fell by leaps and bounds.
It is reasonable to say that going to work in a machinery factory can also earn some living expenses for children to learn and live, as long as the life is well managed, it will not be too bad.
After experiencing a car accident, her husband has been depressed, living in pain all day, unwilling to face the cruel reality, and taking all the money he earns to buy wine and drink.
What about at home? He didn't care.
Because of her husband's inaction, their family is already too poor to open the pot, even the milk fee can not be paid, the daily living expenses rely on Ryan to participate in the advertising word design competition, win a little Weibo bonus and prizes to supplement the family, and struggle to maintain life.
In the marriage, Ryan gradually lost himself, and could only rely on the writing he loved to find a little of his former self.
She sacrificed almost everything for the sake of her family.
But despite this, she has always worked hard and is very optimistic, even in front of outsiders, it has given the incompetent husband enough face.
By chance, Lane won the "Ten Minutes free shopping" award, and at the agreed time, the family rushed into the supermarket to shop.
In ten minutes, Lane took all the family's desires, the children's favorite steaks, cans, candies, cocktails that her husband had always had in mind, and all kinds of daily necessities.
But what really belonged to her, Ryan didn't take a single one.
What does Mom like? Mom's favorite, as if it was just a smile from the family.
I remember, when I was in elementary school, there was a time when I was on the ideological character, the teacher asked everyone what they liked, and the classmates all rushed to say, you said a word to me.
But when the teacher asked if he knew what his mother liked, the classroom was quiet.
That scene, after many years, the rice grain mother can not forget.
Because the landlord wants to repossess the house, the Lane family can only borrow money to buy a house, yes, the money to buy a house is still using Lane's bonus.
But when buying a house, the title deed can only write the name of her husband, because Lane has no job, although the money to buy the house is earned by Lane himself.
After signing the contract, the staff member said to her husband: "Congratulations, you are now the owner of the house." ”
Ryan had a bitter smile of helplessness on his face.
Seeing this, the rice grain mother wants to say that although housewives have paid a lot for their families, they are really working for the family day and night, but sadly, on most levels, the efforts of housewives are not recognized.
In most people's minds, a housewife is not a formal job, but fulfills an obligation born of love.
To fulfill obligations, but there are no rights to enjoy, the status of housewives in society is really low and low.
The family happily moved into a new house, and the husband felt that the fact that he had bought the house by his wife made him very faceless, which showed his incompetence and began to drink heavily.
After getting drunk, he began to play drunkards, frantically destroying the furniture prizes that Ryan had earned from his writing.
Because the movement was too great, the neighbor called the police, and the police and priest came to the house, but did not blame the husband in the slightest.
They took it for granted that it was all Ryan's fault, that she hadn't been so considerate of her husband that she had made such a crazy move.
Because it is not easy for the husband to support the family, he has paid a lot for this family, and the housewife's efforts, sorry, can not be seen.
Ryan listened to the words of the police and the priest, and could only respond with silence, and the fatigue and sadness under his eyes could not be hidden.
Who is not sacrificing for the family? But why should a housewife give everything in her body and mind, but in exchange for being forced to tolerate compromise again and again.
Society's harshness on housewives will naturally become a "powerful backing" for husbands to do whatever they want.
Anyway, no matter what humiliating things you do, it is because of your wife's "unkindness."
Ryan's husband, he has never taken on the responsibilities of the family, whether as a husband or a father, he is not qualified, to shield the family from the wind and rain, to regard the family as the first, he did not do it.
But society still has very loose requirements for them, as long as they occasionally take a little money home, they are a good man.
Invisibly, the whole society is setting limits for housewives, as if they are separated from their families and husbands, and their lives are meaningless.
As the days passed, the husband was still doing nothing and drinking heavily all day, but the children had begun to grow up and began to leave home to go out to study.
One day, Lane received a letter from a group of housewives who, liked to participate in an advertising word design contest, invited her to a party to discuss her favorite writing.
But because of family trivia, Ryan has not had the opportunity to participate, and her husband does not support her at all, saying that the fuel cost is too expensive and refuses to drive her.
Ryan waited for years, and finally survived until his daughter learned to drive, and asked her daughter to take her to the party.
Ryan was happy, and over the years, because of the bondage of the family, she had very few opportunities to go out and enjoy her own personal time.
The daughters were also happy for their mother from the bottom of their hearts, and they enjoyed the beautiful scenery along the way, and finally reached their destination after experiencing a car breakdown and repairing it again.
At the party, everyone talked and enjoyed the good time, and this day was the happiest day of Ryan's life.
But when he got home, Ryan found that her husband was mad again, locked the children out of the door, and accused Ryan of coming home too late.
Ryan felt so aggrieved and sad that during the argument she spilled jam on her husband and remembered a wonderful advertising slogan.
In the end, the husband took the initiative to admit his mistake, saying that he was afraid that Ryan would never return, so he would be so angry, and bought a beautiful set of desks for Ryan.
Ryan was touched, but also very confused, this desk looks worth a lot, where did he get the money to buy it?
A few days later, Ryan received a call from the bank and learned that her husband had mortgaged the family's house and could not pay it back, and the family would face homelessness.
The mess was eventually left to Ryan, who arranged a place for each child and the family was separated.
Thankfully, that brilliant ad line saved the family again, and Ryan won the prize again! The big bonus fills the hole in the house, and the family can live together.
Even though this was a happy thing, the daughter of the distressed mother cried a mess.
The father always put the family in danger, and then let it go, the mother gave everything for the family, this time luckily escaped, so what about the next time?
The daughter knows very well that if the father does not change, the family will have to break up sooner or later.
On the way to send Ryan to a party, the daughter once asked her mother if she regretted marrying her father.
That's when her mother gave her a negative answer.
But the daughter spoke from her heart:
"You've been dragged down by this home for more than twenty years, and you could have lived in a bustling city, written articles for newspapers, and had a good life."
Ryan touched his daughter's head and replied:
"I have a good life right now."
She has always been full of optimism, never complained about life, set an example for her children by example, and entrusted her blessings, and the children grew up healthy and grew into a kind appearance.
But her hardships, the children are actually in the eyes, when the parents argue, all the children will firmly stand on the side of the mother, they try their best to be considerate of the mother, all the children are in their own way to love the mother.
Fortunately, after this crisis, the husband finally began to repent, he stopped squandering, and began to save money.
The boom in advertising contests faded, Ryan never won any more prize money, the children had grown up and moved out of the house, and life was good.
Based on true events, the poet Terry Lane wrote his memoir " From Ohio ' Winners : How My Mother Raised Ten Children in Less Than Twenty-Five Words " in Honor of Her Great Mother " , which was later remade into a film.
The film takes place in the 1950s and 1960s, and based on the limitations of the times, Ryan can't make more choices, can't live his life as he pleases, and hasn't been able to achieve his dreams.
But she has done a commendable job as a housewife, and she runs the whole family on her own.
Rice grain mother is thinking, the era at that time, indeed to a certain extent limited women's life choices, Lane became a housewife although "no complaints and no regrets", but behind this, there must also be a lot of "helplessness".
Nowadays, the times have changed, and society has provided more and more jobs for women, which allows women to freely choose their own lives and chase their dreams.
I hope that every woman can choose her own life path after careful consideration, there is no regret-free life, all we can do is to live with less regrets.
About the author: @Rice Grain Mom Love To Share (Welcome to Pay Attention), American returnee, Haidian parent, when the first place in the new book list "Parent-child English Book That Affects Children's Life" author. Focus on the scientific parenting of 0-5-year-old babies, learning enlightenment, and the world's novelty recommendation, welcome to pay attention! (5-12 years old bao mom please pay attention to: @ rice grain mother channel)