1, the girlfriend's home suddenly black power outage, take advantage of the black kiss her, the result of the mother-in-law whispered... Don't make a fuss... I was stunned, I was obviously kissing my girlfriend, and when I was leaving, I asked my girlfriend: I

1, the girlfriend's home suddenly black power outage, take advantage of the black kiss her, the result of the mother-in-law whispered... Don't make a fuss... I was stunned at once, I obviously kissed my girlfriend, and when I left, I asked my girlfriend: Did I kiss you just now? The girlfriend said: Yes, what's wrong? I hurriedly said: It's all right...

2. After entering the university, there is no money to pay the high tuition fee. Dad was fierce and cashed out a few bitcoins that he had treasured for many years. I went to college as I wished, and there was a strange thing in the same dormitory, which only cost 100 yuan a month. Even spending a penny must be carefully calculated, even fetching water for people, it is charged per time. Recently, in order to chase the school grass that the girls all have a crush on, she insisted on bringing him food every morning. A month later, the school grass was touched by her sincerity and agreed to her confession! The next day, she made a post on the school's announcement: "Rent handsome school grass!" 200 RMB per day! ”

3, the local boss's Bentley driver has been driving for 20 years, and today the driver proposed his resignation with him. Before parting, the Bentley driver laughed: "In fact, every time I drive your car, I sneak around by myself." The local boss said: "I know, if you are honest, what does it matter if this car is for you!" The Bentley driver said, "Boss, after marrying your daughter tomorrow, yours will be mine." The local tycoon boss was furious: "Wolf ambition." ”

4. A month after I fell in love with my girlfriend, she was checked out in the hospital and she was pregnant. I was a responsible man, so I went to her house to propose to her. Uncle said: Your monthly salary is only 3500 yuan, and you can't even afford to give a dowry of 100,000 yuan!!! I disagree!!! Me: Uncle, have you heard of JD.com and Alipay??? The uncle said in surprise: You mean that you have deposited money in JD.com and Alipay??? Me: No, I have 30,000 JD white strips, 20,000 ant flower shells, and 50,000 ant loans, which add up just enough for the bride price!!!

5. Today, I went to the billiard hall with a few buddies to play billiards. When we came out, we saw a passing girl at the door of the billiard hall, and her back was very beautiful. The buddies sang loudly: "Lift your hijab, let me see your face..." The girl heard someone singing behind her and looked back curiously. The buddies sighed and sang again: "Sister, you boldly go forward, go forward, don't look back..."

6. The old man bought 12 million yuan of Dale and immediately bought a house in Tomson Yipin. One day, the brother who moved in, the neighbor opposite came to borrow something. Yu Ju said, "My family's whetstone is broken, can you borrow it from your house and use it?" The old man: "Okay, but you are grinding here." After a week, the old man went to his home to borrow a ladder. The old man: "My family's ladder is broken, can you borrow your ladder from me?" "Okay, but you're climbing here." ”

7. When I was a child, there was a persimmon tree at home, and I always wanted to eat it, and one day I found that her persimmon tree had a branch sticking out of the wall. I hurried up and tried to pick some persimmons, but unfortunately there was a pit by the wall, standing at the edge of the pit, just out of reach. So I asked my sister to take my hand, and the two of us were enough together. My sister didn't let go, and I pulled her down the cesspool.

8, my husband had a relationship of more than seven years before me, but he was my first love. I was unbalanced, so I asked him: What is the difference between me and your ex-girlfriend? Husband: She is an unfinished game of chess; you are an unfinished chess game. And I asked: What would you do if you lost me? Husband: I don't want to think about tea, I just want to drink!

9. On weekends, my brother and sister-in-law worked overtime and sent my nephew here. He was so mischievous that he ran wildly around the house, only to break one of his mother's favorite teacups, and his mother beat up his nephew. Just drinking tea, I accidentally broke a teacup, and my mother glared at me with a black face, but didn't say anything. The nephew saw this, shook his head and sighed, "Alas! Or a self-born girlfriend! Alas—" Therefore, my mother beat me up as a sign of justice...

10, Dad asked me to find a job, otherwise he would let me take over the family company. Came to a national top 500 company. Interviewer: Which university did you graduate from? Me: Fudan. Interviewer: Do you know that Peking University's enrollment score of 685 points that year? Me: You know, I almost went to Peking University. Interviewer: How many points did you get on the test? Me: 68.5! Interviewer: How did you get into Tsinghua with such a score? Me: I didn't read in Fudan, I squatted at home, and I took Classes in Fudan!

11, when I went to college, my girlfriend was a school flower, a million people were fascinated, and there were many male brothers chasing her. But the girlfriend fell in love with a nerd, and the family had no money. Finally, my girlfriend also married him yesterday my girlfriend was hospitalized, I went to visit her, she cried and said: In the future, when you come to find your husband, you must polish your eyes! If you look at the wounds on my body, they are the result of blindness. I was amazed: he actually hit you! The girlfriend sobbed and said: Today we quarreled, I wanted to kick him down the stairs, but the goods hid, I fell down!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #