01
In a lifetime, I spend the most time with "myself", but I often can't see myself clearly. Just like the nose and the eyes, the distance is particularly close, and the eyes have spent a lifetime and cannot see the nose clearly.
Socrates said, "The unsexamined life is not worth living." ”
Even if you don't understand it yourself, then every day, it will be very tangled, like a mess, which position to pull, can't be clear.
Man, once he understands himself, he can find a clear vein from the inextricable relationships, and his heart will suddenly open up.
02
One of my female classmates, married, divorced again. Now I have a new boyfriend. Whether or not to marry again, she was afraid.
She told me that her current boyfriend is very good to her, but the family conditions are really not good, relatives and friends are "quite critical", afraid of the future days, poor and scum. However, no one loudly objected, because she was married for the second time, and perhaps missed this man, and she would never meet a suitable person again.
Also, she didn't dare to leave her boyfriend easily because the two of them worked in the same company. If you break up and go to work later, you will definitely be pointed out. What I dare not think about is that two people often meet in the company, which will be particularly embarrassing; after the boyfriend finds a new girlfriend, will he feel particularly uncomfortable inside.
The female classmate found a way out: if she really broke up, she took the initiative to resign, go to a far place, and find a job again.
As a bystander, I did not understand, what kind of love does this female classmate want?
First, divorced, is it to meet someone better, or is it because you can't tolerate your ex-husband? Second, in the end, she wants to find a man with a good family, or a man who still loves her and has a family in general? Third, do you not break up because you are afraid that you will not get along in the future, or do you really decide to get married? Fourth, why do you assume that two people break up in the first place?
I felt like she was a "stutterer", standing on her feet for half a day, not knowing what to express and what direction to go.
Tu Lei, a love mentor, said: "Women, when they are young, they generally don't care about warm men around them, they prefer men who can conquer the world." But she didn't know that the men who could conquer the world also wanted to conquer the women of the whole world. ”
In love, you often have to do multiple choice questions, is the person on the left good, or the person on the right?
If you don't know what kind of love you want to pursue, then you choose either side, it is wrong, and it must end in tragedy.
03
Marriage, for a woman, can be considered a second life.
Before getting married, it's best to draw a picture and press Tussoji – find your own Prince Charming.
Perhaps, your Prince Charming, in the eyes of others, is an "ordinary person", but it meets your requirements and can talk to each other, which is enough.
Life is not to live for others to see, but to live as you want.
First, understand your expectations.
Do you want a palatial high-rise building in the city, or do you want to go to the countryside and build a small courtyard where you can watch the stars in the summer and charcoal fire in the winter.
For the other half, do you want him to do business and make a fortune, or do you want to go to work and live at home? Or, you want him to start a business with you, make money, and go wandering.
No one knows which one will come first tomorrow or the accident, but you can plan it. Then, no matter who you're in a relationship with, speak your mind out and see if he thinks the same thing you do.
You know, the person who "coincides" is the person who agrees with your three views. If you have no direction at all, you will be led by the nose by the other party. Halfway through, you find that the family designed by the other party is not what you want, and the contradiction escalates from then on, and no one can convince anyone.
Second, understand your own strength.
Will Cinderella marry a prince? Can a toad eat swan meat?
Seeing too many fairy tales, there is no benefit to the thinking and attitude of adults. If you are a village girl in the countryside, it takes great courage and unlimited opportunities to marry a rich man. Even if two people are married, there will be a lot of pressure.
The man who can conquer the world, if you want to be with him, you must have the "ability to conquer the world".
Whoever you are, you will meet. If you want to meet good men, force yourself to be good instead of waiting.
Love needs to be evenly matched, and pity and sympathy cannot be regarded as true love.
Third, understand your original family.
Since ancient times, marriage has emphasized "door to door".
Poverty alleviation marriage will not be happy. As the saying goes, "The son-in-law is also half a child." "Reality tells you that the difference between a son-in-law and a son is very big, and he may also look down on the poor mother's family."
Fourth, understand your own past.
Can everything in your past be accepted by the other party?
Some people have talked about N times in love, but they require the other party to be in love for the first time, what is the logic of this? It's really overbearing.
Before getting married, you should confess that you have been in love, have a history of marriage, and have done any dirty things in the past, and don't wait for marriage to suddenly blow up these situations.
The person who loves you will be able to accept your past. The guy who cares a lot about the "past" doesn't really love you at all. Of course, you should not wronged yourself because of him.
04
Women should understand that there will be many people in a lifetime, and there will be some people who are heartwarming. But the person who accompanies you to the old, there is only one.
Love is a moment and a half of passion, plus a lifetime of plain as water. Don't be wishful thinking about loving someone and looking forward to an infinitely better future.
When a woman is younger, she tends to overestimate herself because beauty gives her more confidence. Even good luck is put on beauty.
When a woman reaches middle age, she will be arrogant and thin, thinking that she has become a yellow-faced woman and no one loves her. In the face of a not-so-good marriage, I complain every day and complain that the people around me are too incompetent.
Understand yourself, analyze rationally, and evaluate feelings objectively. Your strengths will be more obvious, and your life will always have light.
Know how to want what you can get.
Marriage cannot be a confused account.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.