1, there is a young woman in the unit, divorced for two years, I thought about whether I could chase her in hand, one night I went directly to her house. She was having dinner alone, and when she saw me, she smiled and asked

1, there is a young woman in the unit, divorced for two years, I thought about whether I could chase her in hand, one night I went directly to her house. She was eating dinner alone, and when she saw me, she smiled and asked, can you have some wine? I said that I can drink a little, but it is the amount of three or two. She smiled and said, that's much better than me, and I'll have a drink. I smiled and said, then the two of us who can't drink well are drinking together, and it won't be long before we get drunk. She didn't care, she said, get drunk! As a result, before the bottle of liquor was finished, we couldn't do it. Two red clouds rose from her cheeks, and her eyes were confused, as if there were two pools of wine hidden inside. I also don't have the old reservedness and Sven, I looked at her directly and said, I like you for a long time, would you like to be my girlfriend? You give me a word. She shook her head and said, I don't want to be your girlfriend. I was extremely disappointed to hear that. Shaky ready to leave. But she grabbed me and said, I'm going to be your wife.

2, buddies work in a company, the performance has always been the bottom. Early this morning the boss called him to the office, and the boss said: I know that you have not improved now, but you must persist, like a stubborn stone, and learn its spirit. The buddies were very touched to hear it, and continued to redouble their efforts after returning. Two years have passed, and the buddies have perfectly proved a truth: as long as it is still a stone, no matter how hard it tries, it will not shine.

3, me and my girlfriends are foodies, we have been in the food industry for many years, eat buffet to eat out a set of strategies, it is impossible to return the original, but basically do not lose, can be called self-help sand hand. Recently, I opened a new self-service, and it is not bad to go once, and I am ready to try it again. When I entered the door, I also said to my girlfriend: This is a self-help, let's try it. Then the girlfriend cooperates: good, good! At this time, the waiter brother interjected: The two are coming again? Today is still who eats less and who invites?

4. After graduation, the roommate went to a company on the second floor for a job interview, and the interviewer manager asked: "When you came up, did you use the elevator?" The roommate said, "I'm useless." The interview manager said, "I'm sorry, we don't want useless people." The roommate said, "I'm on foot." Interview manager: "I'm sorry, but we don't want to." "Chinese characters are really profound!

5, I opened a local media company, the company is running well, I just finished a meeting with colleagues, saw my wife call me 20 times. I called back, and my daughter-in-law said to let me send tuition to my sister-in-law who was studying at Tsinghua. So, I drove my Maserati to Tsinghua, and as soon as I entered the classroom, I saw a coolly dressed young man confessing to his sister-in-law, he said: No matter who it is, as long as you bully you, I will not let him go! In order to test whether this boy was sincere, I reached out and put my arm around my sister-in-law. The young man saw me, turned his head and left, and I said to my sister-in-law: You see, now the men outside are lying to you. Before he could finish speaking, the young man came with a group of classmates in taekwondo suits...?

6, send the girlfriend home, this is also the brother once to go to the future mother-in-law's house, the heart can not help but be a little excited and nervous. After entering the house, the brother-in-law put down the dumbbell in his hand and asked me: Dude, can I practice well? Me: Great brother, very muscular. Then her brother grabbed his wrist, posed in a bodybuilding pose, and said to my girlfriend: Sister, hit me! The girlfriend didn't say a word, and huffed a punch in her brother's eye, and I was confused at the time.

7, winter is cold, a roommate lying in bed leads to being late every day. The old class blocked the door outside the classroom, and every time he could catch him, he was then severely criticized. So, the dormitory director secretly changed his alarm clock to a recording of the class teacher: Why haven't you gotten up yet! The next day, as soon as my roommate arrived at class, he said to us, "You know what? The class teacher just went to the dormitory, scared me that I didn't even dare to look at him, so I came up, and the clothes were worn on the road!?

8. After packing up my things this morning, I suddenly remembered that the computer I was using was broken. I discussed with my friends about going to buy a computer today, and when I bought a computer, I met a beautiful salesman girl. After discussing the price and buying the order, I couldn't help but ask her: Girl, what is the relationship between you and your boss is a relative? While packing my computer, my sister said to me: The boss is my father! I nodded silently without speaking, turned and left. In fact, sister, you miscalculated the account, less than 150 yuan for me, anyway, the boss is your father, I think I will not beat you!

9, my father is not assured that I will marry, and sure enough, I am still the one who hurts me in the family. My husband patted his chest to ensure that he would be good to me for the rest of his life, please rest assured. Dad took a sip of wine and patted his husband's shoulder: I am a, I have beaten invincible hands all over the village since I was a child, and the drunk big guy can't beat her, I don't trust you! Suddenly, my husband looked at me in horror and swallowed a mouthful.

10, I am a doctor in college, my parents for my academic work, do not let me fall in love. But I still secretly fell in love with the school grass and ate with him at night. Then I took two photos of the food and sent them to the circle of friends, and after a while, my mother called me and asked: Who is the man next to you, is it behind our backs to fall in love? I didn't admit it, my mother said: Don't pretend, I saw it in the reflection of the spoon! Mom, you're really good, you belong to Conan.

11. After entering the university, there is no money to pay the high tuition fees. Dad was fierce and cashed out a few bitcoins that he had treasured for many years. I went to college as I wished, and there was a strange thing in the same dormitory, which only cost 100 yuan a month. Even spending a penny must be carefully calculated, even fetching water for people, it is charged per time. Recently, in order to chase the school grass that the girls all have a crush on, she insisted on bringing him food every morning. A month later, the school grass was touched by her sincerity and agreed to her confession! The next day, she made a post on the school's announcement: "Rent handsome school grass!" 200 RMB per day! ”?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #