The "widowed marriage" we refer to is usually a description and description of dissatisfaction with married life, generally speaking, it is aimed at the imbalance caused by one of the spouses not shouldering the roles and obligations that the partner should play, and is nominally married, but still lives like a single dog.
However, compared with the normal "widowed" marriage, a new type of "widowed" marriage was found, and it seems that many families have such a problem, that is, he does not listen to anything you say, and he believes everything others say.
Relatively speaking, women will be more likely to encounter this problem, let their men do something, he is the wind, the messages sent are also sinking into the sea, on the other party's mobile phone, almost all are unread messages, but when others have requests, immediately incarnate as a savior to help solve the problem.
In life, women are born to pay attention to details, but also have their own experience, but when they are bitter and coaxed and intimidated, like a child, they break open and knead the things that their men say, the other party is deaf and even says that there is nothing wrong with finding things, but if the same words come from the mouths of others, they are glad to accept, convinced,
Therefore, many emotional women will describe themselves as air people, indispensable for survival, but they can be ignored.
And the root of all this is probably because the love was not too deep at the beginning
Because when you reach the age, when you reach the age when you should get married, you have to find someone who feels "suitable" in all aspects to form a family, and the emotional foundation is not up to standard, and it is difficult to put it in your heart.
We say it vulgarly, loving a person will naturally have a sunk cost investment in the early stage, and sometimes that care is for the lover, but also for their own investment in "products". Just as the so-called easy to get is not cherished, a person who has no love, because of the conditions and must come together, it is difficult to really take the other party's words to heart, your requirements and suggestions, even if you hear it is the left ear in the right ear out.
Their own literacy and wisdom
A person who can put his daughter-in-law in his heart is not simply because of love, but also knows how to respect her others out of his own qualities.
Whether you will encounter a new type of "widowed" marriage depends on how literate you find a partner, a person who knows how to respect his lover, the more he can balance his career and family, and the more such a person, the better he can run his life.
Why are some men indifferent to their daughter-in-law's words? Regardless of love and non-love, the key is not to see, he already thinks you are stupid, how can he listen to any advice.
However, the wise man knows how to listen to anyone's point of view, absorb the experience of different people, especially the advice of the lover, and let the person who loves himself be respected, which is also a grateful response, because knowing the pros and cons and understanding that respecting others is the best way to respect themselves.
The lack of INTELLIGENCE and literacy is destined to feel that only the world has the most ability, so the words of the pillow people are naturally unwilling to listen, and they feel that they are different.
But why do outsiders immediately behave very helpful at the first word? Because under the influence of the environmental atmosphere, he just wants to make himself look qualified, and a person's true quality is not to outsiders, but to see his attitude towards his partner
Women are of low self-worth
In the new type of "widowed" marriage, men's disregard for themselves often stems from the fact that women's own value does not reach the level of respect that the other party values.
For example, the man's social status, family background, all aspects of the conditions are higher than their own, and even some full-time wives need to rely on men to support family expenses, such a cooperative relationship, encounter such a situation is inevitable, because you do not have the other party's heart or jealous capital.
The reason why others act immediately after a word is not because he is warm-hearted, but most likely because outsiders will make him pay different degrees of price.
There is a problem with women's own way of expressing themselves
It is said that good medicine is bitter, but the way to express it is too "bitter", even if it is a "good medicine", it is difficult for the other party to absorb it.
The book "Psychology of Speech" reduces the process of people's communication to three elements, namely observation, listening and speech, and "Nonviolent Communication" also concludes that in the process of communication, the first thing to say is to express, it is feelings, not judgment, and to communicate in a way that the other party can accept, in order to achieve a benign communication effect.
Acting like a child, it will naturally produce a repulsive psychology, so that he is too lazy to listen to what you say, and when the man himself feels disrespected and his self-esteem is despised, it is difficult to pay attention to his wife's mood.
The essential difference between "nonviolent communication" and "violent communication" is that violent communication pushes the problems that arise in the relationship to the other party, while "nonviolent communication" is more willing to explore its own problems, care about each other's demands, and find a way to continue living in a way that can be comfortable for both parties.
When you are caught in a new type of "widowed" mode of marriage, remember to reflect on whether you have found the wrong person or your communication style is wrong.
So if you want to change your marital status, start from the way of communication, and really understand what you want to express, rather than simply releasing emotions, a new model may appear in the relationship.