1, almost off the highway when the car ran out of gas, I said to my wife: "Do you believe it or not, we go to the service area of the exit to refuel, without giving money can go?" Naturally, the wife did not believe it. Add in the service area

1, almost off the highway when the car ran out of gas, I said to my wife: "Do you believe it or not, we go to the service area of the exit to refuel, without giving money can go?" Naturally, the wife did not believe it. After refueling in the service area, I said to the staff: "I didn't bring money, ask your webmaster to come and see what to do?" After a while, a young man came over, and as soon as he saw me, he said helplessly to the staff: "Let him go, that is my old uncle Lai, I will pay for the oil." ”

2. The sister-in-law replied: At that time, I did not approve of it, and I did not let him buy it. I asked again: How much family property did he leave for you? The sister-in-law cried: Two hundred and thirty million. Two hundred million is: remembrance, memories.? Thirty million: Don't take good care of the children, don't take good care of the elderly, don't remarry.

3. The cousin charged money because of the play of the God of War, and the sister-in-law sold the cousin's account in a huff. There was no game to play, and the cousin had to watch a TV series with his nephew, and the TV was playing a clip of the male protagonist proposing to the female protagonist on one knee. The nephew asked his cousin curiously, "Father, when you proposed to your mother, did you kneel down on one knee like this??? The cousin shook his head, and the nephew asked, "Why??? The cousin lit a Chinese cigarette, and then said slowly, "I am on my knees and wrapped around your mother's legs." Nephew: "Why are you wrapping your legs??? Cousin: "Your mother listened to my confession and wanted to run, if I hadn't wrapped her legs deadly, there wouldn't have been you at all!!! "

4. There is a "pork Xishi" in the market in the community, who is a divorced young woman who has just turned 30. Early that morning, the rich second generation went to buy meat, the young woman weighed a total of 46 yuan, and the rich second generation gave the young woman a 100 piece. The young woman charmingly blinked at the rich second generation, found the rich second generation for 51 yuan, and said: "Brother, there is not enough to eat at night and then come to Ha, give you a cheaper." "The second generation of the rich did not want to see the young woman in general, and left with the meat. Fu Er Dai sighed, "Alas! Unfortunately, people are really beautiful, but they don't know much. ”

5, I opened a food stall business busy with no time to take care of my son, it was when my son was on vacation, so I sent my son to my mother for my mother to take care of for a while. One night after eating and watching TV, my mother said: "You must have perseverance and perseverance as a person, don't look at me as I haven't gone to school, but I have insisted on reading the newspaper every day for decades." Son: "Grandma is really powerful, I want to learn from you with an open mind, what newspaper do you read every day?" Mom: "Weather forecast." ”

6. I remember that summer, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy clothes, and there was a video game area in the middle of the mall. There's a device inside, and visitors can laugh as soon as they throw a coin into their navel eyes. A handsome guy happily tossed a coin and listened to laughter. At this time, the girlfriend walked up to him and said: Handsome man, you throw it in my pocket, I laugh at you!

7, the wife secretly went to the plastic surgery and did not tell me. I looked at my wife, who looked different from before, and I had a fight with her. She went back to her mother's house in a huff, and at that time I was also angry, so I went by her! I thought that she would stay with her mother-in-law for a few days, and when she was out of breath, she would naturally come back! Unexpectedly, early the next morning, my wife ran back in ashes. I heard her muttering to herself: "It's better to be at home, you don't have to wash and cook every day!" ”?

8. After work, I stopped by to pick up my son from school, and was called by the teacher to talk. A parent next to me yelled at me: You said that you have to take good care of your children, such a small is not enough! I was dumbfounded! The teacher explained: Today the class asked if the child has a million want to do, some want to buy a house to honor their parents, some want to donate, your son is good, take his girlfriend's hand, shout to give her all the money, buy her a lot of good food! No, the girl is now at home arguing to go to your house and be your daughter-in-law...

9, girlfriends called me to eat in the past, made braised pork sweet and sour ribs and sauerkraut fish, are my favorite dishes, I can't help but want to shed ha lazi. At this time, my girlfriend's son pulled my hand and said, "Auntie, will you take me to buy lollipops?" After swallowing hard, he said, "Good." I opened the door and went out, and the little guy "bang~" behind the door and knocked the door: "Auntie, you go home to eat first, my mother's cooking is not enough for you to eat!" "I...

10, the last time I bought a pair of prps jeans online, the mail found that it was a little long, and contacted customer service to discuss a code. Because I was busy at work, I asked my brother to help me send it back. Ten days later, the seller still did not re-ship me, and quickly contacted me to say that he had not received the return... Call your brother: Did you mail out my pants? Brother: Brother! I'm dressed just right.........

11. I am almost 3 months pregnant, and the morning sickness is more severe. One day on the road driving, the stomach overturned the river and the sea, really can't hold on, quickly a sharp brake to stop and open the window to vomit. At this time, a teenager riding an electric car passed by, looked at me with a look of disbelief, and muttered in his mouth: "Oh my God, this is my own driving motion sickness, this is it?"

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #