During the New Year, it is happy for the family to get together, but Shen Xi is very afraid of being "urged to get married" during the New Year, which makes her feel pressure in the happy year.
"Mom, I don't want to go on a blind date!" "Just to meet and meet, why are you so stubborn kid."
Such quarrels usually occur in Shen Xi's house. Since Shen Xi found a job, marriage has become a top priority in the eyes of his parents.
"I know that my parents are for my own good, they want me to start a family as soon as possible, and they will be relieved to have someone to accompany me and take care of me." But for me personally, I still want to focus more on my work. ”
Whenever blind dates are mentioned, a "vicious battle" will always break out between Shen Xi and her parents. For a while, Shen Xi was even afraid to return home. She didn't want to argue with her parents, but she was powerless to resolve the conflict between the two generations.
"I work in a field, close to home, I usually go home on weekends, but some time ago I was really resistant to coming home. My parents always stood in the shoes of people who came over and advised me to obey, but they never listened to my inner thoughts. ”
Obviously the closest family members, but transformed into hedgehogs, attacking each other's softest abdomen. It is clear that communication can solve the problem, but everyone covers their ears and allows irrational emotions to vent.
"In addition to blind dates, there are many contradictions that are the trigger for quarrels. At the end of the day, my parents and I had little communication and difficulty understanding each other's perspectives. We always stand on our own side, but we never want to go over and integrate, to find a middle point. ”
Like many young people, Shen Xi is a little afraid of the New Year. At that time, there was not only the urging of parents, but also the "team attack" carried out by the elders in the family. In the past, Shen Xi always chose to escape, either returning to work early, or always running out and avoiding people at home.
This year, after realizing the problem of family communication, Shen Xi began to try to communicate openly with his parents. She learned to express herself and listen to her parents' different ideas.
"I used to reject my parents' views, but in fact, many problems can be quickly found after we communicate with each other to find a mutually agreeable solution. Communication does not mean a compromise between one side, but rather a collision of opinions between the two sides to find a more suitable 'answer'. ”
Therefore, before the New Year this year, Shen Xi made an agreement with his parents - not to talk about marriage during the New Year, not to give Shen Xi pressure on blind dates, and everyone to reunite together to celebrate the New Year happily.
"I didn't want to be 'urged' during the New Year, which would make me feel stressed, so I discussed it with my parents beforehand. This may be a good start for our family, a new opportunity to learn to respect each other's preferences and understand each other's choices. ”
Today is the fifth day of the first lunar month, and the custom of eating dumplings "breaking the five" makes Shen Xi get up early in the morning and start busy. She prepared her favorite spicy cabbage, her mother's favorite cabbage, and her father's favorite sauerkraut.
"Today I plan to pack three different flavors of dumplings to meet the preferences of everyone in the family, so that we don't have to accommodate each other. In fact, home is like a plate of dumplings, mutual understanding, openness and tolerance, different tastes can also be gathered, different styles can also be harmonious. ”
The steaming dumplings were served on the table, and the mother, who only loved to eat cabbage filling, fell in love with the taste of spicy cabbage after tasting Shen Xi's craft, and Shen Xi, who loved spicy food, also understood the beauty of sauerkraut.
"In the new year, I will spend more time with my parents, and I will try to understand their thoughts like eating dumplings. I believe that with continuous communication, the family will be more united and warm, and we can all find suitable ways to express care and transmit love. ”
The dynasty is twilight, and the years are yearly. Home is always the warmest harbor, and family is always the warmest dependency. Learn to communicate and understand, and know how to be tolerant and considerate. Quarrels only hurt loved ones the most, and communication allows us to find the most suitable answers.
Edit: Small packets
Proofreader: Sui Xin
Image: Courtesy of Photogram
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