After Gu Qingyu and Shi Yuan went back to see their parents, they complained about their mother-in-law like this:
"In fact, I am mentally prepared, his parents may not like me, because I am busy at work and can not take care of the family, now that I am older, it may be a problem to have children, or my salary is higher than Shi Yuan, they think he can't eat me, I think the old man has these ideas are normal, I can understand, but I really did not expect that my mother thought that I was not born well enough." 」
Such a dislike, let alone Gu Qingyu, who has a strong modern female ideology, is also difficult to accept on any ordinary woman.
Although Gu Qingyu's family situation is not outstanding, but it is definitely not to the point of being disliked, his father is a retired teacher, she also has a good career, but Shi Yuan, her own education and income are not as good as Gu Qingyu, the family has a sick mother, owed a huge debt... Such a gap between the two sides, in the eyes of anyone, Gu Qingyu should not be the one who is rejected.
But her mother-in-law, Hua Yongyu, just hated her.
Why did Hua Yongyu dislike Gu Qingyu?
On the surface, Hua Yongyu once came from a large family, and he still retained that innate purity and pride, and there was still a foolish portal prejudice in his bones.
But this is only the surface, Hua Yongyu, who has lived for decades, even if she is isolated from the world again, she will not know that she is no longer the era when the janitor was born. What's more, even if they are from the janitor's background, they are not the big families of that year.
In psychology, there is actually such a phenomenon: the more inferior people are, the more they look down on others. Because he wants to prove that he is superior to others, but in fact, he really does not have much superiority over others, so he constantly belittles others and despises others to elevate himself.
Hua Yongyu is such a kind of person, Shi Yuan said, she has suffered a lot, and large families who suffer such a downfall will inevitably be unwilling. So Hua Yongyu turned this reluctance into an expectation for her son, and she hoped that his son would be able to stand out and fight for her.
This is why she felt that her son was "pity" after hearing that Shi Yuan and Gu Qingyu had been married. In her heart, her son is the work she uses to prove herself, and she has worked so hard to cultivate for so many years, but it is out of her control, and of course she will be heartbroken.
In fact, even if it is not Gu Qingyu, any woman, as long as it is not the daughter of the Huang sister's family that she chose, she will not approve, and she will feel unworthy of her son. What she dislikes is not Gu Qingyu, but the identity of "daughter-in-law", because a daughter-in-law who is out of control means that her works have been robbed or even destroyed.
If Shi Yuan married the daughter of Huang Sister's family, wouldn't Hua Yongyu be disgusted?
Here we must first clarify a question, that is, why Hua Yongyu insisted on letting Shi Yuan marry the daughter of Huang Sister's family.
In Hua Yongyu's view, Huang Yongyu is a big family with the same family as her, although now she herself has fallen, but she still has a son, if the son can still marry the daughter of a family of friends, it means that they still belong to the same class.
She said that only the daughter of Huang Sister's family could match her own son, but in fact, she still wanted to prove herself through her son's marriage. In fact, if Shi Yuan really married the daughter of the Huang family, it was also the Shi family who climbed high, and there was no "door to door" like Hua Yongyu said.
Hua Yongyu, who wants to prove herself and is full of inferiority in her subconscious and arrogant on the surface, is actually well aware, so if Shi Yuan can really marry the daughter of Huang Sister's family, she will not dislike this daughter-in-law at first, but the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will have other problems.
What's the problem?
In Hua Yongyu's heart, her son belonged to her carved works from beginning to end, and she hoped that he would marry this daughter-in-law, because she thought that this daughter-in-law met her expectations. What was her expectation? Before the daughter-in-law passed the door, she expected her daughter-in-law to be born in a high door, and after the daughter-in-law entered the door, she expected her to be gentle and virtuous and filial to her in-laws. At the same time, she can't take her son.
But you think, such expectations are placed in today's family relationships, is it possible? Especially for a girl like this who has a superior family background, how can she be obedient to her mother-in-law in everything, and also take into account her mother-in-law's feelings to maintain a state of alienation from her husband. Therefore, after a long time, the mother-in-law will inevitably look at this daughter-in-law who is not pleasing to the eye.
Their family relationship will become a mess, and even such a marriage will not last long.
Such a mother-in-law is essentially unclear.
In fact, whether she looks down on Gu Qingyu or the daughter of Huang Sister's family, Hua Yongyu's thoughts and behaviors are all unclear, and she can't figure out how many pounds she has.
Yes, she is inferior, but she is inferior to herself, and for her son, she is infinitely overrated, she feels that her son is excellent, everywhere is good, and any woman who marries him is taking advantage.
Therefore, such a mother-in-law, no matter what kind of daughter-in-law she has, she will not really like this daughter-in-law. Marrying Gu Qingyu, she felt that she was not worthy of her son, and if she married the daughter of Huang Sister's family, she was doomed to live up to her expectations. The daughter-in-law has a bad relationship with her son, and she will worry about her son being bullied; the daughter-in-law has a good relationship with her son, and she is afraid that her son will be robbed.
She actually hopes that she will always be the most important one in her son's heart, that everyone will follow her, that everything will be carried out according to her ideas, that the son will marry her to the chosen daughter-in-law, and that the daughter-in-law will live according to her wishes.
But she forgot that she was just an ordinary person, and she simply did not have the ability and strength to demand all this. To put it bluntly, she doesn't know how many pounds she really has, and she doesn't know how to find happiness for her son down-to-earth.
This kind of mother-in-law who can't figure out her own weight is doomed to be sad.
Not only will she allow herself to live in this entanglement of inferiority and pride, but she will also make her son's marriage unhappy and peaceful.
Just like Shi Yuan, being able to marry Gu Qingyu was originally his luck and blessing. But because of the existence of this mother-in-law, daily life has become angry and gambling.
In fact, what I want to say is that in our lives, there are also many such mothers-in-law, who never examine how many pounds they have, but just blindly ask others how they are.
If you are such a mother-in-law, if you do not want your son to become another source of generosity, then, from now on, please carry your own pounds first.
About the author: Meet and miss, a woman who likes to read and write, focusing on the creation of articles in the emotional field and the analysis and answer of emotional questions, I hope that my words can accompany you warmly forward.