A man was released from prison, and before leaving the prison guard asked him, "You are free, is there anything to say?" Man: "After so many years, I've had enough of it, and there's not a single woman."

A man was released from prison, and before leaving the prison guard asked him, "You are free, is there anything to say?" Man: "After so many years, I've had enough of it, and there's not a single woman." Prison Guard: "What crime did you commit?" Man: "It's just too heavy to shoot a woman!" Prison Guard: "I regret it now!" Man: "Now I really regret dying, I think carefully in prison, I was not a woman at all, it was a demon, they kept saying that I killed a woman, I was wronged!"

2. At that time, when Wu Cheng'en's notes were unveiled, it was explained that after the true and false Monkey King, the real Sun Wukong was caught by Rulai, destroyed his body, and sealed in the form of a soul in the eighteenth layer of hell, all because Rulai was worried that the real Wukong would threaten his position after the full event, and Rulai's master helped him solve Bodhi, otherwise Bodhi would find Rulai' thing, and the true and false Monkey Queen would no longer have Journey to the West

3, spent 30,000 yuan to buy a set of skin care products for the company's sister, the sister agreed to go on a date with me. The two of us went to the playground to play, and when we arrived, the girl had to go to the haunted house to play, and we boldly chose the hellish haunted house. As a result, when I went in, I regretted it, and I was frightened and screamed. Halfway through, a ghost came out from behind the crowd and chased us all the way. The girl couldn't bear it, she took the ghost's hand and asked, "How much money do you spend a month, so hard?" The ghost was stunned at first, then turned around and left!

4, the good big brother last month inverted the door to marry a rich woman worth billions, did not expect that the rich woman on the night of the wedding will have a heart attack and die. Big Brother took the inheritance and opened a super-large-scale bathing center. Yesterday I sent a small drive to the Cadillac to take a shower. After washing it out, the good big brother asked me to send small: Brother, are you a crayfish? Fa Xiao: What does this mean? Good big brother: Just now the uncle who scrubbed the bath said that you are not scrubbing, you are out of the shell!

5, recently and colleagues complained that overtime is too serious, feel a little overwhelmed by the body. My colleague suggested that soaking my feet in salt water would strengthen my body, so when I got home, I put two spoonfuls of salt in my foot tub. Then it occurred to me that I didn't know if it was appropriate or not. Afraid that the effect would not be good, I drank two sips with my mouth, felt light, added a few spoonfuls of salt and put it in my mouth to taste, well, this time the taste is just right.

6, the housemate hemorrhoids, in order to facilitate the use of disposable small plates to fill the medicine, the ointment blue really like mustard. A few people discussed it and took the mustard to change the medicine, and at night the housemate took the medicine and howled! Went to the shower but didn't accuse us. It's just that since then, the mustard we eat hasn't been spicy anymore...

7, netizens, are there a new car opened for less than 7 months, the car was driven to the repair shop for maintenance, the result was that the repairman went out in the name of maintaining the lights and encountered an accident, all the airbags were all burst, it is expected to repair about 120,000, how to settle the depreciation fee? How much can I pay? Thanks 🙏🙏🙏

8. Saw a report that a girl in Iceland was bitten by a neighbor's dog, and she used her car keys to poke the dog's eye in self-defense. In the end, the court ruled that the girl compensated the dog owner for about 60,000 yuan. The dog owner paid a one-time advance of about 4.28 million yuan for the girl's 30-year incubation period of rabies. The girl retires the dog owner for 416 yuan per day of life. Haha I think this judgment is very creative and fair, and the country should learn from it.

9, a homicide case occurred in a city, the cruel murderer killed the victim just after escaping, someone found the body, called the 110 police criminal police center immediately dispatched, the criminal suspect was arrested when interrogating the criminal suspect, found that he was a deaf and dumb person, he was interrogated in writing, after the written interrogation, the pre-trial person pondered for a while, said a word to this deaf-mute person, and immediately found that the deaf-mute person was the perpetrator, What did a criminal pre-trial judge disguised as a deaf-mute say that immediately exposed the criminal's feet?

10, working in Wanda Group, is on the job, the boss suddenly said to me: in the WeChat group to inform everyone to hold a meeting!! I was stunned, which onion do I count?? Hard scalp sent a notice. As a result, the expected spit did not appear, and many people nodded and smiled at me when I arrived at the conference room. After the meeting, it was different when I left the conference room, and a friend even kicked me in the back: You count a hair, what do you pretend, and think you have been promoted!!

1 Take an entrepreneur, run a physical enterprise or company, the beginning will have to invest tens of millions, it may take several years to enter the profit, then in these few years, the variables are difficult to predict. Self-media entrepreneurship, a can be said to be zero-cost entrepreneurship, need time, need to grow for a long time, almost cut off the "money and wealth, turbulent displacement" this risk, is to see if you can do, and dare not spend their own possible years of spring!

12, later his wife found me, it turned out that she looked at the WeChat of my mobile phone and returned the money to me. The first time I went to my wife's house a few years ago, her family came to a lot of relatives, eating at noon, after eating I just stood up to prepare the separation table, the result is that I don't know what happened, I didn't stand still, my feet slid to the table, and all my faces buckled into the plate containing braised meat, which was really embarrassing... When my wife brought a towel to wipe her face, I listened to my mother-in-law say: Xiao Sun loves to eat braised pork made by my aunt, next time I will make it for you to eat, like you even want to nibble on the plate is a little bad!

13, my daughter-in-law always looks at me for various reasons. Sometimes it's really hard to defend. Last night I was watching TV when my wife suddenly said that her phone was out of battery and that she wanted to watch a movie with me! I had a hunch that something was wrong. So I turned off the TV and concentrated on watching with my wife, who looked at me and finally opened my WeChat. Now my knees still hurt a little.

14, I looked at the phone, and said to my mother: "It's not good, tomorrow minus 12 degrees!" My mom obviously disagreed with me: "Huh? No, I just looked at the weather forecast on my phone, tomorrow minus 13 degrees! Why, the weather forecast also knows that your meat is thick and the temperature is not the same? ”