In today's life, the child's life seems to be inseparable from the help of parents, for most ordinary families, whether it is for children or marriage, or for the child's married life, many places need to help themselves, which also makes many elderly people busy for a lifetime, to retirement, but also still need time to be busy, need to continue to worry about children.
In our traditional concept, the in-laws often need to take care of the responsibility of taking care of their children and grandchildren, because the woman belongs to the family of the man, and the children and grandchildren often follow the surname of the in-laws after birth, so it is reasonable for the in-laws to take care of the death of grandchildren and grandchildren, but with the development of the times, more and more people have begun to have their own lives and have their own way of life, so it seems that the matter of taking care of children and grandchildren is not so single-minded.
So after having children and grandchildren, are you willing to contribute money or contribute? The three mothers-in-law spoke the truth, although helpless, but also reasonable
Aunt Chen: With the baby for three years, the body and mind are haggard
I have been retired for three years, but during these three years I have been living in my son's home, helping my son with children, and now the children are also grown up, and it is easy to bring some, and now life is a little easier, every day just send the children to school, pick up the children at night, and I go home to live with my wife on the weekends.
These three years of life have been physically and mentally exhausting for me, because not only with children, but also with family relationships.
When I bring a baby, I am actually a person who has come over, most of the time I rely on my own experience to take care of the child, whether it is eating, wearing, or the way of the child in daily life, it is my own experience to take care of, but in the end there are many differences with today's times, resulting in the relationship between me and my daughter-in-law has always been very tense, there have always been some contradictions in life, and there will be some dissatisfaction between each other, although my son has been helping me talk during the period. But the result is that the more you help, the more you increase the dissatisfaction in your daughter-in-law's heart.
The final result is that I have done a lot of things for the daughter-in-law is not satisfied, and the daughter-in-law said some of the things I can not really do, so I did not do happy, the daughter-in-law has been dissatisfied in her heart, we have also made a lot of awkwardness, the son at home is also very tired in the end, I feel that I worked hard to help with the child is very tired, the result is not to get the daughter-in-law's satisfaction, suffered grievances, after three years with the baby, I began to feel physical and mental exhaustion, and I did not get a good return.
Aunt Zhou: With the baby for a year, too tired, do not bring
Since my daughter-in-law had children, I moved to take care of my daughter-in-law's confinement, but I only took care of it for a year, I felt too tired, I didn't want to take care of it, and finally gave my son a sum of money and asked him to hire a nanny himself.
My family conditions are relatively good, my husband has made a lot of money in business over the years, and I have also learned to invest in others and opened a restaurant, although the business of the hotel has been sluggish in recent years, but I am not very worried about it, which has time to help take care of my daughter-in-law.
During this year, I have been very busy, not only to take care of the daughter-in-law's body, but also to help take care of the child, the child is very noisy every day, plus a variety of things, to use a good not exaggerated sentence: with the child is more tired than I run the restaurant, every day the child wakes up, I also have to wake up, when the child wants to eat, but also have to rush to help busy work, this year I have been busy, and the relationship between the daughter-in-law has also been affected, after all, there will always be some friction between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, After all, the concept of life is different, the lifestyle is also different, not to mention the baby, so after the daughter-in-law of the waiter came out of the confinement, I insisted for a year, I chose to go home to busy with the hotel, and this year I will not go to take the baby.
However, considering the mood of the daughter-in-law, I still gave my son some money privately, let the son go to a nanny to take care of, and let the son tell the daughter-in-law that I was too busy in the shop, so I didn't have time to take the baby, and I didn't want to make the relationship between each other too tense, and the son could understand me, after all, he also knew that I was idle and used to it, and didn't say anything, but I was afraid of my daughter-in-law thinking more, but when she knew that I gave the money to ask for a babysitter, in fact, she could still accept it in her heart. In the days that followed, we didn't make a lot of trouble, compared to me, my daughter-in-law seemed to believe in the nanny more, but it didn't matter, anyway, my son's own life was happy, I could do anything.
Aunt Park: I have been with my baby for two years, and my life is not satisfactory
It is said that mother-in-law with grandchildren is a very common, very normal thing, the same for me, when the son married in life I also smoothly undertook the life with the baby, there is no exception, from the daughter-in-law pregnancy to now, it has been two years, life is not satisfactory, if you can choose again, I guess I do not want to come to the baby, the feeling of not being able to do it.
After the little grandson came out, life is still very pleasant, but also very happy, I am also full of confidence want to contribute to the child, want to take good care of the grandson, but this is just I think, in life I am also as far as possible to take the grandson, as far as possible to put all their energy on the child's body, but in the end there is a difference between the daughter-in-law, there is a conflict, many places let us have always had quarrels, there are discord, and these quarrels in the end also led to the estrangement of the relationship.
Maybe it is the difference in the concept of life, or the difference in life experience, the child's various problems have followed, and they have also produced various disagreements, and from her expression, it can be seen that she is very dissatisfied, although we are not completely fighting each other, but the atmosphere is particularly easy to feel, and I can only bear not to say it for the sake of the stability of the child's marriage, and I am not willing to argue with my daughter-in-law.
In the past two years of life, I am actually more like a nanny, I have not received any special respect and support, but more dissatisfaction, and the relationship with my daughter-in-law is also far and near, it is difficult to guarantee whether there will be conflicts in the next moment, it is difficult to ensure whether there will be contradictions in the next thing, but I still feel that I take care of my grandson better, after all, I am my own grandson, I also like it very much.
Write at the end:
The age gap between the two people, the difference in the concept of life, will lead to a great difference in what they do in life, which is beyond doubt, but as a daughter-in-law, to understand the concept of the mother-in-law, most of the mother-in-law is difficult to keep pace with the times, and as a mother-in-law, you should also understand the tension and caution of the daughter-in-law's first mother, only two people respect each other, mutual understanding, timely resolution of contradictions, In this way, the two people will not have more quarrels and dissatisfactions in the matter of taking the baby.
What do you think?