1. The sister-in-law is about to give birth, the contractions are crazy, and the wife whispers in her ear: Sister, relax! Before I gave birth to a child, the pain was terrible, so I scolded your brother-in-law for being a weak king and a bastard, and hated your brother-in-law for being beaten by thousands

1. The sister-in-law is about to give birth, the contractions are crazy, and the wife whispers in her ear: Sister, relax! Before I gave birth to a child, the pain was terrible, so I scolded your brother-in-law for being a weak king and a bastard, hating your brother-in-law who was stabbed with a thousand knives, and he could be much more comfortable. The sister-in-law ripped open her throat and came: Brother-in-law! You are weak, sister... husband! ... You're a knife," ah... Brother-in-law you king... Eight... egg! Fortunately, I was not there, and the sister-in-law in the ward, her husband, in-laws, nurses, and other pregnant women were stunned!

2. I learned that at the school reunion next weekend, I paid 50,000 yuan in advance to buy a Wuling Hongguang. The students all drove BMW and Mercedes-Benz, and someone asked me: How to drive Wuling Hongguang to come? I said with a good face, my father originally bought me a Bentley, but I wanted to buy a Ferrari 485. Finally, regardless of whether the performance or configuration of the car is good or not, I will look at the number of parking spaces. Because considering that my girlfriend has 5, I chose Hiromitsu Goryo!

3. The little uncle is an ordinary worker in an electronics factory, but he is married to the school flower of Southeast University. Less than a month after the two were married, his wife said, "I want to divorce you!" The little uncle asked in surprise: "What wife, we just got married, why do we suddenly plan to divorce?" His wife: "When we weren't married, you told me that you wanted me to live in a hilltop villa, every day for candlelight dinner, and eat Western food, did you do it?" Little uncle: "Of course, the hilltop villa, our village is on the top of the mountain, our single-door single-family is not the same as the villa?" Candlelight dinner, which power outage we are not eating with candles, and Western food, you can check it, mashed potatoes is the staple food of Westerners. His wife: "You roll me!" ”

4. Some time ago, my husband was going to a party with his friends. The wife said: Take me! Husband: We said we wouldn't bring a wife! Wife: Then say that I am your sister, so that I can give you a long face! The husband looked up and down at his wife, and said quietly: Sister looks like you, I just can say it, they have to believe it! Wife?...... Alas, the result did not go!

5. The female star fell in love with Kuo Shao and desperately tried to get better and chase him. Now I heard that Kuo Shao already had a good feeling for the female star, but the female star gave up. The friend of the female star was puzzled and asked the female star: Why? Female star: He has a buddy who has been targeting him for two years, often making small moves behind his back to humiliate him. Friend: Then you should accompany him to carry it together! Female star: I don't deserve him, but I deserve his buddy, this kind of slutty person should be the old woman to plague for a lifetime! "

6. Isn't school open now, and children are taking online classes at home? But the niece was not attentive at home, and the sister-in-law told her bitterly about the importance of learning. The little girl just can't listen... The sister-in-law sighed and said: Your teacher looks so gentle, how do you take care of more than fifty of your classmates? Niece: Our teacher speaks softly to your parents, and is cruel to us, who disobeys the teacher to beat the hand with a ring ruler. Sister-in-law: You are such a naughty teacher who must have beaten you. Niece: How could you beat me, I'm so well-behaved and so cute. Sister-in-law: I don't know if the ruler beater hurts? Niece: It hurts, but it hurts, and I give my hands red...

7. The old man entrusted him with the relationship of card friends and sent me to work in the Greenland Group. Today I was late for work, but I met the manager in the elevator, and it turned out that the manager would also be late, hahahahaha! The manager smiled and said, "The world is so interesting, I can deduct your salary if you are late, and you see that I am late, and you have no way to do anything." "I hate!

8. Take a weekend break, and after lunch I go to the park to bask in the sun. At this time, I saw a neighbor aunt with a very cute child. So I went to tease her, and the child turned his head and said: Auntie, you are so ugly! The aunt gave the child a slap: Quickly apologize to the aunt, how to talk? Then the child cried and said, "Auntie, you are so beautiful." The aunt gave her another slap: I made you apologize, who made you lie? Anyway, I feel a faint pain in my heart.....

9. I opened an Internet café opposite our community, my sister-in-law has nothing to do at home, she will go to the Internet café to be my network manager, and her husband will go to my Internet café every day to pick her up and take her home. Yesterday her husband went early, so he opened a computer and played LOL. In the first round, her teammates gave her husband lucky to kill five, and shouted excitedly: Network manager! Management! I'm five kills! The sister-in-law walked over and bent down to kiss her husband's face, and several people next to her husband were stunned! Within half an hour, the brother next to her husband also shouted excitedly: Network manager, I also killed five!

10. My sister is a "brother-in-law demon", and a few days ago, my brother-in-law secretly gave me the family's 500,000 yuan deposit to buy a car. The brother-in-law was very angry, and had a big fight with his sister, and finally began to move. My nephew saw that the situation was not good, called me, and said anxiously: Uncle, my parents are fighting, you are coming soon! I suddenly panicked and said: What? I'll be there now! The nephew said: Hurry up, my mother beat my father on the ground. After listening to this, I said calmly: Oh, that's all right, I'll come back later.

11. Xiao Sheng fell ill and went to the hospital, and colleagues from the company went to visit the patient together. "During the time I took leave, I must have exhausted the people who led the shift, I'm really sorry..." Xiao Sheng said apologetically. Miss Going replied, "Okay, everyone has shared your work, I am responsible for reading the newspaper, Xiao Ping is responsible for calling and chatting, Xiao Ping is responsible for flirting with the general manager...". #Funny Moment #Funny Funny Paragraph ##搞笑幽默趣闻 #